Monday, March 31, 2014

Let's Play Skygard!

(Commercial Sting with of the American Gladiators first run's final season's ten seconds theme with James Standing next to Army Text saying The Last Of The Americans. Then a rubber stamp stamps over the entire thing the word Editorial)

TLOTA: I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. I've been kind of busy as of late what with my sword being stolen, searching for The Wicked and what have you not so getting out an editorial has been kind of hard. But that doesn't mean I can't do something, so I decided to post a "Let's Play" now I know that it might be hard to do seeing as how I write text reviews to post a "Let's Play" but I decided to give it with the good ol' College try. So let's check out "Skygard"! (James walks over to the XBOX 360, opens Disc drive places Disc into Disc drive and an error screen appears) Hmm. Not to worry (James walks over to his desk drawer and grabs two Sonic Screwdrivers) and a One & a two and an Allons-Y! (James hits the Television and XBOX 360 with the Sonic Screwdrivers and accidentally opens up a portal.) Uh-Oh! (Portal widens as James ducks for cover and Karl dressed as he was at the end of "Dragonbored" pops out)

Karl: I'm free! I'M FREE! (Karl shouts, whoops & hollers!) Who are you?

TLOTA: I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and you are?

Karl: Oh hey, I'm Karl and I'm from Chicago. I've been in there for a LOOONG time! I died five hundred times while I was in there.

TLOTA: Uh quick question, Do you usually dress like a Xena: Warrior Princess knockoff or was this part of being in Skygard? (Karl looks at himself and discovers he still looks like Jessica)

Karl: Shit! (Looks down at his crotch) Whew, got my junk back. I based this on my now Ex-Girlfriend Jessica who got stolen by me by that back stabbing Gnome fucker Jimbroth! Uh sorry but do you have any men's clothing! (Time lapses about an hour and Karl is dressed like an ordinary guy now.) Thanks. So now you know my story.

TLOTA: So you were just an ordinary guy with an ordinary job then you got into "Skygard" the game like a fan would then your copy acted like a portal and then your character Jimbroth came to our world, took your job, friends and the woman you loved?

Karl: Yep. I also found out Jessica and Jimbroth got married also LeBron made him a partner so after a while I went through the emotions but now that I'm out of "Skygard" I know what I'm going to do. First off, I'm going to find Taylin and put five hundred bullets into the bastard! One for every death he dealt me! Then I've got a merger proposal for LeBron, him and a pit full of half crazed cannibalistic hyenas! Finally I'm going to take Jimbroth's sword and shred him literally to fucking shreds then rape and skin Jessica alive after that I'll be able to play "Skygard" in peace and serenity! (Karl laughs manically and runs into the night as James prepares to play his copy of "Skygard" when he discovers his copy got stolen by Karl)

TLOTA: Oh SON OF A BITCH! He took my copy of "Skygard" Oh well, at least I gave it the ol' College try. I'm James Faraci The Last of the Americans and that's my opinion.  (Scene changes to classic "Looney Tunes" end scene with the music from classic "Looney Tunes" ending & James pops out of the drum) TLOTA: App a dap dap a APRIL FOOL'S! (The ending scene ends as James does a thumbs up)

Saturday, March 8, 2014

The Final bite from the "Spider"

ORAC (Audio Only): Previously on James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans.

(Show scene of James grabbing Spider-Man 3 and extreme pain courses through him)

Lea Michele: ORAC, what’s going on?
TLOTA (Sounding dark & demonic with his eyes glowing with black flames): Spider-Man 3 (Dark Spider-Man theme from Spider-Man 3 play in the background and James smiles a wicked grin.)
ORAC (Audio Only): And now the conclusion!

(Scene fades in to Lea Michele backing away from James to find a Sonic Screwdriver in a drawer only to use it on James as he demonically roars, returns to normal and collapses in exhaustion while Lea Michele feels a pinch from the Sonic Screwdriver)
Lea Michele: What happened?
ORAC: The scans of this particular Sonic Screwdriver has now genetically been locked to your specific DNA, in layman’s terms now you only can control this Sonic Screwdriver.
Lea Michele: But what happened to James?

ORAC: You knocked him unconscious.
Lea Michele: So what do I do?

