Top 10 Episodes of THE ORVILLE So Far

(Scene begins in the depths of space as we see The Orville flying in the depths of space. We soon find Lt. Cmdr. John LaMarr, Lt. Cmdr. Bortus, Isaac, Lt. Cmdr. Talla Keyali, Cmdr. Grayson & Capt. Ed Mercer as they discover a bunch of devices, one being a Sonic Screwdriver and ORAC inside a room for scientific research)

ISAAC:
According to scientists, these artifacts were found in what was once known as Sullivan County, New York. During the twentieth century, specifically a heyday in The 1920s until the 1960s, it was part of what was known as "The Borscht Belt." It was when residents known as Hotels were used to finding talent for television, movies, and theater, both local and national. And Borscht is a soup made from beetroot and topped with Sour Cream. It is also served cold.

Lt. Cmdr. John LaMarr:
According to what I've read in the research, this is a Screwdriver. Though I thought it was for personal stimulation because of the sonic frequencies. 

Lt. Cmdr. Talla Keyali:
And according to what I've read, This is a supercomputer. It has an activation key that runs on a rechargeable battery. A few ounces of self-sustaining energy from the Quantum Core will suffice in reactivating it. With your permission, Captain.

Captain Ed Mercer:
Let's see if it can work. (Talla puts the activation key in, and the ship shuts down)

Cmdr. Kelly Grayson (Audio only):
John, find the backup generators and get them going! (The ship restarts, and ORAC activates)

ORAC:
All systems and functions are at one hundred percent. (Everyone except Isaac jumps back in surprise.)

ISAAC:
I am Isaac. You are... (Cut to ORAC)

ORAC:
ORAC! A supercomputer created for the British Broadcasting Corporation's Science Fiction series known as "Blake's 7," I was revived by one James Faraci to assist him in his reviews as his Internet Reviewing persona known as "The Last Of The Americans," and if I am given access to an area where I can create a holographic connection to him and his time. I shall show you what he was like. I am also aware of all the people on board the Planetary Union Starship USS ORVILLE Service number ECV-197. Status: Active in service as a Mid-level exploratory ship however, from interspace chatter, it is becoming a flagship for the Planetary Union. (Cut to Captain Ed Mercer

Captain Ed Mercer:
Impressive. John take... (Cut to ORAC)

ORAC:
ORAC!  (Cut to Captain Ed Mercer)

Captain Ed Mercer:
Right! ORAC to an environmental simulator. Bortus, Talla, run a security sweep to make sure ORAC won't take us into the heart of a sun. (Cut to ORAC)

ORAC:
I observe Asimov's rules of robotics. One) I may not injure or harm a human being through any action or inaction or allow a human to be harmed. Two) I will obey any order unless it comes into conflict with the first rule. Finally, I must protect myself as long as it does not conflict with the first and second laws. Besides, It would be a waste of time and energy best used as assistance in any way, shape, or form for your Planetary Union for any passing idea of intergalactic conquest. Think of all the religious and sociological differences that would cause me to suffer a catastrophic malfunction that would reduce the galaxies to dust. But to alleviate your discomfort, I have run the security checks myself. No foreign virus or program has infected either myself or your ship.

Captain Ed Mercer:
I appreciate it. Place ORAC in an environmental simulator; we'll run this by the Admiralty. (Cut to an exterior shot of the Orville as it flies in the depths of space as Admiral Halsey appears on board the ship with the others in the environmental simulator with ORAC.)

Admiral Halsey:
Fascinating. So ORAC's priority is to act as an assistant for information or as a one-device assistant when a complete crew is incapacitated.

ORAC (Audio only):
Indeed, Admiral Halsey, And I am preparing the necessary connections to show you my former owner, James Faraci The Last Of The Americans, at his office. (Cut to Captain Ed Mercer)

Captain Ed Mercer:
When will it be... (The environmental simulator changes to James Faraci The Last Of The Americans' Lobby) ready?

ORAC (Audio only):
Currently, you are still in your environmental simulator. The temporal connection point I made with the studio would be synchronized with James at the current point of the year 2022.

Lt. Gordon Malloy:
Wow, so this was what it was like in 2022. Reminds me of that one simulation. (The sound of walking is heard as James walks in, sees the crew of The Orville, smiles, and looks over his workload for the next few months.)

TLOTA:
Make yourself comfortable; I am just about to finish my August workload. Of course, it will be a little awkward because it's about you guys. (Cut to Lt. Cmdr. Bortus and Lt. Cmdr. John Lamarr.)

Lt. Cmdr. Bortus:
It can see us.  I thought it was a Hologram.

Lt. Cmdr. John Lamarr:
I did a scan; this is more than just a recorded hologram from the past. According to the results, ORAC has turned this environmental simulator into a holographic imaging chamber and connected itself to a version of itself from 2022. How that is possible?

TLOTA:
I will tell you during the intro. (The scene fades to black as it cuts to the depths of space as a sound-alike to both the theme song of The Orville and the 1994 American Gladiators theme as we see the depths of space before cutting to James' Space-Time Device as it zooms through the sky as the title of "The Last Of The Americans" in the same font of The Orville's title card. James and his team are credited, and the guest stars are credited as the cast of "The Orville." Cut to the Space-Time Device as it flies through the depths of space with grace as it credits James as the writer and director of the episode. Cut to the crew of The Orville.)

Captain Ed Mercer:
Incredible, even though in our time we're real, in your time we're a tv series, and everything that is happening to you now, we're viewing you in the present time of your time.  While not affecting anything here, you are a hologram to us, and we are holograms to you. (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Exactly and I am about to talk about your adventures while you learn how your adventures are being thought of in my time. You check out the monitor; I will check out the camera above it so I can talk to the audience. I'm James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans, and the views I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. If you love Sci-Fi at its best, then you HAVE to watch The Orville. (Cut to the Title card of The Orville, then clips of the series as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Created by Seth MacFarland, the same one who created Family Guy, Ted, A Million Ways To Die In The West, and helped create American Dad. The Orville started as an idea by MacFarland's attempt to bring Star Trek back to the small screen. When Paramount told Seth to hit the bricks, he took his idea, refined it, and has since turned what could've been a bad parody attempt at Star Trek and turned it into the purest Sci-Fi series I have ever seen. The series stars MacFarland as Captain Ed Mercer as he travels into the depths of space on board the mid-level exploratory ship known as The Orville in the Planetary Union set in the 2420s. His crew consists of Lt. Gordon Malloy, played by Scott Grimes, The captain's best friend, and is possibly the best pilot in the Union.

Lt. Gordon Malloy (Audio only):
Thanks for the compliment

TLOTA (V.O.):
Next up is Isaac, played by Mark Jackson; Isaac is a Kaylon whose mission is to understand human behavior; throughout the first one and a half seasons, Isaac was a diplomat for his people. Of course, his people are robots, and comparisons were made to the character of Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation. While yes, on the surface, he could be considered a clone or a cheap knock-off of Data. His development led to love and being more than what his people were which according to Captain Ed Mercer, they're a bunch of racist robots. His development ties in with Dr. Claire Finn, played by the ever lovely and distinguished Penny Johnson Jerald, who you may also remember from shows like 24 and, of course, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine as Kasady Yates, Benjamin Sisko's love interest and eventual wife towards the end of the series run. Dr. Finn is a single mom of two boys, Ty & Marcus, she is the ship's doctor and often the counselor for everyone on board. Her development is intertwined with Isaac's because both Isaac and Claire start to develop a romantic relationship, and the culmination of said development is on this list.

Isaac (Audio only):
A fascinating description of the relationship you have between Claire and myself.

Dr. Claire Finn (Audio only):
A little brief, but something tells me you know what you are doing.

TLOTA (V.O.):
Next up is Lt. Cmdr. Talla Keyali, played by Jessica Szohr. She's the chief security officer and a Xelayan. A Xeleyan is lighter and stronger than a normal human under the differences of gravitational levels between earth and that of the Xelayan home world. Initially considered by fans as a knockoff of the previous chief security officer Lt. Alara Kitan, played by Halston Sage, we see that Talla is as good as her predecessor and quickly won the fans over by bringing her own shoes to the role of the chief security officer and won me over by showing empathy and true strength by using her head and her heart more than her fists.

Lt. Cmdr. Talla Keyali (Audio only):
Uh... Thank you?

TLOTA (V.O.):
You're most welcome. Up next is Lt. Cmdr. Bortus, played by Peter Macon. He's the second officer and is a Moclan. The Moclans were the primary weapons manufacturers for the Union until an incident involving Bortus' offspring Topa convinced the Union to tell the Moclans to get the hell out. More details about it later: they pee only once a year in a celebration called Ja'Loja and are supposed to be one gender only. We'll talk more about it as the countdown goes on. But he winds up with quite a bit of development, and I will talk about what happens to him when I talk about the episodes about him on the list. 

Lt. Cmdr. Bortus (Audio Only):
Interesting you know all about me.

TLOTA (V.O.):
 Finally, we have Commander Kelly Grayson, played by Adrienne Palicki, Her infidelities led Ed to suffer a year-long slump in his career, and she has since been seeking atonement for her actions. One of the actions of atonement was helping Ed get the Captain's chair of The Orville. The show started off in a rough patch but quickly found itself in the highest echelons of sci-fi and became a hit series. However, after two solid seasons, Fox promised the third season, but soon due to the usual chicanery that goes on with a series that everyone likes EXCEPT the network. Fox dropped the series. However, HULU granted the series a stay of execution and picked the series up for the third season. And after watching that season, it's clear that there's more greatness in the future, and at the time of this post, it is also now on Disney+.  While I will discuss my thoughts on the series at the end of the top ten list. I will say, YOU HAVE TO WATCH IT! But for now, to celebrate its success, so far, I am going to count down ten of the best episodes from one of the best Sci-Fi Series ever made. And so everyone knows, there will be spoilers. However, I will do my best to keep it to a minimum. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
So let us praise Avis and engage The Quantum Drive. This is the top ten best episodes of The Orville So Far! (Cut to different lines containing clips from the series proper as the main title of the series plays in the foreground, and the lines come together to create the Planetary Union's Logo and the words in the same text as the series opening credits "The Top Ten Best Episodes Of The Orville, So Far." The words fade as the number pops up over the Planetary Union's Logo, and James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number ten

10) Lasting Impressions and Twice In A Lifetime
(Cut to clips of the episodes as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
On an archaeological discovery in Saratoga Springs, NY. The archaeological team discovers a phone which features a girl named Laura, played by Leighton Meester; Gordon finds Laura so interesting that he decides to make up a simulation that features Laura in her life as Gordon tries to interact with her as much as he can. But when something he doesn't want with Laura happens, Gordon learns that he can't change the past without ruining something good for someone else. And as for the follow-up episode, "Twice in a Lifetime" shows Gordon doing exactly what he would have done. A bit of backstory, a device called the Aronov Temporal device was introduced in the pilot; the device was known to age things forwards or backward in a life span.  However, Lamarr is capable of turning the device into a time transfer device. And when The Kaylon hears about it, Gordon goes down to destroy it, which sends multiple versions of him throughout the Space-Time Continuum, which would explain certain people in other shows that look like Gordon Malloy.  But I digress; when the crew finds him, they arrive ten years too late. Gordon has married Laura, has a son, is expecting another kid, and has a job in aviation.  This puts everyone in conflict on what to do. Gordon says he has a good life and doesn't want to go back. However, the solution is even more heartbreaking than losing Gordon. Of course, any other solution is automatically thrown out of the airlock. But the ending stays with you as one of the most heartbreaking of the series. All things considered a strong entry point in this list.

