(Scene starts in a theater lobby where a man is walking down
throwing Michael Bay produced movies before cutting to a photo shopped cut
image of Michael Bay’s head on James’ body walks down before a red circle with
a diagonal line lands right him making the Ghost from the “Ghostbusters”
portion of the insignia of the “Ghostbusters” before a crowd shouts
“MOVIEBUSTERS!” before cutting to the Main Lobby of James’ Studio as James is
taking it easy in his Ghostbusters outfit before cutting to The Receptionist
played by Brenda Zamora-Fonseca as she picks up the phone and the earphone
becomes the size of her head. She soon presses the “Easy” button from “Staples”
which sets off the alarm Klaxon which makes James fall over cartoonish-like before
cutting to Eric, Paulo, Rebecca & Mike working on something when they hear
the alarm before cutting to Nick, John, Renee, Eliza and Traci in the kitchen
trying to take a bite to eat when they drop their food on the table when they
hear the alarm before heading to A Van and before Paulo enters he gives his
wife a kiss on the lips before James’ hand pulls him into the van as the Ecto-1
klaxons blare before cutting to the Theater Lobby as posters from bad movies
and every actor Hollywood hates is seen trampling around before cutting to Team
TLOTA prep their proton packs then cutting to Shia LaBeouf Screaming like his
usual annoying self before seeing Proton Streams come from Team TLOTA’s Proton
Packs capture all of them before cutting to a trap vacuuming up all of them
then cutting to James picking up the trap and giving the team the thumbs up
before swish cutting to the Moviebusters as a sparkle of white light comes up
under the logo and pops out the word “And…” all while Phelous sings with the
instrumental of The Real Ghostbusters.)
Phelous (Singing): If there’s Something strange in the
theater, who are you going to call?
Team TLOTA: MOVIEBUSTERS!
Phelous (Singing): If it’s something so bad that it ain’t no
good, who are you going to call?
Team TLOTA: MOVIEBUSTERS!
Phelous (Singing): I ain’t afraid of no Bay! I ain’t afraid
of no Bay!
Phelous (Singing): Who are you going to call?
Team TLOTA: MOVIEBUSTERS!
Phelous (Singing): Who are you going to call?
Team TLOTA: MOVIEBUSTERS!
(A Hand pulling a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the
statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the
Robo Knight Robo Morpher and punching in the code 428 from the 0:00-0:03 mark
from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:04
mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows James
Faraci morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans with his Long
sleeve Tee-Shirt with the American flag design on it, Blue cargo Jeans and Tan
Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American
Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James stocking up on his arsenal from
the Classic Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Morpher, a bandoleer stocked up with
Sonic Screwdrivers, Ammunition for a 303 British Rifle and said rifle, The Ring
Of Aeon, The Gem From the Gauntlet Malachite’s Hand, Emmalina’s amulet and the
Sword Of Caliverti from 0:08-0:15 mark from the theme from the final season of
American Gladiators. 0:15-0:29 mark from the theme from the final season of
American Gladiators original run shows James leaping and running through
moments from the 2015 calendar year of his reviews ranging from James landing
on Linkara, to James getting his nards smashed, To Josie & The Pussycats
running into James’ office, to James and Paulo dressed as the Mario Brothers on
a snow sled, to Everyone at team TLOTA running out of James’ office, to James
leading the charge against the Cullens and the vampires of The Twilight Saga,
to Rowdy turning his head to Paulo with a demented smile on his face as
everyone save for James looks scared as James has his right hand with defeat on
his face until the 0:30 mark from the theme from the final season of American
Gladiators shows when James pulls out a sonic screwdriver towards the Power
Rangers then cuts over to a slab of titanium where lasers cut out “The Last Of
The Americans” until 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American
Gladiators original run when James lands on top of the slab while doing a
heroic pose with Paulo Fonseca, John Santos, Eliza Dushku & Eric Kurtzke on
his right and Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Traci Hines, Renee Miller and Mike
Santos on his left doing their own heroic poses on a black background the
0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators
original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with
the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James dressed as
a Ghostbuster in his office)
TLOTA: I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the
views I’m about to express are that of my own and some of yours. Guys, I’ve
always believed that certain rules must be kept in order to keep balance in
this nutty world of ours and then there are times when the rules must be
broken. This is one of the times when the rules must break as I talk about a
movie which as of this moment is still in theaters, that’s right the 2016 movie
that calls itself “Ghostbusters” or as it’s been called lately by the other
title “Ghostbusters Answer The Call”. (Cut to clips recreated by Team TLOTA
mixed with stills from the actual movie as well as clips from the 1984 classic
as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): And while some in our profession has decided NOT to
talk about it. I think it’d be a bigger crime to ignore it entirely because
there are moments in which needs to be discussed, characters that need to be
addressed and I feel it cannot be swept under the rug. Will it be as awesome as
the Original Movies or will it wind up making me miss the worst episodes of
“The Real Ghostbusters”. (Cut to James
physically.)