(Music from the last seasons of the Original Run of American Gladiators play Speedy shot of James Faraci breaking through the American Flag, working out, fighting bad cinema, bad pop culture anything bad in the world with a picture of the White House appears in the background as Jack Swagger, Zeb Coulter and President Obama appear in the foreground as all three fall as James Faraci stands alone and tall and in Army text the words of The Last Of The Americans stand by his side)
(Opening cuts to Lea Michele carrying James Faraci to her car, pulling out her Sonic Screwdriver to unlock her doors, prop James in the passenger seat and use Sonic Screwdriver to start her car. Scene cuts to her zooming down Route 17 to New York City with a Bluetooth in her ear while “I Am the Doctor” by Murray Gold plays in the background)
Lea Michele: Call Rowdy.

Bluetooth: Please enjoy the music while you’re party is being reached. (“Good Ol’ Boys” Dukes of Hazzard theme and the Rowdy Reviewer answers)
Rowdy (Audio Only): Hello, how’s James?

Lea Michele: He was doing better until I blasted him with a Sonic Screwdriver.

Rowdy (Audio Only): WHY?!

Lea Michele: His voice became demonic and his eyes turned black and flames came out of them when he said “Spider-Man 3” but I couldn’t leave him where he was and because of it I might be late for “GLEE” I heard you have a Genie, can your Genie get me a half hour away from the set.
Rowdy (Audio Only): No Problem, where are you now?

Lea Michele: Heading down Route 17 to Middletown New York.
Rowdy (Audio Only): Okay, hang on tight! Jeannie, lock into Lea’s car and blink her to the set of “GLEE”! (Cut to Lea’s car going down Route 17 to Middletown New York to disappear then cut to outside the set of “GLEE” where Lea Michele’s car blinks in as she hits the brakes)

Lea Michele: WOW! (Tap on window cut to outside of Lea’s car where Naya Rivera is standing. Car door opens and Lea steps out)
Naya Rivera: Lea, where have you been, I hope you’re ready because… (Naya looks in Lea’s Car to see James’ unconscious body.) TELL ME HE’S NOT!

Lea Michele: Fortunately, he’s just unconscious, help me load him into my trailer. (Naya grabs James by his arms while Lea grabs James’ Legs and pulls out the Sonic Screwdriver to open Lea’s trailer then cut to James lying unconscious on Lea’s Trailer’s bed)
Naya Rivera: Will he be alright?

Lea Michele: I don’t know (Naya looks at Lea’s right hand and in it is the Sonic Screwdriver) & this is a Sonic Screwdriver, it’s encoded to work with me only. (Assistant bangs on the door and says “You’re wanted on set in five minutes Ms. Michele”) Damn it! Fortunately, I’ve remembered my lines. (Lea bends over to James’ unconscious body and gives him a kiss on the cheek) Get better while I’m away. (Cut to inside of James’ head where James Faraci is standing inside his head and dark clouds surround him.)

James Faraci: Where am I? What are you? (A Figure in the darkness pulls out a Sonic Screwdriver and dark clouds inside James’ head screams as the sounds of a Sonic Screwdriver run through and dissipate the dark clouds into harmless fog) What’s going on? Hey you with the Sonic Screwdriver, Who are you? (Figure walks towards James only to reveal himself to be James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans)
TLOTA (Sporting a British Accent): Hello, I am the doctor.

James Faraci: Bullshit. (James Faraci the Last of the Americans laughs and then sighs then sounds like James.)
TLOTA: You’re right, I just wanted to say that. I am you, but not what you think of as your subconscious, I am an extension of you. Much like The Nostalgia Critic is an extension of Doug Walker or how “The Blockbuster Buster” is the extension of Eric Rodriguez or how The Rowdy Reviewer is an extension of your friend Chris Lee Moore or Linkara is the extension of Lewis Lovhaug. I’m your extension. I am James Faraci The Last Of The Americans.

James Faraci: Okay so what about why my memories became Swiss cheese or what those dark clouds were?
TLOTA: Your mind didn’t want handle the loss, the pain and the anguish of the last six years so you tucked it away until it became a part of you, the part you didn’t want to deal with, that’s why you & I chose the Spider-Man movies by Sam Raimi, to remind you of what one of the catalysts was to make me. (Show clips from the first two of the three Spider-Man movies by Sam Raimi with The Last Of The Americans doing a voice over) The first movie was a reminder that your faith in movies needed to be revived. The second one was the one that shook your faith in how Hollywood made movies. (Cut to James & The Last Of The Americans inside James’ head.) But the one we’re going to face now is the one that destroyed that faith that Hollywood can make consistently great movies into realizing Hollywood wants to make the quick buck. Spider-Man 3 (Show Spider-Man 3 opening credit then clips of Spider-Man 3) This is the one movie that you were nervous the most about, because there was so much hype behind it, so much to wonder and that hype & wonder turned you against the Wall Crawler when you came to that realization. (Cut back to James & The Last Of The Americans inside James’ head.) Plus with him like a Jackass revealing himself in the midst of Marvel’s Civil War, One More Day then his association with Obama made you hate Spider-Man for good and good reason.

