(Music in the same vein of Donald Duck's opening theme plays in the background James singing throughout the intro "Who has the Average disposition? One guy that's who. Who never puts in his two cents? Who knows that his world makes sense? Who always lives a normal life? Who always seems to never know what's right? Who tells it true in front of a lie? No one! But The Average Guy!" as "James Faraci The Last Of The Americans Presents:" is seen then cuts to a picture of James Faraci with a simple smile on James' face and the words "The Average Guy" is below and cuts to the title card of "The Modern Guide to Modern Dating" then cutting to animation with The Narrator played by Chris Lee Moore doing a voice over)
The Narrator (Voice over): Since the dawn of time immemorial man has wanted to mate with females. In the beginning it was easy for cavemen to look at a mate and clubbing was the only way to go, LITERALLY! But times have changed and since then women have gotten smarter and men have become... (The animated Female clubs the guy) Well suffice to say men have been getting the short end of the stick for centuries! (Animation fades as it cuts to live action where The Average Guy is sitting on his couch feeling sorry for himself eating a box of Quaker Oatmeal Squares cereal while downing a bottle of Ginger Ale while The Narrator continues to do a voice over.)
The Narrator (Voice over): Take for example this poor Average Guy! (The Average Guy Spit takes out his Ginger Ale and the Quaker Oatmeal Squares cereals fly)
The Average Guy: WHAT THE HELL?! Where are you and why are you talking to me?
The Narrator (Off screen): I am The Narrator and I'm going to help you get a date.
The Average Guy: Against my will I suppose.
The Narrator (Off screen): Well I want to show that a guy like you can get a girl like (Show a picture of Lea Michele as The Narrator says her before The Average Guy pushes the picture off screen to the right.)
The Average Guy: Yeah right in my dreams maybe. Attractive people attract Attractive people while Average Guys like me get restraining orders, tazered and hit with mace and pepper spray.
The Narrator (Off screen): Well you can try. Let's start off with the way you approach your attire.
The Average Guy: What's wrong with how I dress?
The Narrator (Off screen): Nothing if you want to portray yourself as a bum!
The Average Guy: HEY!
The Narrator (Off screen): No offense but I took a look inside your closet and HO Boy are you in trouble but let's see if we can get you ready for a night out of speed dating.
The Average Guy: Speed dating? Just throw me into the deep end of the pool infested with sharks why don't ya?
The Narrator (Off screen): Just let's see what you would wear. (Cut to The Average Guy inside the closet)
The Average Guy: HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!
The Narrator (Off screen): A Jump cut but enough of all that show me your finest suit. (The Average Guy dresses up into his finest suit.) Wow, you look too professional. Let's eighty six the tie. (Tie blinks off and The Average Guy jumps in surprise.)
The Average Guy: The tie held the suit together.
The Narrator (Off screen): We need you to look your best but not to look like your going to a job interview. (Cut to inside a hotel dining area that's hosting a Speed Dating event where The Average Guy is sitting at a table.) Now when being approached by someone on this event keep you eyes and your expectations open.
The Average Guy: Would you give me a moment's notice before you jump cut me into someplace I'm not ready for?!
The Narrator (Off screen): No! Now when speed dating there is an X amount of time to deal with a variable amount of women. (A female played by Marita Holm from ChiqueGeeks walks towards the table of The Average Guy.) It is important that you stand up and extend your hand to shake her hand and pull out the chair and introduce yourself with subtlety.
The female: My friends call me Mary.
The Average Guy: Well better having your friends call you Mary than...(Cut to The Average Guy slamming the door to his apartment as he comes back looking like Hell and looking up and around.) THANKS JACKASS! I really needed to get comments like "He'll never look like Leonardo DiCaprio not even with enough Plastic Surgery to make Michael Jackson look normal!" or "Not enough booze on the planet to even give him a chance!" And this one I love "DOUSE ME IN NAPALM!"
