Wednesday, December 21, 2022

The Top 10 moments of The Last Of The Americans in 2022

  (0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James in his office physically)

TLOTA:
I’m James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans, and the views that I’m about to express are that of my own and some of yours. 2022, felt like the unofficial sequel year to 2020! (Cut to moments from The Last Of The Americans in 2022 as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA(V.O.):
Between dwindling numbers in audience views and Chad coming up with bad ideas that have slowed my evolution to the next step to a point where my professional reputation took a massive hit to the point where my fuse is shorter than a Tiktok video. And now, we talk about the project that has been a fight to get off the ground which IS my next evolutionary step on the path to more success in my profession. On the plus side, I finally got that rat bastard Doug Walker out of my life in terms of competition, met a fan, and had all sorts of good times, and Ten of them are coming your way! (Cut to James physically. That's right, five from you and five of my own! (Cut to James as he turns into James Faraci)

James Faraci:
So it's time for the Top Ten Moments of The Last Of The Americans in 2022.

(Scene begins with a laser hitting a slab of Titanium as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as three shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As the three run out of frame moving forward, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left, and John and Mike Santos and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left, and Olivia Horvath appears in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written and directed by James Faraci, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions” as it ends the Laser beam disappears and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appears. At the 0:32-0:36 mark, the word “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down, and James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into the frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 10
(Cut to clips of "Reality Checkout: "The Real World" destruction of MTV" as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
Originally, I had planned this to be a Reality Checkout on the "16 & Pregnant/Teen Mom" series, but I scrapped it due to one personal event and one realization.  The personal event was that I welcomed a new family member, baby Kinsleigh, and realized the series was a symptom of a network ravaged by Reality TV disease.  And to be honest, I was there when MTV was Music Television, NOT Mediocre Television. While yes, I will admit I enjoyed the first few seasons, I found the series no longer interesting. However, the network meant to showcase Up and Coming Musicians and see legends get a younger fan base saw its Modis Operandi tossed out the window, and TV has gotten worse because of it. I also thought it would be a great lead-in for what was at the number two spot.

(Show clip of James shouting "CHAD!" as the echo roars over Sullivan County, All of New York, the United States, the Earth, and then the rest of the world as it fades to black then cuts to the 0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 9
(Cut to "The Punisher" and The Punishment of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans" as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
Sitting through this was actually fun. Watching The Russian and Frank fight reminded me why their brawl almost made my Top Ten funniest fights list back in 2015. However, when I posted a link in August on Manic Expression, I got a comment correcting certain things, like why Frank Castle's new logo looks the way it does. The commenter said quote, "As for the Punisher’s skull, it’s been co-opted by a number of people who miss the whole point of the Punisher’s character, such as cops (the Punisher exists because of a FAILURE of the system, and he is an outlaw), and … well, some really nasty extremist groups I’d rather not mention here. Changing the Punisher’s symbol in the comics is how Marvel deals with the problem in the short term, at least." endquote. He also commented on my framing story, which is the continuous headache Chad Narducci gives The Last Of The Americans. And Yes, The references to a certain internet game show were to show how much the wrong people and the wrong ideas helped destroy that site and certain people's credibility. Aware of that, I have been referencing how credibility and reputation can be destroyed, and if others keep pushing bad, that will destroy you professionally and personally.

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 8
(Cut to "The Different Cuts of ROCKY IV" clips as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
Watching both versions of this movie and seeing how different these two movies are. I mean, the classic Rocky IV is so well-known when I put on the Drago cut; I was surprised at how Stallone remade what many fans consider a classic in his filmography. Though I was surprised by how different the Drago cut was from the theatrical cut. Many known elements were either removed, downplayed, or given more time. The Robot in Rocky IV was removed, Uncle Paulie, played by Burt Young, and Ludmilla Drago, played by Brigitte Nielson, was severely downplayed. Surprisingly when Dolph Lundgren was given more time, he showed he could act. However, I felt the classic worked better because it was more well-known. Once people see the Drago Cut more, they might give it a chance. And since it was Rocky, I decided to satire something. That's when I decided to go for the obvious, the "Rocky III" freeze frame ending between Apollo and Rocky. Thankfully Chad and I agreed to do that in one take. And I loved getting a chance to talk about this movie.