James Faraci: But how can this be one of the catalysts for why I made you? We’re going to sit through this together to find out aren’t we?
TLOTA: You betcha (Cut to Opening scene with The Last Of The Americans & James Faraci doing a voice over the clips) So the movie begins with Spider-Man being beloved by all, Peter and Mary Jane are happy as their lives are moving forward, so much so Mary Jane is in the next big musical. (Show clip of Mary Jane singing and cut to James & The Last Of The Americans with a disgusted look on both their faces)

James Faraci: Wow, if she was on American Idol she’d never make it past the audition round. But wait a minute, what about Harry?
TLOTA: He’s been planning his unnecessary revenge. (Show clips of evolution of Goblin masks & Gliders and then Harry coming out of the Performance enhancers’ inhalation chamber. Then back to both James & TLOTA doing voice over video clips.)Of course sneaking up behind Peter helped Harry out in the battle.

Harry Osborn: You knew this was coming, Pete!

James Faraci (Voice over video clips): The fact Peter tells Harry the truth doesn’t seem to faze Harry’s dogged determination to put Peter in a pine box but after some cognitive recalibration Harry wakes up in the Hospital having no memory of what happened to him or his father.
TLOTA (Voice over video clips):  Meanwhile on a date with Mary Jane the Venom Symbiote finds its way to earth and on to Peter’s bike and Flint Marko played by Thomas Hayden Church breaks out of Jail to see his sick daughter & ex-wife but on the run Flint Marko runs into a science experiment involving sand caught in the experiment forcing his body to be reduced to grains of sand, the next morning Flint Marko begins to rebuild himself after being reduced to sand and to the movie’s credit the scene where he sees what happened to him and he tries to pick up his daughter’s necklace is sad but he realizes he’s become “The Sandman”. Meanwhile Peter visits Aunt May at her new apartment to let May know he’s going to ask M.J. to marry Peter meanwhile Mary Jane’s career takes a hit as critics hate her performance and she’s summarily fired from the Broadway show she was in. Ouch!

James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Meanwhile at a Photo shoot we meet Gwen Stacey played by Bryce Dallas Howard, which gets cut off via a crane crash but fortunately Captain Stacey played by James Cromwell aka the farmer from both “Babe” movies and of course Zefram Cochrane from “Star Trek: First Contact” shuts the power down to the block but that doesn’t help but thankfully Spider-Man is there to save Gwen and meet Topher Grace who plays…
Eddie Brock: It’s Brock, sir. Edward Brock Jr. (Scene cuts to James & TLOTA inside James’ mind)

James Faraci: Do you want to say it or should I?
TLOTA: Let’s say it together.

James Faraci: Sounds good.

James Faraci & TLOTA (Together): BULLSHIT!

TLOTA: Look I get that they had to get someone somewhat physically equal to Tobey Maguire but Foreman from “That 70’s Show”?
James Faraci: I could’ve done a better Eddie Brock with my eyes closed. (Ground shakes and things become a bit darker.) What was that?

TLOTA: You haven’t dealt with it but trust me it’s not good. (Scene cuts to Jane Lynch looking into Lea Michele’s trailer to see James’ unconscious body)
Jane Lynch (Internal Monologue): Hmm, it’s him. His existence is an affront to all that I stand for. He looks like he’s unable to defend himself. Perfect (Show Jane Lynch with an evil smile on her face and a dark intent on her mind. Commercial Sting going out with of the American Gladiators first run's final season's ten seconds theme with James Standing next to Army Text saying The Last Of The Americans. Then same commercial sting takes us back to the review.)

(Cut back to both James & TLOTA inside James’ head.)
TLOTA: All right, everything’s stabilized for now. Whatever you said or did, don’t do it again!

James Faraci: I’ll take that into advisement.
(Cut back to both James & TLOTA doing voice over video clips.)