The Narrator (Off screen): Well let's see where you went wrong. (Rewinds footage to analyze what went wrong.)
The Narrator (Voice over): Let's start with the fact you started off with a VERY inappropriate joke. (Show clip of The Average guy making a bad joke.) That sent the vibe that you were thrown into a bad situation and everyone there made sure to treat you like you were less than how you wanted to be perceived.
The Average Guy (Voice over): Well excuse me for making a joke about myself besides you threw me into this situation.
The Narrator (Voice over): Well you should've asked what drink SHE would've liked instead of one you would've liked and paid.
The Average Guy (Voice over): I'm sorry Alcohol and I don't mix besides I paid for the drinks.
The Narrator (Voice over): Well that led to no one changing their vibes on you. Besides your eating manners weren't Emily Post!
The Average Guy (Voice over): Give me a break! (Cut to The Average Guy in his apartment.)
The Narrator (Off screen): No way besides we're going to try hitting the Bar scene.
The Average Guy: NO WAY! I'm going to stay right here and Stew over everything that went wrong...(Cut to The Average Guy taking a stool in the bar) And there is no way you can make me... (Looks around to see that he's at a bar.) OH SON OF A...
The Narrator (Off screen): The Bar scene should be at least for every one guy there should be at least four women so you're sure to at least have a 25 % of finding a date.
The Average Guy: But a 75% chance of failure.
The Narrator (Off screen): Well it doesn't hurt to try, so go to it. (The Average Guy puts his drink down and begins to speak before the scene cuts to The Average Guy slamming the door to his apartment as he comes back looking like Hell AGAIN and looking up and around.)
The Average Guy: I really hope your next place has good access to easy medical care because I learned my lesson if I have a 25% of finding a date, I have a 100% chance of getting my ass tazered, Maced & Pepper sprayed and threatened with either restraining orders or death! I'm going to check my e-mail and forget this whole thing ever happened. (The Average Guy takes off his now TWICE wrecked suit and gets back into his average clothes to check his e-mail)
The Narrator (Off screen): You can't give up!
The Average Guy: WATCH ME! Hmm, that's odd an E-Mail from a girl.
The Narrator (Off screen): Are you sure? You know the internet has a good policy on fake people.
The Average Guy: That's true but it's worth a shot.
The Narrator (Off screen): Well if you're going to try...(Singsong): and I think it's a mistake! (Normal): I suggest you set everything up.
The Average Guy: That's what I was going to do! In fact, I'm going to need some advice.
The Narrator (Off screen): Well, I'll call the cops while you make a homemade meal.
The Average Guy: You want me to bring my date here?
The Narrator (Off screen): Well (Cut to see a clean apartment) How about now?
The Average Guy: Nice. Okay let's get going. (Cut to a few hours later as there is a knock on the door.)
The Narrator (Off screen): Now when approaching the situation. You must remain calm and collected, remember she is in your territory, everything you do no matter how insignificant will ultimately reflect on...
The Average Guy: OKAY I GET IT! (The Average Guy opens the door to discover a good looking woman played by Rebecca Fonseca)
The Narrator (Off screen): HELLO! (The Narrator runs ON Screen)
The Narrator: Why should you stay here? I've got the ability to Jump cut us to Paris. What do you say? (The Good looking woman looks at her options and looks at The Narrator)
The Good Looking Woman: I say to you (Pointing to The Average Guy and The Average Guy points to himself with an inquisitive look on his face before cutting back to The Good Looking Woman) Au Revoir! And to you (Pointing The Narrator and The Narrator points to himself with an inquisitive look on his face before cutting back to The Good Looking Woman) You and me off to Gaye Paris, Allons-Y!
(The Narrator walks off screen and the two jump cut out. The Average Guy sighs and looks down and sighs and nods to himself as a woman says off-screen "Excuse me" before cutting to see the woman at the door played by Lea Michele at The Average Guy's apartment door.)
The Woman at the door: I overheard a lot of what was going on and I thought maybe if you had gone through so much maybe I could join you for your meal?