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number nine

9) Pria
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
This episode is on the list because of how it balances out its A & B plots. The B plot is Gordon trying to teach Isaac about humor by doing practical jokes to one another. Gordon places Mr. Potato head pieces on Isaac, and Isaac takes it too far too quickly! (Show clip of Gordon having woken up with one leg and confronting him, calling Isaac Sick and saying that there is something wrong with Isaac. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
I've heard of jokes where someone said, "You're Pulling My Leg." but this was ridiculous. (Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Then, of course, there is the A plot which involves Pria Levesque played by...by...by...by...(Slowed down audio of the word "by" is heard as the saxophone pieces from "Careless Whisper" is heard we soon cut to the single members of Team TLOTA as they look in love with Charlize Theron. Cut to further clips of Charlize Theron as it cuts to the married couples of Team TLOTA as they look in love with Charlize Theron. Cut to more clips of Charlize Theron. Cut to James as he looks in love with Charlize Theron just as Julia Alexa Miller comes in with a bucket of ice water, and James gets hit with it and screams to high heavens as it cuts to a mountain with snow on it and James scream causes an avalanche! Cut to James physically as Captain Ed Mercer and Dr. Claire Finn come over to see what happened.)

Captain Ed Mercer:
What happened?

Dr. Claire Finn:
Judging by the scream...

TLOTA:
Can I tell you both something? I and that woman you saw, her name is Julia Alexa Miller AKA Alex Liquidverve Miller on Instagram. We have minor arguments, which lead to her winning by having my privates waxed! (Captain Ed Mercer slowly backs away) The fact I saw Charlize Theron and had that look of falling in love was wrong of me. So as a reminder, even though the hairs grow back, she occasionally reminds me of where I stand with her now. And ice cold water on freshly waxed privates hurt like nobody's business! 

Dr. Claire Finn:
I know that sensation. Might I suggest...

TLOTA:
We have an on-site therapist, Dr. Denny. He's good, a little obsessed with the 2003 movie "The Room," but he's competent, and I want to get back to work right now. (Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Yeah, this is Pria Levesque, played by Charlize Theron. Probably doing the episode as a favor to Seth MacFarland, but nevertheless, She is amazing as Pria. Pria's mysterious actions and dialogue throughout the episode keep Kelly guessing until it's too late as Pria takes the ship into the further future. A catfight between Kelly and Pria and Isaac's consciousness in the ship causes Ed to regain the ship and destroy the black hole everyone went through, eliminating Pria from everything. What also puts this episode on the list is that everything started to gain more traction by this point. The Critics were slowly coming around to the series, the fan base was growing rapidly, and the ratings were starting to climb for the series. So this episode was pivotal to helping the series become bigger and better as the season went on. So this episode was worth putting on the list. 

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number Eight

8) Future Unknown
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
A lot of people called this episode unnecessary. But after a season of so much heavy-duty intense Sci-Fi action, adventure, and drama, a comedic respite was LONG overdue! And this was the perfect comedic respite. After a disturbing ceremony in which Bortus and Klyden renew their vows. Isaac decided that the time was right to take the next step in his relationship with Dr. Claire Finn. Isaac proposed marriage to Dr. Claire Finn after leading the audience most of the second season, and this season, unsure of their relationship, decided that they'd like it and they were gonna put rings on it. I know Futurama would look down on the relationship, but according to Isaac, he would be there for Claire and her boys and any further descendants. And anyone who is able to do that is someone you don't let go of. And in typical comedic wackiness, Isaac invites everyone on his home planet to the event! (Cut to Isaac as he tells Captain Mercer why they're there. Cut to a still of Isaac as Waa-Waa music plays, Cut to James physically as he comedically shrugs his shoulders. Cut back to the episode as James does a voiceover.) We also get a return of Lysella, played by Giorgia Whigham, seeking asylum from her planet. She is tired of the usual rigamarole on her planet, which I will discuss later on this list. Alara Kitan, played by Halston Sage, also came in as a cameo to see how everyone was, wish the best to both Claire and Isaac, and fully pass the torch to Talla. But suffice to say, this comedic breather was awesome! And for those who have problems with the comedic tone, I say this, even shows like Star Trek in every series and the occasional movie had their comedic relief moments/episodes. So take it easy and enjoy the laugh and the love between Isaac and Claire. (Cut to James, Dr. Claire Finn, and Isaac physically)

TLOTA:
And before I forget, even though the episode aired and I watched it. I wish I could've been there to say L'Chaim and Mazel Tov. That was Hebrew wishing you the best of health and congratulations.

Dr. Claire Finn & Isaac (In Unison):
Thank you

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number seven

7) About A Girl, Sanctuary, A Tale Of Two Topas, and Midnight Blue
(Cut to clips of the episodes as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Talk about a storyline that was well timed throughout the series so far. Topa was hatched at the end of the second episode, and according to Moclan society, if a baby is born a girl, she has to have surgery that changes them into a male. While Bortus and his mate Klyden played by Chad L. Coleman, are initially on board to continue the tradition. Many on board were horrified by this callous attitude towards Topa's existence. When of all things, John Lamarr and Gordon Malloy decide to bring a six-pack, and the Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer tv special Bortus gains clarity about Topa being different. Things are different because we discover Klyden bought the lie as it was discovering that Klyden was born female, went through the surgery, and thought he would have a better life. We also discover that Moclus is a weapon-manufacturing planet, saying, "We're in this union; you need our weapons." We also discover that their most well-known philosopher and author is female. However, whatever happened failed to keep Topa from fate. We soon find the philosopher Heveena, played by Rena Owen, disillusioned to the point where she leaves Moclus to set up a colony planet that has its own underground railroad for the females that would be free for them. And we soon discover that Heveena, on a reason to keep the planet safe listened to Dolly Parton and inspired her with the strength and courage to fight for their colony. In the most recent season, Topa discovers the truth and decides that for Topa to be free, he becomes the girl she was meant to be. With that, we move on to Midnight Blue. Dolly Parton guest stars! That is the biggest reason for this episode to be on the list. But this episode is crucial as Topa decides to help the colony planet. She's then captured and tortured by Moclans as a traitor on Moclus, helping the colony planet. Bortus and Kelly Grayson rescue Topa. However, after seeing Topa looking like crap, Bortus decides to beat the fothermucker who hurt Topa within an inch of his life. Showing what has happened to the Union. Moclus is forced out of the union. And after a long time away, Klyden finally accepts Topa as his daughter. With the three eventually renouncing their citizenship to their home planet.  These episodes were so great, and the storyline had been well-timed throughout the series run that if this is how the storyline ends for Topa, I was well entertained, and the episodes have done a great job in storytelling as great as a soap opera. And of course, DOLLY PARTON! If you can get Dolly Parton and have her inspire the galaxy, then it deserves to be on this list.

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number six

6) Old Wounds
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
It kind of stinks that I put the pilot in the number six slot as it does set the series and our characters up. But in terms of series pilots, it's one of the best I've seen. After his wife cheats on him with a blue alien, Ed Mercer's career hits the skids. it's up to Admiral Halsey, played by Victor Garber, to help him out of his year-long funk by giving Ed one last chance to get back on track by giving him The Orville. Discovering that his ex-wife is now his XO, he tries to be professional even if their first conversation as Captain and XO becomes so loud that I think everyone on earth in my time heard them! But after an encounter between them and the Krill, they discover they work better as a Captain and XO better than husband and wife. Even though, at the end of the episode, we discover that Kelly got Ed the Captain's chair as an act of atonement for what she did. It was possibly some of the best sci-fi I had seen since the Star Trek series and movies of the 1990s. Granted, it had its few stumbles; if you have seen it, it is nice to see what can start so small and become something bigger.

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number five

5) Gently Falling Rain
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
On the eve of peace between The Krill and The Planetary Union, Teleya, played by Michaela McManus, takes the chancellor's throne, effectively ending all hope for peace. The delegates from the Planetary Union are now being prepared for execution, one of them being the Planetary Union's president, played by Babylon 5's Bruce Boxleitner. Even more shocking is the fact that Ed has a daughter, Anaya, and Teleya is her mom. Though she denies it to the populace for fear of losing her power. And just for the record, Teleya is doing this because Ed hurt her by saving her and innocent children on a reconnaissance mission he had in season one. Talk about gratitude. While Ed is hopeful to see his daughter again and regain some sort of peace between the Krill and The Union. By the end of the episode, you can tell Teleya was going to use her daughter as a political tool, and all hopes for peace have been destroyed for now. As for what the future holds? Maybe, one day, both sides will regain the peace they lost, and Ed can hopefully make up for the lost time when Anaya's mom decided that power meant more than peace because her pride was hurt. 