TLOTA(Voice over video clips): Meanwhile The Daily Bugle has seen its sales go down, J. Jonah Jameson’s stress levels being used for comedic purposes and a new job for a staff photographer up for grabs and it’s between Peter & Eddie. But apparently saving a Police Captain’s daughter earns Spidey the key to the city.
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): During the ceremony Gwen & Spider-Man kiss that Iconic kiss from the franchise despite the crowd’s negative reaction of it (Show scene of Little kid saying “No Spider-Man No!” and Gwen Kisses Spider-Man with Spider-Man upside down then show Mary Jane getting pissed off and then Spider-Man gives the thumbs down but turns it to thumbs up and the little kid going Blach! Then scene cuts to James & TLOTA inside James’ head.)

James Faraci: I don’t know whether to agree with Spidey’s first hand gesture or that kid.
TLOTA: Why not both?

James Faraci: Sounds good to me (Both giving the moment the Thumbs Down and saying BLACH! Cut back to both James & TLOTA doing voice over video clips.)
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): However in Mid-Ceremony, The Sandman makes his first appearance in sight of Spider-Man. The two fight for a bit inside an armored truck but The Sandman gets away with the cash and Peter is left to wonder where guys like The Sandman comes from.

Peter Parker: Where do all these guys come from?
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Told ya.

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): Well Peter’s romantic night where he’s going to propose goes south because A) Mary Jane is still pissed about Spidey kissing Gwen and B) She tells Peter about being fired from her Broadway show & C) Gwen Stacey drops by definitely not good timing by Gwen or Peter & Mary Jane. But the moment is saved by Bruce Campbell doing an Inspector Clouseau impression as the MaĆ®tre D and to Bruce’s credit his Clouseau is better than Steve Martin’s in those embarrassing two movies.
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Making things worse Captain Stacey tells both Aunt May & Peter that apparently the thief that got away with the Pro-Wrestling organization’s money that Peter was at that night where Uncle Ben was murdered wasn’t Uncle Ben’s murderer it was The Sandman (Show clip of Robot Chicken’s M. Night Shyamalan saying “What a twist!”)

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): Peter takes the news rather well for Peter that is.
Peter Parker: No, you’re not doing your job. I watched my Uncle die and we chased down the wrong man. Now you’re telling me you had suspicions for two years? Witnesses? Why weren’t we told about this?

Captain Stacey: Settle down
Peter Parker: I have no intention of settling down! This man killed my uncle and he’s still out there!

(Scene cuts to James & TLOTA inside James’ head)
James Faraci: Good lord, any more of that whining and he’ll make Robin from “Batman & Robin” sound butch in comparison.

(Cut back to both James & TLOTA doing voice over video clips.)
TLOTA (Voice over video clips): Well as one would suspect Peter is waiting for the Police Scanner for it to call that the Sandman is around. But all that pent up rage interests the Symbiote as it merges with Spider-Man giving Spidey his Dark Spider-Man suit. Peter not totally being rock stupid takes a sample of it to Dr. Connors to see what it is.

James Faraci (Voice over video clips): But no time to wait for Dr. Connors’ test results Peter hears on the Police Scanner that The Sandman has been seen at a bank and puts on the Dark Spider-Man suit to take on The Sandman. (Show clip of Dark Spider-Man in the subway with The Sandman)
Dark Spider-Man: Flint Marko!

Sandman: What do you want from me?
Dark Spider-Man: Remember Ben Parker? The old man you shot down in cold blood?

Sandman: What does it matter to you, anyway?
Dark Spider-Man: EVERYTHING!

James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Its official, Robin from “Batman & Robin” is more butch than Spider-Man. But having said that, the battle in the subway is well choreographed. (Show clip of Sandman falling in a puddle and beginning to disintegrate and Dark Spider-Man opens up the water main fully disintegrating Sandman with Dark Spider-Man saying “Good Riddance” then cut to James & TLOTA inside James’ head)
James Faraci: Looks like Spider-Man sent The Sandman (James & TLOTA take off their glasses and put on fashionable shades) to sleep at the bottom of the Hudson river (Show clip of CSI Miami intro where Roger Daltrey shouts eyeahh! And opening scene then cut back to James & TLOTA doing voiceover video clips)