(The Average Guy look at himself as to say "Even I'm not that stupid to say no to a woman who is WILLING to at least talk to me.)
The Average Guy: Come on in.
The Narrator (Off Screen): Well sometimes it just comes down to plain old luck.
The Average Guy: SHUT UP! Next time I find you on screen, I'm kicking your ass!
The Woman at the door (Off screen): Who are you talking to?
The Average Guy: No one just myself.
The Woman at the door (Off screen): And you are?
The Average Guy: I'm The Average Guy and that's who I am.
Showing posts with label The Average Guy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Average Guy. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
Monday, December 15, 2014
The Average Guy in "Merry Christ-mess"
(Music in the same vein of Donald Duck's opening theme plays in the background James singing throughout the intro "Who has the Average disposition? One guy that's who. Who never puts in his two cents? Who knows that his world makes sense? Who always lives a normal life? Who always seems to never know what's right? Who tells it true in front of a lie? No one! But The Average Guy!" as "James Faraci The Last Of The Americans Presents:" is seen then cuts to a picture of James Faraci with a simple smile on James' face and the words "The Average Guy" is below and cuts to the title card of "Merry Christ-mess")
(Scene starts with "The Average Guy" driving in his car to the mall while "Holiday Cluster (Expletive deleted)" while "The Average Guy" whistles the song for a few seconds before stopping his car and the camera cuts to see an over packed parking lot.)
A.G.(Audio only): HO BOY! I'm going to be here a while! (Cut to The Average Guy inside his car going slowly in the parking lot and seeing a car in front of them and The Average Guy watches as the other car parks in the spot he had and finally discovers the spot next to the one he saw and tries to take when he saw the Handicapped sign and The Average Guy shouts an F-Bomb as he hits his car horn then scene cuts to The Average Guy FINALLY getting into the Mall only to see what could be described as the decline of human civilization and The Average Guy shakes his head in sadness and as he walks around The Average Guy bumps into someone heavily bruised played by Paulo Fonseca.)
A.G.: Dude, how long have you ever been in here.
Citizen: Since the middle of November.
A.G.: "The middle of November"? You missed Thanksgiving for what?
Citizen: This gift for my wife though I think she just texted me. Can you read it for me? (The Average Guy looks at the screen and hands it back to the other guy.)
A.G.: She's filing for divorce because you've been in this mall for weeks.
Citizen: SERIOUSLY?! I've got to get out of here! (The other guy runs for the door as The Average Guy rolls his eyes then the scene cuts to see The Average Guy's eyes as he sees his car just about to be towed away and he screams as he stops the tow truck driver played by Rebecca Fonseca from towing his ride.)
A. G.: Hey! I just got out of that madness and I was about to get out of here!
Tow Truck Driver: Tell you what, You pay me and I'll let you keep your ride.
A.G.: I'd love to but my hands are full.
Tow Truck Driver: You know something? Why don't I take your packages until you get your hands on your wallet to let me swipe your card through my mobile reader.
A.G.: Sounds fair. (The Average Guy hands all the packages to the Tow Truck Driver who shouts SUCKER! and drives off leaving his ride unharmed and The Average Guy frustrated before cutting to The Average Guy back at his apartment on his couch.)
A.G.: I may be an average guy but even I have limits and what I saw and went through was just an abomination of what the Holidays are about! What have we become? Are we so insane that we sacrifice so much and steal from our fellow man when it comes to a Holiday that's supposed to be about the birth of one man who was born in a stable surrounded by livestock and with nothing but his parents and it's supposed to be about being with family & friends one more time before the new year. I need to relax maybe something good on TV.
TV (Audio only): BUY NOW AND ENJOY THE SAVINGS FOR THE HAPPIEST OF HOLIDAYS. (The Average Guy flips the channel and sees "THE" clip of Linus quoting the Bible on the birth of Jesus and The Average Guy smiles and a Ding is heard as a Light bulb lights up over "The Average Guy"s head as scene cuts to the Mall as everyone is in near riot mode of shopping.)