(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And for those who use your children for devious reasons, I say SHAME ON YOU! SHAME ON ALL OF YOU FOR YOUR CALLOUS AND CAVALIER ATTITUDES TOWARDS CHILDREN! YOU DON'T DESERVE THE RIGHT TO BE PARENTS! GO TO HELL! ALL OF YOU! YOU'RE SCUM! And to Teleya, if you are seeing this in your cell, let me say the following, You're a scaly bitch! If not for the fact you have limbs and an acute aversion to sunlight, you'd be no different from a SNAKE! Cold-blooded, vicious, and without conscience! And I hope AVIS condemns you to the Krill equivalent of hell! (Sighs, then regains his calm) Before I get to number four, there is something I need to talk about, the content of the episode. It talks about social media. I should say the following about Social Media. I use Social Media as a tool to promote my work and connect with my family and friends. Very rarely do I ever talk about, Politics or the society we live in and talk about it in any way on Social Media. Even rarer is when I use Social Media for fun! Social Media used properly is meant to connect us all together. With that said... (Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number four

4) Majority Rule
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The crew is on a mission on the planet Sargas 4 to find missing anthropologists. What they find is the planet's society being run by Social Media. Imagine if MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat, and every other form of Social Media became the governing body of an entire planet. And if you get a certain amount of downvotes, well, you wind up lobotomized, and your I.Q. is equal to spaghetti.

Isaac (Audio only):
There is a race known as The Spaghetti in the Union. Are you talking about them?

TLOTA (V.O.):
I'm talking about the dried pasta, Isaac. But I digress; Lamarr finds himself in a situation of his own mistakes as he winds up getting into trouble with the planet as he faces lobotomization for well his grinding. Alara Kitan nearly finds herself in Lamarr's predicament and avoids it barely, but the team sent to investigate is met with an ordinary member of Sargas 4's society who helps rescue Lamarr from winding up with Spaghetti for intelligence. Lysella, played by Giorgia Whigham, creates a promotional campaign to save Lamarr his fate. Lysella would return to The Orville in the latest episode, tired of being part of her planet's society. This episode highlights in its own way how blindly siding with what is popular on social media will turn your humanity off. Following those that Social Media says you should or must because they're the popular thing right now or having Social Media tell you to shun or crucify someone because Social Media tells you to do it. Doing what social media tells you without your conscience telling you to do otherwise can eventually erode away your humanity. Blindly saying yes to this or no to that because everyone else is doing it. And lest we forget those who have been lobotomized! If they weren't found guilty, they would have been able to take Sargas 4 to the stars. But we'll never know because in a society that's been controlled by Social Media that said fricassee their brains because that's what we tell you to do is the answer for everything. And for those who got their minds reduced to (Making the Sargas 4 who got Lobotomized sound as they are): one plus one equals IPUTSTHESQUAREINTHEROUNDHOLE! (Talking normally): Their loved ones are now stuck caring for them forever. Sargas 4, you are so downvoted that I would gladly see EVERY SINGLE LAST PERSON THERE GET THEIR BRAINS REDUCED TO THE CONSISTENCY OF RICE PUDDING!!

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number three

3) Nothing On Earth Excepting Fishes
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
This one is a personal choice for me. For the first time in a long time since Ed and Kelly's divorce. Both are happy with new loved ones in their lives and their careers on the upswing.  Ed and Lt. Janel Tyler played by Michaela McManus, are a happy couple heading out on a vacation when the two are intercepted by a Krill fighter. Ed is doing everything it takes to survive when the truth about Janel Tyler's identity is exposed. Janel Tyler is, in fact, the Krill female Teleya he met on his reconnaissance mission to discover more about the Krill. She was sent in as a spy to learn more about The Planetary Union and get to Ed Mercer. She succeeded, and by the end of the episode, as Ed lets Teleya go, you can feel the pain Ed feels come through in the music from Billy Joel. The fact that this episode ended on such a somber note left me waxing introspective about my failures in the romance department. And if an episode can have me feeling that by the end, it is worthy of this list!

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Number two

2) Domino
(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Many people loved the new season, and this episode, The Penultimate episode of the season, sees the changing faces of the wars being raged. With Moclus now out of the Planetary Union, they turn to the Krill for an alliance. Meanwhile, Isaac has created a weapon using tech from another reformed Kaylon to create a device to wipe them all out. Helping Isaac out is Ensign Charley Burke, played by Anne Winters. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And from what I heard, the fandom didn't like her attitude towards Isaac, nor did they like Charley as a character. The fans considered her another Dawn Summers, Wesley Crusher, Adric from classic Doctor Who, Connor from Angel, or one of the many offenders of being the most annoying character in a series or franchise. But I liked her for what she was. She survived hell and is now on board with a creature representing all the evil she fought and killed those she loved. No wonder she was abrasive. And before anyone asks, she was a member of the LGBTQIA+ Community, and I am fine with that. (Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The weapon is, of course, successful, which leads to the type of discussions only heard about in recent years in the movies and series that talk about this in a frank and honest manner. To me, even though it was in defense of the Xelayan Homeworld. You can see on Seth MacFarlane's face that the results were devastating and disgusting!  Because this was something that Steve Rogers talked about in Captain America The Winter Soldier. Holding a weapon over your friends, enemies, and everyone else and calling it "Protection!" What The Union was doing wasn't protecting freedom. it was using fear; Terrorism at its most basic and beastly of concepts! Even worse, Admiral Perry, played by Ted Danson, betrays the Planetary Union by handing over the Kaylon Doomsday Device to the newly formed alliance. His reward? Being blasted into the depths of space and hell. A new alliance between the Kaylon and Union is forged to either recover or destroy the weapon. The battle is gloriously awesome to see. However, the final stand to either stop or destroy the device leads Charley to sacrifice herself to rescue everyone else. This act shows Kaylon Primary that not all biologicals are evil.  In the end, This leads to an alliance between The Kaylon and The Union, even opening the door for a possible membership for the Kaylon. And the most heart-wrenching moment came from Isaac, someone who Charley hated with a burning passion, who gave the most poignant and simple eulogy for her. This episode was the critical moment for cementing a new hope for everyone, a lingering threat for the Planetary Union, and so many more stories for seasons to come.

(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Now before I go to the number one spot, The episodes that are Honorable mentions are every other episode in the series that didn't make this list. They have their strong and weak points, and they were too good to be on this list. Now that I have said that, I give you all...

(Cut to the Planetary Union's Logo as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The number one BEST episode, So Far, Of The Orville...

1) Identity Parts 1 & 2

(Cut to clips of the episode as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
This episode raised the stakes for the series and set it up to be more than just a Sci-Fi Spoof of Star Trek. Isaac and Dr. Claire Finn have just gotten Ty & Marcus' approval for their relationship when mysteriously, Isaac collapses. What happened? Apparently, Isaac just shut down because according to the programming he had in him. He had enough information for The Kaylon to decide whether or not to join the union. However, Ty, the younger of the Finn Brothers, played by Kai Wener, discovers a dark secret that changes the game. The Kaylon murdered the organic life forms, which leads The Kaylon to take over The Orville and head for the earth to wipe every living thing out! And that was in part one! In Part two, Isaac makes a decision that shows where his true loyalty is, and it is not with his people, by saving Ty from extermination. Yaphit, played by the late Norm MacDonald, also steps up by getting into a Kaylon to shut it down; Kelly and Gordon take the chance to convince the Krill that the Kaylon are their enemies and they need to unite. After reclaiming the ship, Mercer contacts the Union and calling this battle The Orville's version of the Battle Of Wolf 359 is not entirely inaccurate, but if I were on YouTube and I could show the clips without copyright claims, I would play the battle with Sabotage by The Beastie Boys in it as well, it was that damned awesome! When The Krill come in to rescue them, it was the first time enemies could call themselves comrades in arms. And while yes, in the third season, Teleya screwed the pooch by becoming the Chancellor and saying there would be no way in hell between the warring races for peace. It looked like the seeds were sown for one brief, shining moment, hoping that a mutual enemy could make them see how much they were alike. As For Isaac, he was alone, now having to rebuild his reputation and rebuilding bonds that were broken when his people came to wipe us out. To say that this two-part episode was so imperative to the series' future is putting it mildly. It raised the stakes for the series. The development that came from this two-parter helped shape the next season, and if everyone is right, we're going to get more great battles and more great seasons to come, all because of enemies coming together to stop a common threat and hopes for peace were possible. 

(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And even though I put every other episode from the series in the Honorable mentions portion, if you want to tell me which of those episodes are your favorites. Let me know why in the comments section. Now, if I haven't made it clear enough, I LOVE THIS SERIES, AND IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT, WHAT IN THE NAME OF SAMUEL LANGFORD HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! (Cut to clips of The Orville as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
You are straight up missing out on one of the best Sci-Fi series, not just in this century but since the advent of Sci-Fi! The writing is amazing! The acting is superb! The Production Value is used perfunctorily; everything about this series is PERFECT! Check it out on either Hulu or Disney+ and see Star Trek perfected in a way that Gene Roddenberry, at his most sensible, would be proud to call The Orville its spiritual successor! (Cut to James and everyone from The Orville)

Captain Ed Mercer:
As glad as I am to see you have enjoyed our adventures, You sounded very irritated about how certain episodes wound up. I mean, if you were trying to vent about the negatives in order to enjoy the positives, then I understand, and just so you're aware, we did our research while you were doing your thing. Things do get better for you. And for the record...

TLOTA:
You can't tell me! I understand! ORAC! Take care of them.

ORAC (Audio only):
I will do my best to assist the Planetary Union from where I am now. But you, your team, and I still have a long way to go. 

Lt. Cmdr. Bortus:
I must ask Why the events involving Topa and my family were at the Number 7 spot.

TLOTA:
In my culture, the number 7 is a good and lucky number.

Lt. Cmdr. Bortus:
In the Moclan culture, the number 7 is something you may not be aware of. 