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): While the symbiote appears to slowly begin to take control of Peter. Mary Jane gets a singing waitress’s job at a bar and Harry and Mary Jane get together for a friendly get together which gets a little more than that and unfortunately reactivates Harry’s dormant memories and Harry begins to plot against Spider-Man again this time using Mary Jane as a pawn.
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Definitely not good seeing as how Peter is not fully there and the symbiote has some control over him and the battle doesn’t fare well for either (Show clips of the fight between Peter & Harry then Peter mocking Harry intercut with clips of The Nostalgia Critic whining over Robin from “Batman & Robin” then cut back to Harry throwing a smart bomb towards Peter which Peter throws back at Harry as it goes kablamo.) The next day The Daily Bugle shows a doctored photo Eddie Brock made which pisses Peter off. Peter decides to find the original and show it to Jameson which gets Eddie fired and Peter the Staff Photographer job and finally Dr. Connors discovers that the symbiote is dangerous but we don’t have time for that. We’ve got the Symbiote fully in charge of Peter Parker causing chaos as the Spider-Man movie franchise finally shoots itself in the foot. (Show Peter Parker dancing & being an arrogant prick eventually hurting Mary Jane in the process then cut to James & TLOTA inside James’ head)

James Faraci: I think it’s safe to say Sam Raimi should thank his Lucky stars that he was able to get work after this.
TLOTA: I think he does.

(Cut back to both James & TLOTA doing voice over video clips.)
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): But that moment Peter realizes the symbiote is in the driver seat is when he decides to try to get rid of it using the vibrations of a church bell.

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): Well which church bell could it be? Why the same church bell where Eddie is praying for God to axe Peter Parker.
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Like he would do anything like that.

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): But then again God does favor the wicked and punish the good because the symbiote finds a new host in Eddie Brock and with the symbiote armed with Spider-Man’s abilities the two become VENOM!
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Meanwhile The Sandman reforms himself and teams up with Venom just to kidnap Mary Jane. Knowing he can’t do this on his own he begs Harry to help but after nearly being incinerated by Spidey, Harry tells Spidey to piss off. Eventually the truth about Harry’s dad FINALLY gets through Harry’s thick skull and who tells him that, The Butler, THE FUCKING BUTLER! The guy who had a total of less than one minute total in the Spider-Man franchise combined, I think Bruce Campbell had more screen time & he played three different characters. However Harry’s involvement to help Spider-Man came not a moment too soon as both Venom & Sandman puts the walloping to Spidey and just as you thought Spider-Man dancing and acting like an arrogant prick didn’t put the Spider-Man franchise down like a dog I think hardcore Spider-Man fans know that a Goblin and Spider-Man have not nor have they ever worked side by side, but thankfully it doesn’t last long. (Show clip of Harry being stabbed by his own glider then cut to scene of Maid Marian from “Robin Hood: Men in Tights” reacting to the Sheriff of Rottenham getting stabbed then back to Spider-Man 3 clips) Eventually Peter uses vibrations to separate Venom & Eddie Brock then bombs both the Symbiote & Eddie Brock straight to hell along with the Spider-Man franchise and the final confrontation between Peter & The Sandman finally occurs where The Sandman tells Peter that the gun going off was accidental and Peter’s Uncle’s death was accidental but it’s still technically murder but Peter forgives The Sandman and Harry dies.

Peter Parker (Narrating): Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside of us, we always have a choice. My friend Harry taught me that. He chose to be the best of himself. It’s the choices that makes us who we are and we can always choose to do what’s right.
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Unless you’re the filmmakers who give us an ending where Peter watches Mary Jane at the Bar she’s working at & where he humiliated her earlier.

TLOTA (Voice over video clips): What did you expect a heroic ending when Peter & Spider-Man was acting like a Jackass throughout the whole movie?
James Faraci (Voice over video clips): Point taken

(Show ending of Spider-Man 3 then cut to James & TLOTA inside James’ head)
James Faraci: So do you want to say it or should I?

TLOTA: How about we do it together?
James Faraci: Sounds good to me.

James Faraci & TLOTA (Together): THIS MOVIE WAS HORRENDOUS! (Show clips of Spider-Man 3 while James & TLOTA doing voice over clips.)
TLOTA (Voice over video clips): The story was rushed faster than Sonic the Hedgehog in super turbo mode, the CGI can go from decent to obviously bad and outside of Sam Raimi & James Franco the path of career destruction is equal to that of three movies starring Shia LaBeouf. But to Spider-Man 3’s very little credit there were some decent moments and though the story was rushed, I believe that Sam Raimi somewhere in the back of his head believed that this was going to be his last Hurrah as the man behind The Spider-Man movies so he threw everything he wanted and the one thing the fans wanted which was Venom but when it got rushed fans did get upset but when you throw everything including the Kitchen sink into something you kind of have to look back and wonder what happened.