A.G. (Audio only): ATTENTION MALL SHOPPERS! (Everyone stops scene cuts to The Average Guy on a P.A. microphone at a security guard's post.)
A.G.: I am The Average Guy! How many of you are tired of staying here for what feels like days on end not getting what you want at a store and miss spending time with your family? (Everyone shouting in a Yeah! noise) SO GO HOME ALREADY! (A citizen voiced by Chris Lee Moore shouts "But how can we get great deals and the presents for our families?") Good question if everyone can look at the banner in front of the Sears, I give you, the solution! (Cut to everyone looking out to the Sears)
A.G. (Audio only): BEHOLD! (Banner unfurls) The Internet! It's more than just used for people to complain about petty stuff! You can purchase the gifts for your loved ones and be with them for everything even Christmas Eve Church services! (A citizen played by Lewis Lovhaug looks around and agrees with The Average Guy and says "Let's go home!" and everyone save for the employees at the mall go home then camera cuts to "The Average Guy")
A.G.: Well, that actually worked! Not too bad. I'm The Average Guy & that's just who I am.
(Scene starts with "The Average Guy" driving in his car to the mall while "Holiday Cluster (Expletive deleted)" while "The Average Guy" whistles the song for a few seconds before stopping his car and the camera cuts to see an over packed parking lot.)
A.G.(Audio only): HO BOY! I'm going to be here a while! (Cut to The Average Guy inside his car going slowly in the parking lot and seeing a car in front of them and The Average Guy watches as the other car parks in the spot he had and finally discovers the spot next to the one he saw and tries to take when he saw the Handicapped sign and The Average Guy shouts an F-Bomb as he hits his car horn then scene cuts to The Average Guy FINALLY getting into the Mall only to see what could be described as the decline of human civilization and The Average Guy shakes his head in sadness and as he walks around The Average Guy bumps into someone heavily bruised played by Paulo Fonseca.)
A.G.: Dude, how long have you ever been in here.
Citizen: Since the middle of November.
A.G.: "The middle of November"? You missed Thanksgiving for what?
Citizen: This gift for my wife though I think she just texted me. Can you read it for me? (The Average Guy looks at the screen and hands it back to the other guy.)
A.G.: She's filing for divorce because you've been in this mall for weeks.
Citizen: SERIOUSLY?! I've got to get out of here! (The other guy runs for the door as The Average Guy rolls his eyes then the scene cuts to see The Average Guy's eyes as he sees his car just about to be towed away and he screams as he stops the tow truck driver played by Rebecca Fonseca from towing his ride.)
A. G.: Hey! I just got out of that madness and I was about to get out of here!
Tow Truck Driver: Tell you what, You pay me and I'll let you keep your ride.
A.G.: I'd love to but my hands are full.
Tow Truck Driver: You know something? Why don't I take your packages until you get your hands on your wallet to let me swipe your card through my mobile reader.
A.G.: Sounds fair. (The Average Guy hands all the packages to the Tow Truck Driver who shouts SUCKER! and drives off leaving his ride unharmed and The Average Guy frustrated before cutting to The Average Guy back at his apartment on his couch.)
A.G.: I may be an average guy but even I have limits and what I saw and went through was just an abomination of what the Holidays are about! What have we become? Are we so insane that we sacrifice so much and steal from our fellow man when it comes to a Holiday that's supposed to be about the birth of one man who was born in a stable surrounded by livestock and with nothing but his parents and it's supposed to be about being with family & friends one more time before the new year. I need to relax maybe something good on TV.
TV (Audio only): BUY NOW AND ENJOY THE SAVINGS FOR THE HAPPIEST OF HOLIDAYS. (The Average Guy flips the channel and sees "THE" clip of Linus quoting the Bible on the birth of Jesus and The Average Guy smiles and a Ding is heard as a Light bulb lights up over "The Average Guy"s head as scene cuts to the Mall as everyone is in near riot mode of shopping.)