TLOTA: And before I forget there’s something I’ve got to
warn everyone about, it starts with an “S”. Swim? Skin? Swami? Salami? Slippy?
Slappy? Shemp? Simmons? Swans? Swansong? Svenson? Swanson? Stallion? Stallone?
Segal? Samsonite? Soil? Sailers? (Cut to a clip from Doctor Who episode “Let’s
Kill Hitler” in which River Song asks “Spoilers?” before cutting to James
physically)
TLOTA: That’s the word I’m looking for, Thanks River! This
is “Ghostbusters: Answer The Call” (James opens up a can of Ecto-Cooler only
for James to spit it out after taking a sip before cutting to recreated clips
from the movie as performed by Team TLOTA as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): So our movie begins at Columbia
University where Tenured Professor Dr. Erin Gilbert played by Kristen Wiig is
asked by an owner of a haunted house to investigate it because of a book her
and an associate of hers named Dr. Abby Yates played by Melissa McCarthy which
was written then published and put on sale at Amazon which puts her Tenure at
the University in Jeopardy.
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): This is not good, if
the Dean sees this I’m fired! Where is she?!
TLOTA (Voiceover): Erin finds her old associate with a
technical wizard by the name of Holtzmann played by Kate McKinnon at a lesser
accredited university and spills about the haunted house.
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): So, here’s the deal,
I’ll let you and Holtzmann join me in this exploration of this haunted house,
you recall all the copies of this book AND destroy all the copies you haven’t
sold.
Abby Yates (Played by Olivia Horvath): Sounds good to me.
Where’s my Wonton soup? Oh well come Holtzmann, let’s do it!
Holtzmann (Played by Traci Hines): I’ll bring the deadly
explosive weapons!
TLOTA (Voiceover): Yeah, Holtzmann is off, but she is off in
a good way! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: And Okay, let’s get this out of the way as well. I
Actually liked the Ghostbusters in this movie! (Cut to stills of the original
Ghostbusters and their counterparts in the recent movie as James does a
voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): There was an opportunity for them to just
be cheap knockoffs of Peter Venkman, Raymond Stanz, Egon Spengler and Winston Zeddemore.
But I give credit to the actresses who played these characters their just dues
for bringing their own personalities to what could’ve been flat out knock-offs
and for me it’s kind of refreshing. (Cut to Eliza Dushku in her Ghostbusters
uniform at the doorway at James’ office)
Eliza Dushku: Hey James, we got a problem! (Cut to James)
TLOTA: It’s always something! (Cut to the meninists protesting
the new Ghostbusters movie outside of James’ front door before cutting to James
and Eliza standing there in dull bemusement.)
TLOTA: What are you chuckleheads up to?
Meninist #1 (Played by Nick Yaun): YOU CAN’T JUDGE THIS
MOVIE BY THE QUALITY OF THE CHARACTERS, THEY’RE WOMEN!
Meninst #2 (Played by Mike Santos): WE TRIED TO THREATEN
SONY TO REMOVE THE MOVIE BECAUSE THEY WERE WOMEN. WE DID THE SAME THING KIM
JONG-UN DID BUT THEY JUST LOOKED AT US AS IF WE WERE NUTS! BUT THEY DON’T
UNDERSTAND WOMEN RUIN EVERYTHING, LIKE THEY DID IN MAD MAX AND NOW THE GHOSTBUSTERS.