James Faraci (Voice over video clips): But that was also a bit of a problem with the first two as well Sam Raimi threw everything he could and what could work did work but everything else was lackluster and that’s a shame Sam Raimi made one of my favorite movies of all time “Army Of Darkness” and before I get a ton of E-Mails and messages I have seen the other two Evil Dead movies and they were amazing, the remake eh not so much. But for all intent and purposes the fact that this had to carry a brand that was not doing well at all and this was just another nail in the coffin. (Scene cuts to James & TLOTA inside James’ head.)
James Faraci: And to compound matters is I could make a better story for a movie franchise like Spider-Man. But I never got that break, in fact I never got anything close to a break for me and my goals, my hopes & my desires and I need to know one thing.
TLOTA: What’s that?

James Faraci (Shouting in anger): WHY?! (The word why echoes which shakes the ground inside James’ head re-releasing the darkness that James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans had held at bay.)
TLOTA: Why did you reawaken it?

James Faraci: I have no idea and I don’t know what “IT” is.

TLOTA: Well, I’ll tell you this right now it ain’t Tim Curry! (Ground shakes harder as the darkness starts to change as Scene cuts to with Chris Colfer enjoying a bite to eat from the Craft Service table and sees Lea Michele running towards Chris as he shouts WHOA! As Lea collides with Chris.)
Chris Colfer: Lea, what’s wrong?

Lea Michele: Jane. James trouble gonna die!
Chris Colfer: You’re going fifty five times faster than usual, what’s wrong? (Naya Rivera shouts off screen “GANGWAY!”  As she comes barreling after Lea Michele and collides with Chris & Lea) Naya, what is Lea going on about?

Naya Rivera: Remember the Halloween Karaoke get together & the New Year’s Eve party we all had.
Chris Colfer: Yeah, who else was there?

Lea Michele: JAMES!
Chris Colfer: Who? (Thinks for two seconds) Oh the guy who is that “Last Of The Americans” reviewer guy online. What’s going on with him?

Naya Rivera: Jane Lynch has the keys to Lea’s Trailer. Jane has had it out for James since she heard of him and if we can’t get to Lea’s trailer before Jane does James is going to join Cory.
(Chris Colfer’s eyes expand as the three run out of the set as scene cuts to James lying down in Lea’s bed as “Vale Decem” plays in the foreground as Jane looks in disgust of James and grabs a chef’s knife. Scene cuts to back inside James’ mind as ground stops rumbling dark clouds take physical form and takes shape of Christy Romano. James walks up to it)

James Faraci: I know what that is, it’s my past.
TLOTA: Why keep it around? It’ll keep you where you are. Don’t you deserve a future?

(James ponders that thought as scene cuts to Lea Michele, Naya Rivera & Chris Colfer running in slow motion trying to get to Lea’s trailer at 00:54-01:30 of “Vale Decem” as scene cuts to Jane Lynch ready to kill James as he lies in unconsciousness.)

Jane Lynch: To kill you will be for the greater good!
(Scene cuts to Naya, Chris & Lea Michele running while Lea pulls out her Sonic Screwdriver at 01:45 moment of “Vale Decem” and scene cuts to Jane Lynch hovering over James’ body.)

Jane Lynch: From Hell’s heart, I stab at thee! (Scene cuts to Lea Michele using the Sonic Screwdriver to pull off the door to her trailer then cuts back to Jane Lynch with Chef’s knife over James’ midsection) For hate’s sake, I spit my last breath at thee! (Cut to inside James’ head where James, TLOTA & His past.)
TLOTA: You must let it go. I can help you the only way you know how. (Pulls out the Sword of Caliverti and hands it to James at 02:00 mark of “Vale Decem” as James continues to ponder then James has a determined look on his face and with the sword in hand at 02:05 mark of “Vale Decem”. By 02:08 mark of “Vale Decem” scene cuts to Lea’s trailer as Naya, Chris & Lea shout “JANE!”  And Jane Lynch turns around with the Chef’s knife By 02:15 mark of “Vale Decem” scene cuts back to James & TLOTA inside James’ head and James looking as if he’s made a decision.)