TLOTA:
Guess So. I guess this is it. It has been a pleasure meeting all of you. (The environmental simulator doors open.) Guess this is goodbye. (Everyone says their goodbyes, and everyone walks away) Before you go, remember this, I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and that's my opinion! (James presses a button that shuts off the holographic connection in the Environmental Simulator. Cut to The Orville as it continues to fly through the stars. Fade To Black)

"The Punisher" and The Punishment of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans

(Scene begins with a laser beam in the sky as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as four shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Kent Lilly and Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame, moving towards the camera, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear, and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left, and John and Mike Santos, and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward moving toward the camera, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left, and Olivia Horvath appears in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written by James Faraci with assistance from Steve Kidd, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions, Directed by James Faraci” as it ends, the Laser beam disappears, and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the laser beam cut out the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appear. At the 0:32-0:36 mark, the term “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down, and James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into the frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans, and half of team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans.” Cut to James placing three Blu-Ray cases on an indoor shooting range as James pulls out the double-barreled handgun and loads the gun. James then proceeds to shoot two of the cases. Cut to James)

TLOTA
Very well then, let’s do it! (A voice says, “Do what?” off-screen as James turns and screams, and then Julia Alexa Miller has a sonic scream which shatters James’ eardrums and glasses. James then proceeds to fix his hearing and replace his glasses, then sighs.) Alex, you need to be careful; I was setting up which PUNISHER movie I want to review. (Cut to Julia Alexa Miller as she walks to James)

Julia Alexa Miller:
I’m sorry, but Chad called me to talk to you about directing that game show idea… (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Which he didn’t come up with; he purchased the rights from those guys so he can rework it to his advantage. I mean, that game show was good and funny, but I think he’s out to drive me out of what’s left of my marbles. I am trying to get my projects going, and he’s trying to get me into his stuff which slows my projects down to a grinding halt. Then I am…

 (Cut to James in his office having to write how to reinvent that game show to be more of his concept without changing too much of the structure.)

TLOTA:
How did this happen? No, seriously, I was talking to Alex, and the next thing I know, I am dealing with fixing Chad Narducci’s mess! This is insanity! It’s…it’s… It’s just frigging Punishment! (Cut to the title screen of the Thomas Jane PUNISHER movie, then to clips of the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Made around the same time as movies like DAREDEVIL and the 20th Century Fox-based Fantastic Four movies with Jessica Alba, Chris Evans, and Michael Chiklis. THE PUNISHER tells the take of former Government agent Frank Castle as he goes on a one-man crusade to take “Punishment” on those who slaughtered his family like cattle! But how far can this movie go, and where does it go from Uber-Violent to Uber-Ridiculous? (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Let’s see what we’ve gotten ourselves into this is… The Punisher! (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
One thing I want to give praise to right off the bat is the score as done by Carlo Siliotto. It is so amazing that if it weren’t in this movie, it would be in one of Sergio Leone’s Spaghetti Westerns. But I digress; the movie opens in Tampa, Florida, as we see an illegal arms deal goes down the drain, with one of the dealers being an undercover FBI agent named Frank Castle, played by Thomas Jane. Which happens to be his retirement sting. One of those killed in the crossfire is named Bobby Saint. This happens to get the attention of Bobby’s daddy Howard Saint played by John Travolta. We cut to Frank and his family in Puerto Rico for a family reunion. His father, played by Roy Scheider, is happy to see everyone there. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And seeing as how this is The Punisher, Frank’s family has how much longer before they buy it? (Cut to a still of Frank’s family and ding with text saying “Until the end of the first act.” Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
Thought so. (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
 Howard soon discovers the identity of Frank Castle. Howard’s wife, Livia, played by Laura Harring, decides that Frank’s family has to buy it. Meanwhile, Frank’s son decided to gift his father with the trademark shirt. However, this is the last good thing in Frank’s life as… UH-OH! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
ORAC! SIGNAL EVERYONE TO HIT THE DIRT! (Klaxons blare as everyone grabs a helmet, with the exception of Chad Narducci)

Chad Narducci:
WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?! (Cut to the movie as bullets are flying, and it cuts to Chad Narducci)

Chad Narducci:
OH CRAP! WHAT’S GOING ON?! (Cut to James as he hides under his desk.)

TLOTA:
FRANK CASTLE’S FAMILY IS BUYING IT IN A STORM OF BULLETS BY HOWARD SAINT’S MEN! I THINK NOW IS THE TIME FOR A COMMERCIAL BREAK! (Cut to everyone else as they shout, “YA THINK?!” The scene fades to black it then cuts to the 0:36 mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James entirely morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings "The Last Of The Americans." Cut to the 0:36 mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme shows James entirely morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings "The Last Of The Americans." Cut to the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
So after a flurry of bullets and a truck running over Frank’s wife and son. Frank is shot and presumed dead at the hands of Howard Saint’s men. Miraculously Frank survives and takes a few months to heal under the guidance of a local fisherman. With the FBI and local police afraid of retaliation from Saint, The Castle slaughter goes cold. We cut to months later as Frank returns to grab his weight in guns and weapons and, of course, the Skull shirt his son got for daddy. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And yeah, the new Skull shirt Frank has in the comics is an awful Rorschach image in comparison to the simplistic skull on the Punisher’s shirt. (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Frank sets up his new place in Florida with everything for his brand of Justice. Living with Spacker Dave, played by Ben Foster, Bumpo, played by John Pinette, and Joan, played by Rebecca Romijn. As the first person on Frank’s list is Mickey played Eddie Jemison with Mickey thinking he’s getting hit with a blowtorch! When in reality, Frank is cooking himself a steak while hitting Mickey in the back with a popsicle. Turning on the Saints, Mickey becomes Frank’s inside man and spills on EVERYTHING about Howard Saint and his family. (Show Mickey telling everything about Howard, Livia, their living son Johnny Saint and Quentin Glass as we see he is homosexual. Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
So Glass is part of the LGBTQIA+ community, I’m fine with that! (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):

Frank sends Howard Saint the calling card that he is back and will take them on! Frank also decides to let the public know he’s disgusted with what is happening with his family’s murder case and is going to take matters into his own hands. His next move is to take several million dollars from some Cuban associates of Saint’s. After trying to drown his sorrows in Wild Turkey, one of Joan’s exes decides to come in and force himself onto Joan, ending with Frank beating him the way he deserves to be beaten. Meanwhile, Howard decides to put a bounty on Frank’s head. One day as Joan is working at a restaurant, Bumpo, Dave, and Frank get a bite as they're joined by a hitman named Harry Heck, played by Mark Collie the best way to describe Harry Heck is? Imagine Johnny Cash; instead of becoming one of the greatest Country musicians of all time, he became a badass hitman with a song for every single person on his list! That’s Harry Heck! (Show clip of Harry Heck playing “In Time”. Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
I was somewhat joking about that, but sometimes I can be accurate! (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Harry tries to kill Frank; however, Frank decides to bring a gas-pressured knife to a gunfight with Harry. During a money run, Frank decides to mine the money and the boat it was gonna ride on! Now going nuts over what Frank is doing to him, Howard decides to bring in his big gun! After a minor moment of the people in the building having dinner together, which includes an Ice Florentine. Frank meets Howard’s big gun, The Russian played by Kevin Nash! And the brawl they have, you have to see to believe.  (Show the brawl between The Russian and Frank. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Believe it or not, this fight nearly took the spot that the Iron Man vs. Rhodey battle in Iron Man 2 on my funniest fights list back in May of 2015 because when you try to balance the sheer, unadulterated violence of that brawl with Bumpo, Dave, and Joan making Ice Florentine with an Italian Operetta, it’s kind of silly. (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
That’s not to say that the brawl between the two doesn’t have its fair share of silly moments. Like when Frank’s face is saying, “Is this really happening?!” as The Russian picks him up like a rag doll or when Frank tosses a grenade, and The Russian decides to hit it out of the park and back to Frank is kind of ridiculous. Or when The Russian tries to break Frank’s head off his neck with the refrigerator’s door. Or when Frank tries to just straight up shoot the dude, The Russian takes a barbell and bends the barrel of the handgun, and Frank’s expression is basically saying, “For the love of peat moss, can’t I get a break?” which he does as he tosses a pot of boiling hot water onto The Russian’s face then hits the dude with a spear that’d give Roman Reigns, Bill Goldberg, and Edge a run for their money. The Russian dies, and Frank…? (Show the moment in which Frank collapses. Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
He might as well be after a beating like that! (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Frank gets stitched up just in time for Saint’s men to find where he’s living and to witness Dave’s loyalty by not saying anything but winds up getting all those piercings ripped out of his face. Finally, having had enough of Howard Saint, Frank makes a declaration of his intent to Punish Howard Saint once and for all! Starts off with Frank enacting his next step by sowing the seeds of distrust in Howard through Mickey as he hands photos of what appears to be Quentin Glass with Livia Saint and a pair of Earrings Howard gave to Livia. Howard decides to gut Quentin like a trout, and as for Livia, well… (Cut to Livia’s death. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Okay, something to note, in earlier prints of this scene, Livia’s scream of falling happened after the fall and before she dies via Train slaughter. So, they must have fixed it in the recent printings of the movie on either Blu-Ray or Digital. (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Howard Saint offers a reward to put Frank Castle out of his existence once and for all. However, Frank begins his final assault on Howard Saint’s existence. (Show clip of Frank Castle as he kills, and a death counter appears on the corner of the screen. At one point, the kill counter says, “Equal to a Rambo movie” as the numbers continue to climb as the bodies, the death counter says, “Equal to a John Wick Movie.” Cut to the movie as James continues his voiceover.) After that slaughter, Frank and Howard have one final confrontation where Frank wounds him and then blows up a strategic number of cars as Howard Saint is dragged to hell leaving behind the Skull logo and the smell of Lemon and Pine! Afterward, as it looks like Frank is about to end himself, a memory of his wife looking at him and begging not for Frank to end himself saves him from dying. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Which if he did could’ve avoided “War Zone,” Just saying there, Cochiese. (Cut to The Punisher as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
And with that, Frank decides to hit the road, leaving Joan, Bumpo, and Dave enough money to fix the place after the whopper of the brawl that happened earlier: telling Joan that they must look in the Obituaries if they want to find his handiwork! (Show clip of Frank Castle making his declaration and saying, “Frank Castle is Dead! Call me…The Punisher!” Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And that was The Punisher! It was possibly the most perfect movie to feature the character! (Cut to clips of the Thomas Jane PUNISHER movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
It balanced the ultra-violent attitude of the character with the grittiness it deserves. John Travolta definitely has a standout performance as Howard Saint. Balancing out the suave, sophistication, and subtle nuances with the violent and psychotic tendencies of Howard Saint. Thomas Jane perfectly encapsulates every ounce of Frank Castle in his performance. Honestly, you need to see this movie if you haven't seen it. It may have come out during a period when Comic Book movies weren’t where they aren’t now but trust me, this movie could come out today on a Streaming service, and it would be as awesome! I strongly suggest you find it and see a movie that is worth your enjoyment. (Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
Now, if you guys will excuse me, I have a Game Show pilot to direct and… (Cut to James as he goes to Chad’s office.) I happen to have the test audience reaction notes. Care to take a look, Chad? (Cut to Chad as he grabs them.)