Meninist #3 (Played by Eric Kurtzke): YEAH! (Cut to James
& Eliza)
Eliza Dushku: You know something I figured out what’s wrong
with you. You virgins never even touched a woman or let a woman touch you and
do you know why? Because you are weak and pathetic! James is a real man. Not
because he’s a Conservative Republican, it’s because he’s a decent human and if
I do this… (Eliza kisses James) he reacts accordingly with the smile on his
face and if I do this… (Eliza smacks James on the behind) his reaction is a
normal one OR if I do this… (Cut to the meninists reacting as James reacts with
different noises ending with a “YOWZA!” before cutting to a content James and
Eliza pulling the zipper up on her Ghostbusters uniform) Notice the smile on
James’ face, because unlike you crying complaining jack-asses he EARNED that
through the hard work and sacrifice of what he does and who he is. So you know
what, let me get a few of my friends over here and they’ll set you straight,
come James you have a review to do.
TLOTA (sounding goofy): Duh Okay! (James chuckles as he
walks in before cutting to the meninists looking at one another.)
Meninst #1: Did you see what she did to him and how he just
stood there and took it? Isn’t he worried she might carry the Zika Virus!
Meninst #2: She’s totally ruined his life, just the way
women ruin everything.
Meninst #3: Yeah! (Cut to clips from the movie as performed
by Team TLOTA as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): So after getting slimed and the video of
the encounter put on the internet, it’s pretty much the end of her career.
The Dean of Columbia University (Played by James Faraci):
This pop bunk science is something this university cannot be associated with.
Therefor as of this moment ipso facto you are relieved from your position.
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): But I’ve got tenure!
The Dean of Columbia University (Played by James Faraci):
You have got nothing and don't bother your friends for they too have been fired from their lesser accredited universities so as of this moment, You're Screwed. Now if you'll excuse me I'll have security escort you out of here
whilst I laugh at women who are under the misguided belief that they are
important, laugh at the claims about how many female students are getting raped
by our male students and enjoy my Earl Grey.
(The Dean chuckles as Erin moves the desk aside and kicks the Dean in the Po-pos!)
TLOTA (Voiceover): So after the three were fired for their
video, they decide to open up the “Department of the Metaphysical Examination”
meanwhile MTA worker Patty Tolan played by Leslie Jones is doing her job when
she notices someone a little south of sound mind.
Rowan North (Played by John Ross Santos): This world will
perish in a sea of death and I shall open the flood gates and rule over the
dead!
Patty (Played by Renee Miller): Boy you are not right in the
head! Hey where are you going? (Patty follows Rowan only to see the device that
enhances ghosts’ abilities and a ghost appears and Patty runs like hell out of
dodge screaming all the way!)
TLOTA (Voiceover): After that happens we find our three
doctors setting up a temporary office on the second floor of a Chinese
Restaurant when Patty tells them about the Ghost she saw and the three decide
to test out their Proton Containment ray. (Cut to James Physically)
TLOTA: And Again, this is where I give the movie credit,
where credit is due. (Cut to a still of the Proton Pack from the Original and
the 2016 movie)
TLOTA (Voiceover): In the original, we’re shown the final
design of the Proton Pack, we were never privy as to how many failed attempts
in making the Proton Packs there were so to see that the new movie tests their
Unlicensed Nuclear Accelerators in order to make it safe to use is a smart move!
(Cut to recreated clips from the movie as performed by Team TLOTA as James does
a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Any way after nearly capturing the ghost
only for the device to be destroyed and the ghost is sent to Queens. Patty
joins them and they hire a Good looking receptionist played by Chris Hemsworth
who’s not exactly that good at what he supposed to do.
Kevin (Dressed as Thor and Played by Nick Yaun):
Ghostbusters central!
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): We’re the… (Erin
looks into Kevin’s eyes and melts) Whoever you say we are.