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 7
(Cut to "Nine years and "The Quest" continues" clips as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
This was one I HAD to review as a Superman fan myself; I knew all that I needed to know about the movie. Then I had to deal with what I called the Linkara connection. That means knowing when someone does a review of this movie, Linkara is more or less likely to be on board. This is where I also gave my character a challenge and a setback that would help give me something to overcome. To placate Chad Narducci for something beyond his control, The Last Of The Americans had to give up majority control of his production company to Chad. But it was also when I was working on the review that I noticed something no one else had. In the same scene Lex was dancing with that Marie Antoinette look alike, Lenny, played by Jon Cryer, was playing with A ROB the Robot on a Nintendo Entertainment System! That's right! THE first recorded showing of a Nintendo on the big screen and it wasn't in The Wizard but it was in fact, Superman IV: The Quest For Peace! Also, I felt I had to defend the whole Superman taking on Nuclear Disarmament because with things just as tense as it was back in the 1980's and with world leaders being less competent now, we need someone with no political ties to stop us from hurting ourselves! And the whole "There will be peace" Speech makes sense when you realize that no Government will give it to them, not even our Government. So when you understand those aspects, even the cheesier moments aren't as bad nor will they make any more sense.

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 6
(Cut to clips of the Last Of The Americans "Austin Powers Trilogy" as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
Sitting through these three, I had forgotten how good Mike Myers was as an actor and a writer. Some jokes were so well-timed that I had to put in my take on them. Plus, I wanted to expand my character by showing he had something before he was an Internet Reviewer. Also to explain some of the technology James had. However as I was going on this ride, tragedy struck one of our own. As I was finishing up this trilogy Marsha Kent-Rodriguez AKA She-Rod AAKA the wife of Eric "E-Rod The Blockbuster Buster" Rodriguez passed away due to complications from COVID complications. I dedicated what was unanimously agreed the best of the trilogy which happened to be "The Spy Who Shagged Me". This also marked me doing research on the movies and the stories behind things that happened while the movie was made. So getting to add more to give people felt good and this was one of my favorite trilogies, I've done for my three month season premiere!

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 5
(Cut to "Life's a "Splash"" clips as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
This was one I wanted to review because it remains one of the last great romantic comedies I've ever seen, and I wanted to celebrate this movie by reviewing it. I also addressed the Allison Pregler elephant in the room and mentioned what Disney+ did when they released the movie on that platform. Also, maybe it's me, but I loved how the story and acting were so well-paced when I was younger. But going into it with all the information, I found it an even more interesting story. I had to share that Allen was willing to give Madison up to save her from being a Government experiment. I felt for Eugene Levy's Character, Dr. Cornbluth, first having to struggle with feelings of inadequacy and feeling that you have to prove yourself with everything you do, having to defend your rights, even if you're alone in them, having to fight for every scrap of dignity only to have someone come and pummel you nearly to death because of it. I made this one of my favorite reviews because I put a lot of effort into giving it the dignity it deserves. 

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 4 
(Cut to "Ghostbusters have an "Afterlife" of five hundred years" & "The "Extreme" end of "Ghostbusters" clips as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
Watching Ghostbusters: Afterlife, I saw something that was perfectly cathartic after having 2019 and 2020 be two of the worst years of my life, both personally and professionally; I needed to have a movie that allow me to laugh and cry at the same time. So to honor this, I decided that this movie needed a review worthy of the movie itself, no sketches, no comedy unless it was a joke worthy of The Last Of The Americans. As for the Extreme Ghostbusters review, that was partly because I needed a crossover, and I think the one at the number two spot would probably not count as a real crossover. Which is when I remembered I had to deal with the Extreme Ghostbusters. While I was the expert in the series, having seen it in its original syndicated run. Having checked out what I thought was essential to the series, Rowdy came up with some of the best jokes I've heard in a review, and everything just worked. It was something I needed to watch, and I needed to celebrate in my review.