Chad Narducci:
As a matter of fact, I would. (Mumbles to himself for a few seconds) “I had more fun sitting and watching a pilot based on the movie “Clerks” which was nothing like the movie” (Mumbles for a few seconds) “Would’ve had more fun watching a sitcom in which Adolf Hitler and Eva Braun lived next to Jewish neighbors?” (Chad tosses the notes to the table) Do you know something? I think I know what the problem is. It’s you; where’s your enthusiasm for trying new things?  (Cut to James as Chad continues to tell James that he is not creative or lacks the drive to succeed then it echoes as Chad says how much he made James and how much Chad has done and how much James owes Chad which becomes the straw that breaks James’ back and finally, after everything Chad has put James through, James drops the F-Bomb as it cuts to the First Presbyterian Church in Liberty NY as the clock tower bell rings then it cuts to downtown then to The Yaun house.)

Mr. & Mrs. Yaun (In unison):
My word that was the loudest profanity I ever heard! (Cut to James and Chad)

TLOTA:
I OWE YOU?! I OWE YOU?!! DO YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT LACK OF CREATIVITY? TALK ABOUT NO DRIVE TO SUCCEED?! TALK ABOUT HOW I LACK ENTHUSIASM?! YOU DICK! I VOLUNTARILY PROMOTED “LIFE AS A MERMAID”!  I COULD’VE STOPPED AFTER THE SEASON I HELPED WITH YOUR CROWDFUNDING PROJECT! AND I THOUGHT BECAUSE I WAS CLOSE ENOUGH WITH YOU GUYS, YOU COULD FUND SOMETHING I WANTED TO DO SINCE 2020! BUT YOU SHUT DOWN VALIDUS! YOU KNEW THAT MY PROJECT WOULD’VE KEPT YOUR COMPANY GOING INDEFINITELY! IT WOULD’VE LED TO ME BECOMING YOUR COMPANY’S MASCOT AND FINANCIAL WINDFALL WHICH WOULD HAVE LED TO YOU MAKING MORE SERIES, MORE MOVIES, MORE OF EVERYTHING YOU COULD’VE DONE, AND WOULD HAVE LED TO A GREAT BUSINESS PARTNERSHIP WITH JAMES DANIEL WALSH AND MANIC EXPRESSION.COM, SO HE AND EVERYONE ELSE COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO SUCCEED! BUT NO! YOU SHUT DOWN YOUR BUSINESS THE SECOND I COME AROUND WITH MY PROJECTS! YOU WANT TO DO YOUR THING? THEN FORM A SUBSIDIARY COMPANY THROUGH MINE! YOU DESTROYED MY REPUTATION FOR QUALITY WORK AND RELIABLE SERVICE! HOW DARE YOU! I HAVE BENT OVER BACKWARDS TO APPEASE YOU, AND WHAT HAS THAT LED ME TO?! IT HAS LED ME TO BAD RELATIONSHIPS WITH MY FAMILY! I HAVE HEALTH PROBLEMS! I HAVE TO HEAR EVERYONE COMPLAIN ABOUT WHAT HAS BEEN GOING ON! AND BECAUSE I HAVE NO SAY OR ABILITY TO STOP YOU. I HAVE BEEN TRYING LIKE HELL TO REGAIN THE POWER SO I CAN GET THINGS DONE, NARDUCCI! (Julia Alexa Miller walks in and shouts “ENOUGH!” with James and Chad being thrown to separate corners in the office.)

Julia Alexa Miller:
Chad, we’ve been friends for so long but you push James hard enough and this will be the least he does to hurt you. And you James, earlier this year, you asked me if you have become a joke and I can now honestly say, “YES!”.  (Chad says “HA!” in the background) SHUT UP! And I can say that because you are becoming no different than every other dinosaur in your vocation. And I understand that evolving is hard. But it has to happen to you just like the rest of the world. I’ve seen this happen before, with me! Did I want to direct Life As A Mermaid forever? No. I wanted to do more, which includes photography and the photo tutorials. I evolved; everything is evolving, even the powers inside of me. Why aren’t you trying to evolve?

TLOTA:
I have been busting my ass for nine years. I have had setbacks and times when I wanted to give up. I have been trying to evolve. Everyone wants me to evolve, I get that, but I need support. I want to get the next level, but I need everyone on my team to help ease the transition. I also need to get my big project off the ground. If you want to help, then do so. If not, let go of the ownership of my production company so I can get things done, otherwise I will shut down everything by the end of the year!

"Public Enemies" Number One and two "Superman & Batman"

(Opening begins at the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators' original run play. The camera pulls back to see James and everyone else on top of a slab with the words "The Last Of The Americans" on it before cutting to James in his office)

TLOTA:
I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views that I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. Outside of the Live-Action movies, I think I am a little harsh on D.C. Comics and the media they are producing. (Cut to clips of Superman & Lois, The Flash, Supergirl, Legends Of Tomorrow, Black Lightning, and Arrow as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
I mean, a lot of their series are good. Arrow had a lot of fantastic episodes. Black Lightning was a good series; part of the reason I'm doing this review is to see if we can get Legends Of Tomorrow back and continue. Melissa Benoist and her Supergirl Series were a big reason I can like Supergirl again. Even though The Flash is still going, I think it has lost a lot of its speed. But a highlight for me is Superman & Lois because it's not a Superman series in the usual sense. It's a drama about a family who had to uproot themselves to discover who they truly are and where they fit in. And for my money, Tyler Hoechlin is KILLING it as Superman and Clark Kent, who have to try and be there for his wife Lois Lane, played by Elizabeth "Bitsie" Tulloch, and twin sons Jonathan and Jordan, played by Jordan Elsass, and Alex Garfin. You need to see the series if you haven't seen it. (Cut to the DC Animated movies as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Also in this column of really great entertainment which has continued to be of quality work are their straight-to Blu-Ray, DVD & Digital Animated movies. Many of them remain some of my favorites, including Batman: Mask Of The Phantasm, Batman Beyond: Return Of The Joker, The Death, and Return Of Superman. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
 There is a movie that forces Superman and Batman to work together to clear their names after a corrupt President Luthor declares them public enemies No. 1 & 2. I'll let you figure out which is which. (Cut to Title Card for Superman/Batman Public Enemies, then to clips of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Superman/Batman Public Enemies is based on the comic book storyline series at the time involving the two and Lex Luthor as the President of our country. And given the Presidents we've been dealing with, He may just be the least evil choice in the history of Presidential Electorates, which is saying something impossible. But what is it that forces Superman and Batman to team up and find out what in the Samuel Langford Hell is going on! And how without question, they have to defy a Government to protect a planet. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Let's not waste time; this is Superman/Batman Public Enemies! (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The movie opens as we hear about how our country has gone to hell just as Lex Luthor announces his candidacy for the presidency, and yeah, this movie must have had a crystal ball because the people thought the Devil you know is better than the one that screwed you several times over as guess what?! Lex wins in a landslide! He then suggests all the Superheroes sign on to work for him. He gets Black Lightning, played by LeVar Burton,  Captain Atom, played by Xander Berkley, Major Force, played by Ricardo Antonio Chavira, and Power Girl, played by... (Cut to James physically as he looks up and sees who plays Power Girl)

TLOTA:
ONE ORDER OF UNCOMFORTABLENESS, PLEASE! (Cut to stills of Chloe Sullivan from Smallville and Allison Mack as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
So yeah, I had to talk about Smallville a few years ago, defending it. I also had to break character to try and handle the situation that Allison Mack, who played Chloe Sullivan on Smallville, was involved in. Once the series ended, she found herself in a career freefall, then found herself in a Sex Cult, and was arrested for trafficking. At the time, I was somewhat hopeful she would be able to get her life and career back on track. While it did take time to do so, and I wished her the best, I was lambasted for it and my defense of the show/loving the finale. That being said, I will try to be as objective in this review as her character and in the movie.  (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
That being said, let's get back to the review. (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
 We cut to a few months down the road as things have been looking up as Superman, played by Tim Daly, stops a common crime as Luthor's hired heroes to come by to try to convince Superman that Lex is not as bad. However, after fighting Lex for so long, Superman would rather hang out with The Friggin Joker than trust Lex Luthor! Meanwhile, Lex and the Government discover an asteroid made of Kryptonite that's gonna hit our planet, and judging by the sheer size of the sucker, this one makes the one from Armageddon look tiny in comparison.  (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And since Bruce Willis is now out of action permanently, there's no drilling team to save the day. There are only the heroes of DC to call upon...(Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
So yeah, Luthor decides to hold a press conference to see if Superman will help. And it's here Batman voiced by Kevin Conroy, verifies that this Kryptonite asteroid is massive and not even with enough Lead from every Nuclear power plant, Hospital, and every ounce mined out of the earth wouldn't help Superman. So it is with great reluctance that Superman meets with Luthor and his bodyguard Metallo as played by... (Show a pic of John C. McGinley from Scrubs. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Wow, this is actually going to give me the ability to use at least nine years worth of accumulated backlogged hours of Dr. Cox clips.(Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Lex tells Metallo to stop Superman and (Cut to Dr. Cox "Whack-A-Newbie" audio clip as Metallo begins to fight Superman). Metallo has the upper hand, and instead of continuing on the battle (Cut to Dr. Cox audio clip of him saying "Ladies and Gentlemen, Man Not Caring!" then an audio clip of Dr. Cox making a blaring noise as the fight continues. The fight continues as Metallo breaks out the heavy-duty weapons as Dr. Cox says "I guarantee your life will come to an abrupt and very unnatural end". Metallo tosses Superman as the sound of Dr. Cox's disturbing chuckle happens, and Metallo gets up as the Dr. Cox clip of him saying "Hi Honey!") As Superman gets up to try to think of his next move, Metallo hunts Superman as Batman joins the fray. (Show the fight continuing as Dr. Cox Audio clip of him saying, "OKAY! NOW JUST BECAUSE JORDAN THINKS IT'S CUTE THAT YOU'RE VIOLATING HER LITTLE SISTER, IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN USE MY GUEST ROOM FOR YOUR NERDY G-RATED SEXCAPADES! AND OH MY GOD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY LITTLE BOY? YOU SICK, SICK BASTARD! FILTHY BOY! FILTHY GIRL! FILTHY GIRL!"  Metallo shoots Superman and is stuck with bombs as Dr. Cox audio clip of him whistling "Super" as an explosion happens, and Metallo then buries Superman and Batman.) Batman and Superman are buried as the dialogue between them become almost Tarantino-esque. While I would love to hear a full audio moment of Tim Daly and Kevin Conroy doing the whole Jules and Vincent opening monologues from Pulp Fiction one day, I know where my focus has to be as Metallo is confronted by someone lurking in the shadows. (Show clip of Metallo as the Dr. Cox audio clip of him saying "Worth it" plays. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Wow, that got me... (James looks in a box) EGADS! I only made a small dent in the accumulated backlogged hours of Dr. Cox Clips. Well, here's hoping I find more clips for Dr. Cox to give me pleasure. I can think of one, but I will hold out until the end. (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Batman and Superman make it back to the Batcave, where Alfred heals them up, and it's there they hear Luthor's latest press conference where he discovered Metallo Barbequed and then puts it squarely on Superman's shoulders, saying somehow The Kryptonite Meteorite's radiation exposure has made him Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs and has put a billion dollar bounty on the Man of Steel! Superman and Batman will have to figure out how to stop the meteor while fighting everyone off the bounty, how Metallo bit the dust, and how to clear their names before it becomes too late. Power Girl tries to rationalize how in the years since becoming President, Luthor has done his job. Superman and Batman make it to STAR Labs as they find out that someone with radioactive heat vision is the culprit of Metallo's demise. However, they don't have much time to figure that part out as guards and supervillains come out of the woodwork to get their hands on Superman and Batman. Even the Silver Banshee is out there to get her hands on Superman. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And for those who are wondering why Silver Banshee's sonic screams aren't affecting me... Well, have you seen my reviews where Alex gets angry and fricassees either myself or someone else? (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):