Patty (Audio only by Renee Miller): Okay, let’s get that
girl away from the hunky honkey! (Patty, Holtzmann & Abby drag Erin away.)
Kevin (Dressed as Thor and Played by Nick Yaun): Uh listen
there’s a device like the one Patty saw at a rock concert and…
Abby Yates (Played by Olivia Horvath): GRAB SOME SOUP AND
LET’S GET GOING!
TLOTA (Voiceover): So they load up their equipment and get
to the Rock Concert and… OKAY! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: Let’s talk about the effects, Okay throughout most of
the effect shots in the battles with the Ghosts are at best pretty average CGI
for a Scooby Doo Live Action movie but when they’re mixed Practical effects it
actually doesn’t look that bad especially in the final battle with the Ghosts.
(Cut to stills of the effects from the original Ghostbusters and the effects
from recent movie as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): The reason the Ghosts and the effects
from the Proton Packs and Trap have aged well is because they were able to test
the limits of what they could do with what they had. But the more advanced CGI
doesn’t mean squat if you don’t have the right people working with the right
capabilities to know when to use the human body to assist in making it feel
real if it's done wrong then you’re in Sharknado territory. (Cut to recreated clips from the movie as
performed by Team TLOTA as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): But I digress, the fearless female
foursome stops the ghost that would’ve possibly hurt everyone and are soon
greeted by… (Show the Bill Murray Cameo as done by Mike Santos.) Yeah, one last
stop before the break. (Cut to stills of the Cast of the Original Ghostbusters
in their cameos in the new Ghostbusters movie then stills of Harold Ramis and
Rick Moranis as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Seeing a good 95% of the original cast
from the original two movies doing cameos was a little off putting but not so
much so it takes me out of the story or the movie itself though it should be
mentioned that while yes they couldn’t get Harold Ramis physically because he
had died before production began they were able to create a bust of him
used in the beginning of this movie and as for Rick Moranis the reason he
wasn’t a part of the movie is a sad one. He lost his wife in 1991 to cancer and
after that he decided to park it and take care of his two children not long after she passed away. (Cut to
recreated clips from the movie as performed by Team TLOTA as James does a
voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): But again I digress, Bill Murray’s Cameo
is that of a sceptic who believes the Ghostbusters are bunk but Erin opens the
Trap holding the ghost (Show the ghost throwing him out the window and the
"Goofy" holler is heard as a thud follows after when the Waa-Waa Music from
“The Real Ghostbusters” play and they Shrug their shoulders before cutting to a
Ghost performed by Phelous in a black background and a red circle with a
Diagonal line through it slams on to Phelous’ Ghost Character as he says with a
sigh “James Faraci, The Last Of The
Americans will be right back after these messages” as “The Real Ghostbusters”
commercial sting plays in the background before cutting to a second of a black screen
before cutting to Phelous’ Ghost Character with a blowtorch looking to cut
through the circle with the diagonal line before he blows out the flame
chuckles and says “We now return to James Faraci The Last Of The Americans” as
“The Real Ghostbusters” commercial sting plays in the background before cutting
to recreated clips from the movie as performed by Team TLOTA as James does a
voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Well their recent activities have caught
the eyes and ears of the Mayor of the city played by Andy Garcia and his aide
played by Cecily Strong.
Mayor’s Aide (Played by Rebecca Yaun): On behalf of the
Mayor, we are so glad to have you four save us from an attack from a ghost that
could’ve cost the lives of thousands if not millions of our registered voters.
The Mayor (Played by Paulo Fonseca): However, in the press,
I must denounce you as renegades to protect our tourist trade and capability to
film TV Series and Movies here.
Erin, Abby, Holtzmann & Patty (In Unison): ARE YOU
KIDDING US?!