James Faraci: I know what I have to do. (Shouts in anger As James turns and stabs TLOTA through his midsection at 02:22 mark of “Vale Decem”)I knew something was off. You are the wicked, you thought you could control me by making me destroy what I can’t get rid of and I will not give into you.  I banish you forever! (TLOTA screams NO!  demonically at 02:40 mark of “Vale Decem” & James strikes the floor of his head at Scene cuts back to James’ head at 02:47 mark of “Vale Decem” as James hits the floor inside his head and blinding light blocks all and at 02: 53 mark of “Vale Decem” scene cuts to James as he reawakens with his eyes turning white and electricity shoots from James’ eyes  he stands up and everything on James becomes the bluish white light like in Quantum Leap while electricity courses through him to knock Jane Lynch off her feet and Lea looks as James’s clothes change to tan work boots, Blue jeans and a Black tee shirt with The American Flag on it and bluish white light fades to see James look just like he did as Jane Lynch wakes up to see the new James Faraci as “Words win wars” play in the background.)
Jane Lynch: OH CRAP! You’re back!

TLOTA: And better than ever.
Chris Colfer:  Wha..How..Huh?

Naya Rivera: What happened?
TLOTA: I’m Red Blooded, White with fury and I’m damned proud to be Blue Collared.

Lea Michele: James?
TLOTA: That’s right Lea, it’s me and I’m not going anywhere. (Lea, Jane, Naya & Chris look at James as he heroically poses and all four of them tilt their head in bemusement.)  I am James Faraci & I am The Last Of The Americans. (Jane, Naya, Chris & Lea are looking at James as if he grew a second head while he looks at his new threads)Like the look? (James gives a smile as scene cuts to James looking at the sunset on a hill as “Corynorhinus” from Batman Begins plays in the foreground as Lea Michele walks up next to him at 00:22 mark of “Corynorhinus” from Batman Begins.)

Lea Michele: So everything is?
TLOTA: Back to normal? Yeah, pretty much. I see you’ve become proficient with your Sonic Screwdriver, but after everything I’ve been through, I can’t ask you to stay with me. (The two of them look at each other in silence at the 00:50-01:12 mark of “Corynorhinus” from Batman Begins as a tear wells in Lea’s eyes and James wipes them away as gently as he can)

Lea Michele: So what our lives just go on and I forget that you were in my life?
TLOTA: No, just do what you’re doing now and have faith that we’ll be together soon. But for now… (James kisses Lea on her lips at 01:59-02:29 mark of “Corynorhinus” from Batman Begins.) Goodbye. (James walks away from Lea at 02:31-02:52 mark of “Corynorhinus” from Batman Begins when Lea runs to James and the two fall together down the hill and sweeping romanticized version of the opening theme from the 1990’s X-Men cartoon from “The Phoenix Saga” play as Lea & James kiss again)

Lea Michele: You are THE best thing since I lost Cory, you made me laugh when I needed it and damn it I need you now, forget what you think about why we shouldn’t be together and think why we should be together and I know you’ll come to the same conclusion as I did.
TLOTA: I never thought that it this could happen. But if you’re willing to do this, so am I (Lea smiles then James smiles and the two kiss again as the scene fade cuts to James’ room and the two are in mid conversation.) And that’s why I hunt deer, it’s not Bambi I’m after. It’s Bambi saying “That one is too dumb to…” (James notices the keys to the vault out on the desk.) Why are the keys to the vault out on the desk? ORAC! (James Grabs keys and ORAC to then scene cuts to the backroom then accesses the entry panel to the vault.) Lea, I’ve got a lot to explain, I know it but this is an emergency. ORAC access the last entry time after the P.H. incident. Lea, it’s a long drop down. Hang on. (James turns the keys the same way to activate a nuclear bomb and elevator drops the two down to the vault.) You okay? (Lea looks at herself in a reflective surface and sees her hair is like the Bride of Frankenstein but quickly shakes her hair back to normal)

Lea Michele: Nothing I couldn’t handle. (The two walk down a hallway to entry door as James access the entry door.)
TLOTA: Okay, the ring and gem from the gauntlet are here. The locket is still in its case. So that leaves… ORAC!

ORAC: Yes James.
TLOTA: Send two messages to everyone. The first one is to let everyone know, the wicked has been unleashed.

ORAC: And the second (Show empty sword sheath.)
TLOTA(Audio only): The sword is in play!