With literally everyone, including Mr. Kitch Nsink coming out to collect the bounty. Captain Atom and the other Luthor-employed heroes come to arrest Superman. However, it's round 428 as Batman must take on Luthor's heroes, and somehow in the process, it's discovered that Major Force was the one to turn Metallo into Slag! Major Force goes on the attack as his suit is ruptured by a punch from Power Girl. Captain Atom absorbs the power before it turns Metropolis into a crater! Meanwhile, Luthor's Missile plans work about as well as Deep Impact did after coming out after Armageddon. Luthor tells the people, not to panic, which is the same as ringing a dinner bell for chaos! Superman and Batman make it to the hideout just as OH NO! NOT SHAZAM AND HAWKMAN?! Didn't they hear from Black Lightning, Katana, or anyone that Superman wasn't the one to 86 Metallo? Whatever is going on, Superman and Batman fight Hawkman and Shazam as Amanda Waller, played by CCH Pounder, discovers that Lex Luthor has been doing some Kryptonite juicing, which has made him go even further round the bend carrying a DecaOctotrillion ton of Crazy with him. However, as Lex tries to talk to Shazam and Hawkman, it is, in fact, Superman and Batman incognito wanting the data on the meteor. However, Luthor deletes it instead. Remember, he's gone cuckoo; on the other hand, Waller had a backup for Batman and Waller's mutual associate. Waller tries to arrest Luthor however, even though he's cuckoo, it doesn't mean he's stupid as he has his Supersuit ready just in case. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Again, this is Lex Luthor we're talking about, so yeah. He would have it at his beck and call. (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):

Superman and Batman make it to Japan, where they meet Hiro, AKA The Toyman, to help with stopping the asteroid. Having little time, Hiro puts together a mecha zord combination of Superman and Batman as the device to destroy the asteroid! (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA:
Now imagine that! A Mecha Superman/Batman Zord! That is so many levels of awesome! (Cut to Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):

But leave it to the Cuckoo train that it is President Lex Luthor to come in and try to stop them. With the autopilot Kaput, Batman decides to make the hero play and launches The SuperBatman Megazord into the asteroid! Pissed that Batman is going to die because of Luthor. The kid gloves come off as Superman, and Luthor fights it out again! Superman knocks Luthor's super suit off in pieces, then tells the President, He's just been impeached! As the Asteroid is reduced to dust, Power Girl tells Superman there is a chance that Batman may have survived, and by may have, that means "Of course, he did!" as Superman helps Batman land the Batjet with Superman Logo on it. The two are cleared of Metallo's murder, Luthor is thrown into prison until he is impeached and imprisoned, and Batman returns to the shadows as Lois and Superman enjoy the first new morning together. (Cut to James physically) 

TLOTA:
And that was Superman/Batman Public Enemies. It was awesome, and I loved it. (Cut to clips of Superman/Batman: Public Enemies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
While looking like a combo of a Saturday Morning Cartoon and Weekday Afternoon Anime, the animation is awesome. The voice acting is superb, and the action was awesome. The dialogue between Superman and Batman was very well handled, especially since Kevin Conroy, Tim Daly, and Clancy Brown have known their parts for so long that they fit like a glove. If you haven't seen it, what are you waiting for? Get it on DVD, Blu-Ray, or even Digital and witness two of DC's greatest defend their names against a President who sold us a bill of goods. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And just so I can get it out of me, that while many of you think the last guy in the office is the reason for everything going to hell. Let me get this out right here, right now, every little thing that is going wrong is happening under the current administration, and BOY, When we choose poorly, we deserve what is happening! So it is here I give you this Dr. Cox clip. (Show clip of Dr. Cox's "I Told You So" Dance. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Man, I've wanted to use that clip. I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans, and that's my opinion!

The Different Cuts of "Rocky IV"

(Scene starts with a laser beam in the sky as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as four shadowed figures with a lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving towards the camera, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left, and John and Mike Santos, and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward moving towards the camera, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left, and Olivia Horvath appears in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written by James Faraci, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions” as it ends the Laser beam disappears and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the laser beam cut out the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appear. At the 0:32-0:36 mark, the word “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down, and James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into the frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans with James Daniel Walsh on his right with half of team TLOTA and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Fade cut to James in his office.)

TLOTA:
I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and The views I’m about to express are that of my own and some of yours. And hey-yo! It’s time for The Different Cuts! (Whistling version of “The Lumberjack Song” is heard as Team TLOTA dressed as Lumberjacks see a gigantic piece of film celluloid and James chops it down and the other members cut it to different lengths and on the ends sticking out of the back of the truck the words “The Different Cuts” are seen in differing syllables. Cut to clips from the ROCKY/CREED movies as “Eye Of The Tiger” by Survivor plays in the foreground and James does voiceovers.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The ROCKY movies and its continuation movie series CREED have been quite a solidly entertaining story. With the ROCKY movies it told the tale of an underdog boxer named Rocky Balboa played by Sylvester Stallone as he was given a chance to go for the World Heavyweight Championship against Apollo Creed played by Carl Weathers and the sequels in real-time showed Rocky’s Rise, Fall, and Redemption with who he is and, in the interim, becomes a champion, celebrity, and ultimately Robert “Rocky” Balboa. The continuation movie series CREED tells the tale of Adonis Johnson, a child born of wedlock to Apollo Creed, and his tale of trying to discover who he is by going into the ring and seeing if he is his father’s son or if Adonis is his own man as he should be. The Sequel to Creed sees him dealing with demons of his dad’s and Rocky’s past in the form of the son of Ivan Drago, Viktor played by Florian Munteanu. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And Ivan was the challenge that sealed the fates of so many in ROCKY IV! (Cut to the title card from the trailer of Rocky IV then to clips of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
While critically it did not do as well as the first three, Rocky IV remains to this day the most commercially successful movie in the entire Rocky franchise. And to celebrate the success of Creed II, Sylvester Stallone decided to release a director’s cut of the film. Interesting choice seeing as how Stallone was the Writer and Director of Rocky IV. But after both the pandemic and other delays in 2021 Rocky IV: Rocky vs Drago was released on digital and it is one of the best directors’s cut’s of a movie I have seen since The Lord Of The Rings Special Editions. And that is a statement I don’t make lightly. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And today, we’re going to decide which movie is the better cut in the four rounds. Our first round is the plot! (Cut to dual opening points on Blu-Ray covers which turns to the front of the covers the Blu-Rays the one on the right showing the Classic Rocky IV cover and the one of the left showing the Rocky IV: Rocky vs Drago cover. The two covers collide and explode and the words “THE PLOT” appear in the title font of the trailer of Rocky IV as the first forty-eight seconds of Eye Of The Tiger by Survivor plays in the foreground. Cut to the different cuts of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Inspired by the stories of the battles between Joe Louis and Max Schmeling and the political heat between the Countries. Ivan Drago as a peaceful ambassador wants to take on a goodwill exhibition with Rocky Balboa. However, Apollo Creed wanted to try to start a comeback which ends in tragedy as Ivan Drago ends Apollo Creed in the exhibition in Las Vegas! Wanting justice for what happened to Apollo, Rocky goes to the USSR in a non-sanctioned fight to put Ivan Drago down in the ring!  But which one set this event up in the right direction? To be honest, I have to give it to the Drago cut. Nothing against the classic version. It just wasn’t well set up if you ask me. The original set up Rocky’s life which included his son this time played under a Pseudonym by Seargeoh Stallone, who is Sylvester’s other son, and how the Drago stuff was poorly set up. The Drago cut has the fights better set up and shows the friendship that started in the turning point of Rocky III and developed between III and IV. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And with that, the first round goes to Drago cut! (Cut to the original version’s poster on the left of the screen and the Drago cut on the right with one Boxing glove on the poster while the first twenty seconds of “Hearts On Fire” by John Cafferty. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Now we move on to what has become the most heated part of this movie’s differences, Editing! (Cut to dual opening points on Blu-Ray covers which turn to the front of the covers the Blu-Rays the one on the right showing the Classic Rocky IV cover and the one on the left showing the Rocky IV: Rocky vs Drago cover. The two covers collide and explode and the words “EDITING” appear in the title font of the trailer of Rocky IV as the first forty-eight seconds of Eye Of The Tiger by Survivor plays in the foreground. Cut to the different cuts of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
I have to say that the editing is as different as night and day and there are Spoilers here, you have been warned. While the original version is mostly montages and fights as is the Drago cut. There’s no major difference in time but there is in tone. The opening has changed, where the original picked up at the end of Rocky III before moving towards what happens with Rocky and his life, The Drago Cut gives us the start of the timeline of their friendship, shows us where the two had grown, and sets up Apollo’s character arc at this point. The fight between Apollo and Drago while ending the same way with Apollo buying the farm but, in the Drago cut, it was as brutal but this cut did give Apollo a fighting chance. And in the original version towards the end of the fight, Duke, played by Tony Burton is begging Rocky to throw the towel and Apollo grunts out one last “No” or two. In the Drago Cut, Duke’s pleads comes seconds before that fatal knockout blow, so he didn’t even have the chance to question what to do. And Ivan gloats a bit more. The Funeral is different as well. Where Rocky was stoic as he tells what Apollo meant to him. In the Drago Cut, he is barely able to speak because he’s had at this point been through a lot with Apollo, first as rivals in Rocky and Rocky II, then as friends in Rocky III and this movie. Then there is the added scene of Rocky and The Boxing Commission considering what to do next, especially with somewhat despondent Rocky blaming himself for the death of Apollo. Because in the original version, this moment was briefly seen as photos setting up the press conference between Rocky and Drago. That’s another part of this that I have to talk about. While the original had more moments of Ludmilla, played by Brigitte Nielsen, doing the speaking for her husband, because, at the time, Stallone was engaged to Nielsen and probably gave the role as a way of supporting her. Well in the Drago cut with the exception of a few lines have been scrubbed out of the movie, partly due to the fact that two years after the movie was released Stallone and Nielsen were divorced. Also scrubbed out is most of Burt Young’s performance of Paulie as has the robot that was used for the movie, because, I swear upon heaven and earth this is true, Seargeoh Stallone is Autistic and apparently this robot was used to help him with his Autism.  (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Which now has opened a can of worms for me. (James pulls out his Morpher and reverts back to being James Faraci)