The Mayor (Played by Paulo Fonseca): And you must be in
constant contact with our federal contacts with Homeland Security so you can do
what you must in private to save us and in public you must be further crucified
for the greater good. (Cut to a clip of Hot Fuzz in which the secret society
say in unison “The Greater Good” before cutting to James physically)
TLOTA: Really?! Okay One last comparison between the classic
and this new movie and it focuses on the character of the Mayor in both of
these movies and how the one in the classic is better! (Cut to stills of the
Mayor from the classic Ghostbusters Movie and the new Ghostbusters movie as
James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Here’s where I give the Original the
credit where credit is due. The Mayor was reasonable and could see that his city
was in danger and was willing to work with the Ghostbusters to protect the people who voted him in. But in the new
movie, he’s an ass and I have no remorse in calling an ass, an ass! Why? Because
he’s putting the people who voted for him in danger he’s supposed to protect us but he doesn't want to because he wants to keep
the finances for his city up and running! WHAT A GIGANTIC MORONIC ASS! (Cut to
recreated clips from the movie as performed by Team TLOTA as James does a
voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): But eventually Erin discovers that all
the appearances from the ghosts connect through Ley Lines at the Mercado Hotel
where guess who works there! (Show Rowan as he giggles insanely and mumbles
about breaking the barriers and Cuckoo birds cuckoo continually.)
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): Freeze!
Holtzmann (Played by Traci Hines): Move and I’ll blow you
sky high!
Patty (Played by Renee Miller): We’re gonna take you in ya
crazy honkey bastard!
Rowan North (Played by John Santos): There’s no way you can
stop me from becoming The Lord Of The Dead and killing all the living!
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): You need to meet
better people and I happen to know three other guys like you they’ve got
nothing to live for except complaining you can learn how to handle the world
better.
Rowan North (Played by John Santos): Yeah, I don’t think so!
(The Four react Rowan jumps back out of frame as he electrocutes himself and
screams and speaks in tongues until he shouts “Adieb! Adieb! Adieb! THAT’S ALL
FOLKS!” and an explosion turns him into extra crispy critter and the four smell
him.)
Patty (Played by Renee Miller): Whoo that boy reeked of
crazy, loneliness, despair and sad!
Abby Yates (Played by Olivia Horvath): And apparently bad
soup! (The electronic device powers up)
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): HO BOY! We don’t shut
that off we’re looking at Old Testament Wrath Of God Level “WE’RE SCREWED!” I
mean Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!
Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes! The dead rising from the
grave! Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria! (The
Machine powers down) How the…?
Holtzmann (Played by Traci Hines): Yeah The more they
overthink the size of the explosion, the easier it is to stop the bomb. By the way,
looky what I found! (Holtzmann finds a copy of Erin & Abby’s Book and Erin
grabs it)
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): YOINK!
TLOTA (Voiceover): As the four are carted away the Mayor’s
Aide congratulates them out of earshot of the press and AGAIN continues to
follow the Mayor’s request to make them out to be worse than Terrorists!
The Mayor’s Aide (Played by Rebecca Yaun): And as these
vigilantes tried to stop the poor lonely sad man from frying himself he
realized who they were and ultimately took his own life. We will make an
example of them. (Turns to them as she signals deadpan “Great Job, now officers
get them out of here!” and two Homeland Security agents played by Phelous and
Eric Kurtzke drag the four away) They will be charged and hung up by their
knockoff Jimmy Choos!
TLOTA (Voiceover): But as Erin looks over the Book from
Rowan’s place she discovers that killing himself was part of his plan to become
Lord of The Dead and as it is with all villains TAKE OVER THE WORLD! (Cut to
clip of Carlos Mencia as Punji going “Oh, Of Course” before cutting back
recreated clips of the movie as James continues his voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Realizing that they’re still 428 flavors
of screwed over. Erin tries to get the mayor to come to grips with reality but
he would rather be an ass than reasonable because let’s face it the Mayor would
rather keep money flowing in than DOING YOUR JOB WHICH IS TO SERVE
AND PROTECT THE PEOPLE OF YOUR CITY AS MAYOR! (Erin grabs the Table as two guards played by James Faraci and
Phelous grab Erin as they try to escort her out.)