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 3 
(Cut to clips of both "What Is Star Trek Syndrome? & "A Taste of The Rainbow"

James Faraci (V.O.):
Ashleigh Burton inspired this one as she watched "Galaxy Quest," and I decided to give it a watch. Once I did, I discovered that not only was this a parody of Star Trek, but it felt more like a study of what happened to the cast of Star Trek and to the creator Gene Roddenberry and then I saw it in other fandoms. It helped postulate a theory I had about tv and movie franchises, the cast, and the people who work on these franchise series. I surmised and came to conclusions that hopefully everyone would understand. "A Taste Of The "Rainbow" got done because my plans to review of "The Man" fell through because outside of a few jokes. So I had to ask everyone I could help with something to review. Rowdy AKA Chris Lee Moore, saved my backside with Rainbow Brite and The Star Stealer! However when I saw it, it made me remember of something I had seen 25 years ago this year.  Joel Schumacher's "Batman & Robin!". So I had gotten those Vietnam Flashbacks and decided to put that experience into the review. (Show the clip of James as he has his Vietnam Flashback to "Batman & Robin" and as it ends James continues his voiceover) Just two favorites that tied at the same point. Fans loved both and I loved them so why not let them share the same spot.

(Show clip of James as he wakes up from his Vietnam Flashback covered in blood and Rainbow colors as Rowdy asks "What happened?" and James responds with "I don't know!" Cut to 0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Number 2
(Cut to clips of "April's Showers bring a whole lotta "CARNAGE" as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (V.O.):
Kent Lilly was a great person to put up with me and my directing and writing. Looking at him, I thought he would be a great Andy Serkis and his ability to do great voices made this review a knockout review. Of course, it also allowed me to relive one of the funniest moments in Movie Award history. At the 2003 MTV Movie Awards, Andy was finishing up his work as Gollum in the Lord Of The Rings trilogy, and they did a bit in which Gollum/Smeagol and Andy were in the same room and dealing with the award. It was perfect parody fodder and Kent again had to go through hours of makeup to become the Gollum/Smeagol parody and we shot all the scenes of Kent in the full make up and then work backwards also helped that Kent is a great voice over artist. I truly can say he is the best at voice work and I thank him for being professional and letting me know how big a Jackass I can be.  

(Cut to "Andy Serkis" in full Gollum mode as he ends his cursing rant with James grabbing him and saying "Goodnight" and the reviews ends. Cut to the scene as it begins with a laser hitting a slab of Titanium as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as three shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As the three-run out of frame moving forward, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left, and John and Mike Santos and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left, and Olivia Horvath appears in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written and directed by James Faraci, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions” as it ends the Laser beam disappears and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appears. At the 0:32-0:36 mark, the word “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down, and James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into the frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. The Laser returns to cut out the Number)

James Faraci (Voiceover):
And The Number One Best moment of 2022 is...
(Cut to clips of the "The Top Ten Best Episodes of The Orville...So Far" as James does a voiceover)


James Faraci (Voiceover):
When I first saw the series, one thought came to mind. It felt like I was watching Seth MacFarland's take on those 1990s syndicated Star Trek series, and while yeah, it started off that way, it took a different direction and became the purest Sci-Fi Series I have ever seen. Once Fox gave it the boot after saying they'd give it a third season, Hulu gave it a last-second stay of execution, and the third season became one of the best in the entire series, I decided, much like with my fandom of "Life As A Mermaid," I figured I would celebrate the series' success throughout its run and unlike "Mermaid," "The Orville" looks to keep going and something tells me I am going to be another Top ten about the series further down the line. And I am looking forward to more from Seth and the cast of The Orville. I love celebrating success and call this series the best success Seth MacFarland has had, and I hope this success continues for several more seasons!

(Cut to James physically)

James Faraci:
What will 2023 bring me? Well, how about my tenth anniversary, for starters. Maybe some good news in developing my movie... (Air raid sirens blare) My god... It's happening! It's Really Happening! RUN! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES TO THE SHELTER! (James runs as he morphs off camera as the camera work becomes shaky, and James runs into everyone else as everyone starts to fear something wrong, James yells to them to head for the shelter in the basement! Everyone runs in, with James being the last guy in.)

TLOTA:
My god, we've done it! We've really done it! If this makes it out in any way, shape, or form, I have to say that I blame you for the end of the world! I'm James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans, and...I think it's for real this time! (Power flickers out)

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