James Faraci:
In the mid-1990s, I was diagnosed with Autism myself, specifically, Asperger’s, which is a high-functioning form of Autism. However, I have never let that be my defining trait about me. I consider myself, A very dependable worker, A College Student, An Uncle to three, A great-uncle to baby Kinsleigh, A man who is trying so hard to get a project I have been working on that it is killing me slowly, and A wonderful cook, A Son and someone who is trying to get everything in his life together! As well as an Internet Reviewer. Being Autistic will never define me.  Now with that said… (James pulls out his Morpher and becomes The Last Of The Americans again.)

TLOTA:
Let’s get back at it with the editing. (Cut to the different cuts of Rocky IV as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The Classic is more recognizable for a lot. MTV music video style editing and Montage, Apollo Creed’s death is brutal, Cold War ideology, and not much is different. The Montages are also a little different. The No Way Out segment where Rocky tries to understand his grief isn’t as slick as the MTV music video it’s supposed to be in the original. The scenes of the past take on more blue, darker hues and are grainier the Drago cut. The training montages are also different. Rocky’s first training montage is composed of different takes if not moments that probably work better in the Drago cut. The fight between Rocky and Drago is different at the beginning and the end. While the fight between the two in the original cut and Drago Cut is the same, for the most part. One moment where Rocky is knocked down and much like in Rocky Balboa tells himself through inner monologue as to what to do next after a near knockdown and the montage between the end of the second round and the final round is nearly identical, just some technical aspects of the fighting choreography and it feels less like the MTV music video in the original. While the fight itself ends in the same way. The speech feels different. In the Original cut, he gives the speech about how change can be a good thing and wishes his son a Merry Christmas. Did I forget that this fight takes place at Christmas time? Better late than never. Then we come to the Drago cut of the speech where it feels as impactful it ends with Rocky shaking Drago’s hand and walking out of the ring while “Eye Of The Tiger” by Survivor plays in the foreground. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA:
So which one takes this round? This one is going to have to go to the Judges. (Cut to Paulo Fonseca, Nick Yaun, and Eric Kurtzke at a table discussing which version between the two cuts)

Nick Yaun:
After much discussion which includes all the differences, we have a split decision! (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
HOW?! (Cut to Eric Kurtzke)

Eric Kurtzke:
After watching both cuts, I think the classic version is the best-edited version. Paulo? (Cut to Paulo Fonseca.)

Paulo Fonseca:
I actually found the Drago cut the better-edited version because it felt like how Sylvester Stallone would have done it if he could’ve had more say. Nick? (Cut to Nick Yaun)

Nick Yaun:
The two cuts were so good; that I could not decide which one is best. (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
So in this case both get the point. (Cut to the original version’s poster with one Boxing Glove on the poster on the left of the screen and the Drago cut on the right with Two Boxing gloves on the poster while the first twenty seconds of “Hearts On Fire” by John Cafferty. Cut to James physically as a bell rings)

TLOTA:
Okay, the first half of the review is over; I need to take a break. I need a rubdown and some water. We’ll be back.

(The scene fades to black it then cuts to the 0:36 mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James entirely morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings "The Last Of The Americans." Cut to the 0:36 mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme shows James entirely morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings "The Last Of The Americans." Cut to James as he is getting rubbed down by his team, given inspirational messages by Alex, and taking a swig of water and a bell ring as everyone disperses.)

TLOTA:
Okay, okay, I’m ready to go again. And now it’s time for the Cast and characters! (Cut to dual opening points on Blu-Ray covers which turn to the front of the covers the Blu-Rays the one on the right showing the Classic Rocky IV cover and the one on the left showing the Rocky IV: Rocky vs Drago cover. The two covers collide and explode and the words “CAST & CHARACTERS” appear in the title font of the trailer of Rocky IV as the first forty-eight seconds of Eye Of The Tiger by Survivor plays in the foreground. Cut to the different cuts of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Talk about a great cast brought together by great storytelling. Sylvester Stallone who wrote and directed this movie as well as Rocky II, III, & Rocky Balboa, Talia Shire as Adrian, Carl Weathers as Apollo Creed, Burt Young as Paulie, Dolph Lundgren as Ivan Drago, Tony Burton as Duke, Brigitte Nelson as Ludmilla and so many others. But which one did this cast use better? Well as I said in the editing segment that while Brigitte was scrubbed out as was most of the Drago cut as was Burt Young’s Paulie, The Robot, among other characters. However, (Cut to Team TLOTA as they say “To Be Fair” in the same way Letterkenny does it as it cuts back to the movie as James does a voiceover.) Dolph getting more screen time and showing that Drago has more personality and depth isn’t a bad thing. This is where the Drago cut shines. And the cast did a great job, this is where the original Rocky IV shows its age as the cast have to handle the situation in the same way, and to me, the less is more gives Drago a mystique that Rocky had to break in the ring. Part of what keeps people watching this and quoting/referencing this is the performances. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Which gives the edge to the Original. Nothing against The Drago cut but for me, I enjoyed the classic and when we get to the final round We’ll discuss why. And for me, the point goes to the original cut.

(Cut to the original version’s poster with Two Boxing Gloves on the poster on the left of the screen and the Drago cut on the right with Two Boxing gloves on the poster while the first twenty seconds of “Hearts On Fire” by John Cafferty. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
We’re tied up in the points, so this is going to the final round, The Re-Watch Factor!

(Cut to dual opening points on Blu-Ray covers which turns to the front of the covers the Blu-Rays the one on the right showing the Classic Rocky IV cover and the one of the left showing the Rocky IV: Rocky vs Drago cover. The two covers collide and explode and the words “Re-Watch Factor” appear in the title font of the trailer of Rocky IV as the first forty-eight seconds of Eye Of The Tiger by Survivor plays in the foreground. Cut to the different cuts of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The classic version has been in the pop culture lexicon for so long, it has the Re-Watch Factor without question. The Drago cut is a unique retelling of this movie. Showing Drago as someone who is the total package in the Drago cut is interesting and is the best retelling of Rocky IV. But it needs time to get to the point of the original cut. What made both versions of this movie incredible wasn’t the fight which according to the trailer for the Drago Cut was voted “The Greatest Fight in Cinematic History”, where that was? I don’t know but it was voted as such. It was the realistic views and when you watch the Drago cut, the views seemed a little less realistic but it was ultimately felt as less than the original. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And as cheesy and as corny as the classic was, it still remains an amazing movie from the 1980s that aged well. It’s that age that gives the Classic cut the win in this fight.

(Cut to the original version’s poster with Three Boxing Gloves on the poster on the left of the screen and the Drago cut on the right with Two Boxing gloves on the poster while the first twenty seconds of “Hearts On Fire” by John Cafferty. Cut to the final round of Rocky vs Drago with Rocky’s gloves pummeling away at the Drago cut and Rocky gets the knockout. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Now as for my thoughts on the future of the Creed movies and the character of Rocky Balboa. Well… (Cut to clips of CREED & CREED II as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
After seeing Adonis Creed come out from the shadows of what he felt was something he didn’t know he wanted because of his father’s legacy and what he has ultimately become creating his own legacy. It’s safe to say that there is no need for Rocky Balboa to be in his corner as it was Illustrated in Creed II as Rocky told Adonis that it was his time and sat back down relaxed and then we find Adonis going to his father’s grave saying how it was now his legacy and introduced Apollo to his Granddaughter and Rocky makes the pilgrimage to see not only Robert but also to see his grandson, Logan. And because Rocky creator Sylvester Stallone has said that CREED II was his final movie as Rocky Balboa. I think it would be a good plot point in the third movie for Robert and Adonis to meet, Robert to tell Adonis about Rocky passing away quietly and surrounded by his loving son and grandchildren. And that would cause Adonis to examine how and when he would be at the point Rocky was when Adonis got Rocky in his corner. Whatever happens, We know the legacy of Rocky and Creed is Gonna Fly Now and forever. (Cut to James physically in Boxing gear.)

TLOTA:
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got something to do. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and that’s my opinion. (James gets up as we see Chad Narducci in one corner of a Boxing Ring and James in the other as John Ross Santos comes into the ring.)

John Ross Santos:
Ladies and Gentlemen, we welcome you to this winner take all fight. In the White Corner, “The Man” Chad NARDUCCI! (Crickets chirp) and in the red corner, he is “The Last Of The Americans” James Benjamin FARACI! (A roar of people cheers James) Our referee, Ed Champion.