Erin Gilbert (Crying played by Eliza Dushku): YOU DON’T GET
IT! WE’RE ALL SCREWED! IT’S A BUG HUNT MAN! GAME OVER MAN! GAME OVER! YOU’RE
WORSE THAN THE MAYOR FROM “JAWS” YOU’RE AN ASS!
The Mayor (Played by Paulo Fonseca): Never compare me to the
Mayor from “Jaws”! NEVER COMPARE ME TO THE MAYOR FROM “JAWS”! (The Mayor
chuckles) It is okay my people, the city is safe, it has never been safer!
TLOTA (Voiceover): Back at the headquarters, the spirit of
Rowan possesses Abby and makes her try to destroy the equipment and nearly kill
Holtzmann. So what does Patty do? Pimp smack the hell out of Abby to get the
Ghost out! That works!
Patty (Played by Renee Miller): GET! (Patty forehand smacks
Abby) OUT! (Patty backhand smacks Abby) OF! (Patty forehand smacks Abby) MY! (Patty
backhand smacks Abby) FRIEND! (Patty forehand smacks Abby) YOU! (Patty backhand
smacks Abby) HONKY! (Patty forehand smacks Abby) SACK! (Patty backhand smacks
Abby) OF! (Patty forehand smacks Abby) PROTO! (Patty backhand smacks Abby) PLASM!
(The spirit leaves as Patty continues to smack Abby around before Abby shouts
“ENOUGH!”) Oh, I’m sorry baby!
Kevin (Audio only played by Nick Yaun): Hey Guys, What’s
this weird cloud thing!
Abby, Holtzmann & Patty (In Unison): Uh-Oh! (The three
watch as Kevin is possessed by the Spirit of Rowan)
Kevin (Dressed as Thor and Now possessed by the Spirit of
Rowan vocally performed by Phelous but physically played by Nick Yaun.): NOW TO
FINISH MY MASTER PLAN! (Cackles evilly)
TLOTA (Voiceover): With Rowan now possessing Kevin he
finishes his device and opens a breach between the realm of the dead and the
realm of the living! Homeland Security tries to intervene but wind up stuck in
an End Credit Dance Sequence! Meanwhile The Ghostbusters decide it’s time to
take the fight to the Ghosts and equip themselves with more than just their
Proton Packs! They’ve got Proton weapons that blast, shred and make the ghosts
go BOOM!
Erin Gilbert (firing her Proton Rifle Played by Eliza Dushku):
DON’T RUN! DON’T RUN! COME HERE I JUST WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!
Patty (Singing played by Renee Miller): MOW ‘EM DOWN! SHRED
‘EM UP! MOW ‘EM DOWN! SHRED ‘EM UP! MOW ‘EM DOWN! SHRED ‘EM UP! GHOSTHIDE! MOW
‘EM DOWN! SHRED ‘EM UP! MOW ‘EM DOWN! SHRED ‘EM UP! MOW ‘EM DOWN! SHRED ‘EM UP!
SHRED ‘EM UP! GHOSTHI-I-I-I-I-I-IDE!
Holtzmann (Played by Traci Hines): You know my favorite
Kevin James movie is? HERE COMES THE BOOM!
Abby Yates (Played by Olivia Horvath): What’s wrong? Oh
Yeah! YOUR ASS IS SOUP!
TLOTA (Voiceover): Eventually they reach the Epicenter of the disturbance where
Rowan discards Kevin and chooses his final form!
Rowan (vocally played by Phelous): What too cartoonish?
Rowan (Sounding more demonic with every next word coming out
of his mouth played by Phelous): Very well then, LET’S…. GET…. REAL! (The Ghost
becomes more dimensional, fifty trillion feet taller and physically played
Phelous! As the music from The Real Ghostbusters when the team is in the face
of Danger and the final chance to get the win in the episode “Knock Knock”)
TLOTA (Voiceover): And to add to the totally screwed Slimer
took Ecto One for a Joyride. The only solution? Direct Slimer to drive Ecto One
into the epicenter of the portal hit the Nuclear device on the top of Ecto One in
hopes to turn the portal that’s causing the Ghosts to come to our world into a
gigantic vacuum by reversing polarity of the neutron flow and bring them all
back and take Rowan with them! Fortunately, it worked until Rowan tries to hold
onto two skyscrapers and the team aim their Proton packs onto Rowan's Personal pack
Abby Yates (Played by Olivia Horvath): We meant to aim
there, right?