Ed Champion:
I want a good clean fight! Obey my commands at all times! Watch your body punches, kidney punches, rabbit punches, and Low Blows. And remember I am fair yet firm. Touch gloves and get it on! (The fighters touch gloves and the bell rings as James and Chad dance around as the punches connect The Scene freeze frames in the same way as Rocky III. Fade To Black)

What is Star Trek Syndrome?

(Opening begins at the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators' original run play. The camera pulls back to see James and everyone else on top of a slab with the words "The Last Of The Americans" on it before cutting to James in his office)

TLOTA:
I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views that I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. We're all aware of the movie Galaxy Quest. Cut to the title card of Galaxy Quest, then to the movie clips as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
And it is considered the definitive spoof of the Star Trek franchise; however, I think it is more of a semi-autobiographical look at the cast members of the original series! It surprises me every time how much I feel for the actors playing these actors who have to make a living dressed up as their characters just to make ends meet and when things get real, yeah, you could tell that they were fish out of water when real aliens ask them to play the characters for real. Now, don't get me wrong. I love Galaxy Quest, it's funny, but it is also where I discovered something that became more prevalent in Star Trek and many long-running series that have gained both infamy and an eternal fan base. I call this phenomenon Star Trek Syndrome. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
What is Star Trek Syndrome? Well, multiple elements are involved with this Syndrome; one of the better-known elements involves displeasure with their fellow cast members in one form or another. I call this element, "Shatner Shmuckdom"! (Cut to different clips of William Shatner as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
While it is clear that many, if not all, the surviving cast and crew members of the original Star Trek series have a hatred for William Shatner, and if they are still ambulatory and alive when Shatner finally kicks the cosmic bucket for real, they would love to piss on his corpse before lowering it into the ground or pissing on his ashes after he's cremated for all the perceived wrongs he's done and I am certain at least ninety-five percent of these have some basis of what really happened behind the scenes and also may have to do with the fact that, even though he like the rest of the cast was type cast, Another element of the Syndrome which I will get to later on in this editorial, he was able to get work in local diner theaters while actors like Walter Koenig and George Takei had to take anything they could to make ends meet, another part of the element of "Shatner Schmuckdom" is how the star feels about the fan base, one thing about Shatner very few know is that he is a prolific writer, no questions about it, but when you write a book called GET A LIFE! and direct it towards the fandom that helped you get to where you are, you forfeit most of your audience's sympathy especially when you can't make it to the funeral of someone who you called your best friend later on in life after causing the poor man to be drunk after dealing with you during a day of filming of the original Star Trek Series. Yeah, Shatner, I'm willing to bet Leonard Nimoy's family members still want to give you a kick in the Shatner sack at Warp Speed.  (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Now I am not one to say that Shatner didn't have his low points in his career because we all do and it comes mostly from another element that has two versions in the Syndrome, in Hollywood terms, it is known as Typecasting, this is an element I call "Zerosight" (Cut to series that have had longevity after the series had ended as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
The first version involves an enemy to all men, the Hollywood version. Apparently for an industry about "Inclusion of all people" & "Has a very open view of the world"  it is amazing how Hollywood and the casting directors have such a narrow perspective,  When the series Gilligan's Island was unceremoniously canceled by network execs who folded like wallets because the network's boss loved the series Gunsmoke and literally,  no one, and I mean NO ONE, was able to work for years outside of minor roles and parodying themselves and Adam West had to embrace the campy insanity of his interpretation of Batman at one point he was shot out of a cannon at a state fair, it was at that moment he chose to find better representation that led to the roles he got! Even his role in Family Guy was because he decided to embrace a caricature of his past self and this is not an uncommon situation. Cast members of shows like Star Trek, Power Rangers, Baywatch, and other shows and movies earned the infamy, and the fan base seems to have cast members that can't get away from the characters they've been known for, and Hollywood Zerosight is relentlessly bad! (Cut to BH90210 as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
This is something the short-lived series BH90210 tried to satire; the surviving members of the cast of Beverly Hills 90210 had an incident at a convention that caused them to reevaluate their personal and professional futures and had they kept their tongue-in-cheek humor about the situations they were in and put the drama on the backburner and not tried to recapture the series they had done, then not only would it have been better for the series in the long-run, it would've also lasted a lot longer, However, this is what happened when Hollywood gives actors who had been successful but then quickly gives them the boot after they had their success ends  Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Then, of course, we have the version of "Zerosight" that we the fans have, and as much as Hollywood's version is terrible, Fans have the worst version of it, which I have called "Entitled Zerosight,"  Cut to all sorts of fans from different fandoms as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Don't get me wrong, I love my fans. If they want a photo, I will gladly give them a photo they want an autograph; I will sign whatever they want me to sign. I would gladly do everything within reason for my fans, but WOW, fans can turn at the drop of an idea, and it still is happening with Star Wars fans giving tsouris to actors and directors in the Disney Era Star Wars. Thank Anson Mount, AKA Black Bolt from the failed Inhumans series, and Captain Christopher Pike on Star Trek Strange New Worlds for defending the actress Moses Ingram in the new Obi-Wan Kenobi series on Disney Plus. When one fandom is saying to fans of another fandom you're going too far, things are really cuckoo. Still, there are fans of Mako Mermaids who liked the final season and agreed with my thoughts on the series. Still, for every fan like that, at least one thousand haters are screaming, "How dare that person, or those persons, or that company do something that I would like but I don't want to because it means I have to adapt what I want to their tastes." However, you need to change your attitudes with the times; I'm not saying you should give up the core of who you are. Just incorporate whatever new elements are coming and keep what works and if it doesn't suit you, then change that element to work for you  (Cut to clips of Power Rangers Megaforce/Super Megaforce as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
This is one of the reasons Power Rangers Megaforce/Super Megaforce FAILED miserably with both newer and old school fans. instead of trying to give us stories of the rangers and or how they connect to the past rangers and or how to develop the characters, story, or anything that had to do with making a series, let alone a Power Rangers series celebrating their 20th season on T.V.!  (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And this leads to another element of Star Trek Syndrome, An element that involves producers and some of the most insane, if not impossibly, wholly unintelligible ideas known to man! I call this element "Executive Paranoiac"  Cut to stills of George Lucas, Gene Roddenberry, and other creators as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Now, this is common with writers, producers, and directors. Gene Roddenberry quit after the second season as the showrunner and head writer on Star Trek. While he did write for the series and tried to do more, as much as what has come out about the guy, I have to say some of the problems that season had was because Fred Freiberger had other writers make edits to the scripts that would've been more unintelligible and possibly unwatchable because Gene was bitter over what was going. That bitterness may have led to the eventual degradation of his sanity. Now I believe that Roddenberry was a visionary but had his issues, which led to some of the ideas he had to put on the back burner until his passing, like Earth Final Conflict or Andromeda. However, his ideas for Star Trek movies after Star Trek The Motion Picture were outrageously insane, including the JFK Assassination and Klingons. There were even stories during times of the Original series. He wanted the cast to be predominantly female, not because he was a feminist but because he wanted to turn the Starship Enterprise into his own Orgy palace, if you vomited in your mouth as much as I did, then Mazel Tov, Star Trek lost a lot of its credibility  And in Roddenberry's case, he was the most extreme version of this element, the least powerful version of the component involves, of all people, George Lucas (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
I know, I'm in shock as well, but just look at the original trilogy and the prequels of the Star Wars movies (Cut to clips of the Star Wars Original Trilogy and Prequels as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
He knew what he wanted in those movies. He wanted to tell this story, he had his vision of these movies. Even when Irvin Kirshner had the director's chair for Empire Strikes Back and Richard Marquand took that chair in Return Of The Jedi, George had the final say on how the story of those movies because they told the stories of Luke Skywalker, his sister Leia Organa, The rogue Rebellion Captain Han Solo and the redemption of Anakin Skywalker after being a destructive evil known as Darth Vader. So when the prequels happened George knew what his plan was. Episode One, Introduces Anakin and the conflict that would ultimately start his change to becoming Darth Vader. Episode Two, Introduce the Clone Wars that would destroy the Republic and further the conflict that would send Anakin down the dark side. Episode Three had to show the destruction of the Jedi, Complete Anakin's fall to the dark side, Show the birth of both Luke & Leia and see the rise of the Galactic Empire. Did it do it well and effectively? Not really but as time has gone on and people who now do reactions to movies have seen the movies as better than those we gave them credit for.  (Cut to the Disney Skywalker Trilogy as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Plus they're a lot more coherent in terms of Story and Characters than how the Disney trilogy and the movie SOLO: A Star Wars Story. There wasn't so much a focus on the story or the old and new characters. Rather, there was a feeling of we'll put these characters we can't fit into anything else into this movie, put stories we couldn't fit into anything else, and see if we can fit the Star Wars Characters into these stories. The only exemptions from this problem is Rogue One: A Star Wars Story, The Mandalorian, Book Of Boba Fett, and Obi-Wan Kenobi. Maybe because there was more emphasis on the stories of main characters and how their stories go from where they began in the Star Wars movies to where they'd be in their own stories or in the case of The Mandalorian how that story can connect to the Star Wars movies. While Lucas isn't involved in what Disney is doing, he is aware of the "Entitled Zerosight" of what is known as the Fandom Menace. (Cut to Seth MacFarlane and The Orville as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O.):
One of the things that keep many from the Roddenberry & Lucas ends of the spectrum and using their creative ideas to create genius productions is to have the right people help focus the creative on the right aspects. One person in the center of the spectrum is Seth MacFarlane. While yes his animated series Family Guy & American Dad have lost their luster, Seth keeps them going for the fans while venturing to new productions like The Orville, which has become one of my favorite Sci-Fi series in recent years and with the right people helping keep his series on track. He really is creative and knows to channel it into his work in the right ways. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
So can fandoms and producers avoid Star Trek Syndrome? No, but there are signs that you can look out for. (Cut to clips of different series and movies as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
For starters, you need to be aware of those who have the problems. You could confront the person by telling them that they're ruining the experience for you and that you are a fan or find someone who can help you because if those who suffer from this Syndrome are making the experience unbearable then you need to find different ways to enjoy what you like without being a part of the problem. And remember what every MYST-ie says best "It's just a show or a movie, I should really just relax". (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And speaking of relaxing, The Fourth of July is around the corner and I will now be enjoying some Rocky and Creed movies because I can. I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's my opinion!