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): Uh yeah, let’s go
with that!
TLOTA (Voiceover): But Rowan isn’t going back alone as he
grabs Abby and Erin goes rushing in to save her! (Erin blasts Rowan into the
depths of the Ghostly realm and she grabs Abby)
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): Got ya! We’ve got
only one chance! FULL DISPERSION MODE! WIDE ANGLE! EVERYTHING WE’VE GOT IT
MIGHT JUST PUSH US BACK! GO! GO! GO! (The two fire their Proton Packs
accelerating them out of the Portal!)
TLOTA (Voiceover): And thus Rowan is defeated and our heroes
are still meant to be looked up as evil as a Republican in the Press by the
Mayor. The Mayor’s aide tells the team the Mayor will fund their research and
set them up with better headquarters and the Movie ends with The Big Apple
sending love to the Ladies who saved their city!
Erin Gilbert (Played by Eliza Dushku): You know something,
this maybe the start of something amazing. (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: So that was “Ghostbusters: Answer The Call” and I
thought this was Great! (Cut to clips recreated by Team TLOTA mixed with stills
from the actual movie as well as clips from the 1984 classic as James does a
voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): While nothing will EVER take away my love
of the original two movies and the Animated series this movie does what few
reboots do. It honors the past while does its own thing. The Story while
borrowing beats and elements from the original is well told, the characters are
enjoyable including Erin & Holtzmann, the effects range from average to
amazing and I was honestly surprised to see how great everything was in this
movie. If you want to see it, go for the gusto and see it in 3D in the theaters
or if you want to wait until it’s available in the home market get on Blu-Ray/DVD/Digital
Download it’s worth the time and money! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: Now if you’ll excuse me….
Eric Kurtzke (Audio only): James…. (Cut to everyone else at
the door)
Paulo Fonseca: We’ve been holding this person off long
enough. Are you done with your review? (Cut to James.)
TLOTA: Yeah, Bring ‘em on. (Cut to the main lobby as a
Lindsay Nagel type exec played by Olivia Horvath is looking around as James
comes face to face with her.)
TLOTA: Can I help you?
L.N. Exec: Uh yes, I work for a focus group “O DASH S” and
we’d like to help you move to the next level and what I’m seeing is Rounded
Glasses.
TLOTA: Rounded Glasses?
L.N. Exec: Yes, those glasses look sharp and could scare
someone!
TLOTA: They’re a curved rectangular shape!
L.N. Exec: But you’d look so much better in Rounded Glasses
and do we need all the females to be so fierce. I prefer docile and feminine females
to be around who… (The L.N. Exec from “O DASH S” continues to just make the
same notes that Q5 did that ruined “The Real Ghostbusters” when James notices
the header on the note of that being Q5. James tosses the note when a hand from
Phelous comes up and stops him.)
Phelous: Hold it James, I’ve got this is one!
L.N. Exec (Audio only): And can we focus the series more on
the green ghost instead of a movie review! (A gun shot is heard and a yelp in
pain is heard before screams and gun shots are heard and Team TLOTA react as the bouncing Slimer music from "The Real Ghostbusters" is heard in the foreground)
Phelous (Audio only): DON’T RUN! DON’T RUN! COME HERE I JUST
WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND! AND THAT ONE IS FOR MAKING DAVE COULIER PETER VENKMAN!
NOW CLEAN UP YOUR BLOOD AS YOU DIE! (James sighs as James whips out his cell
phone)
TLOTA: Well, looks like I know who I have to call.
John Santos: The Ghostbusters?
TLOTA: Well them and my attorney see if I can get Phelous
off on a mental defense. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That’s
My Opinion! Hello Eric Adler… (James walks away as the music from the ending of
an Episode of “The Real Ghostbusters” plays in the background and everyone else
just stand there looking at one another.)
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