A.G. (Audio only): ATTENTION MALL SHOPPERS! (Everyone stops scene cuts to The Average Guy on a P.A. microphone at a security guard's post.)
A.G.: I am The Average Guy! How many of you are tired of staying here for what feels like days on end not getting what you want at a store and miss spending time with your family? (Everyone shouting in a Yeah! noise) SO GO HOME ALREADY! (A citizen voiced by Chris Lee Moore shouts "But how can we get great deals and the presents for our families?") Good question if everyone can look at the banner in front of the Sears, I give you, the solution! (Cut to everyone looking out to the Sears)
A.G. (Audio only): BEHOLD! (Banner unfurls) The Internet! It's more than just used for people to complain about petty stuff! You can purchase the gifts for your loved ones and be with them for everything even Christmas Eve Church services! (A citizen played by Lewis Lovhaug looks around and agrees with The Average Guy and says "Let's go home!" and everyone save for the employees at the mall go home then camera cuts to "The Average Guy")
A.G.: Well, that actually worked! Not too bad. I'm The Average Guy & that's just who I am.
Tuesday, October 28, 2014
The Average Guy in "Elect Me!"
(Music in the same vein of Donald Duck's opening theme plays in the background James singing throughout the intro "Who has the Average disposition one guess that guy. Who never puts in his two cents? Who knows that his world makes sense? Who always lives a normal life? Who always seems to never know what's right? Who tells it true in front of a lie? No one! But The Average Guy!" as "James Faraci The Last Of The Americans Presents:" is seen then cuts to a picture of James Faraci with a simple smile on James' face and the words "The Average Guy" is below and cuts to the title card of "Elect Me!")
(Scene starts with The Average Guy played by James Faraci heading to a couch with a bowl of Quaker oatmeal squares to watch some television. James sighs then turns on the television)
Television (Audio only): The Democrats have single handedly decimated everything good that has happened with our country.(Cut to see the TV screen with the Republican logo on it.) However if we put Republicans in control of the Senate and the House Of Representatives we can rebuild our country. Paid for by the people who wish to see Barack Obama be sent back to the Congo. (Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Sounds good, might vote Republican this ye..
Television (Audio only): IT'S A LIE! REPUBLICANS ARE NAZIS!
A.G.: What? (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: DEMOCRATS HAVE BROUGHT NOTHING BUT PEACE, PROSPERITY AND BETTER HEALTHCARE TO OUR COUNTRY! THEY HAVE ALSO IMPLIMENTED STRONGER MEASURES TO STOP THOSE WHO DOMESTICALLY ABUSE & RAPE PEOPLE BY EXECUTING THOSE RATFACED BASTARDS WHO WOULD DO SUCH CRIMES! Would you let a rapist near your kids? Paid for by the People who wish to see Republicans be EX-TERM-IN-ATED!(Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Hmm, Dalek democrats who want to get rid of criminals not ba..
Television (Audio only): REPUBLICANS HAVE HARSHER MEASURES TOWARDS CRIMINALS!
A.G.: Not another one (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: THE REPUBLICANS WILL GUT CRIMINALS WHO BREAK ALL LAWS WITH A RUSTY SPOON. WE WILL ALSO REMOVE THE COMMUNIST THREAT OF THE DEMOCRATS WHO WERE FOUNDED BY THE KU KLUX KLAN! So tell me would you side with communists who side the Ku Klux Klan? Paid for by the Republicans who wish to suppress the Democrats.(Cut to the Average Guy)
A.G.: Hmm, Democrats who are communists that side with the Ku Klux Klan or Republicans who may or may not be Nazis. Maybe I should vote for a third party Independent candidate.
Television (Audio only): Third party Independent candidates have no say whatsoever!
A.G.: For the fricking love of Peat Moss, not again! (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: Third party Independent candidates have yet to make a mark. Yes Jesse "The Body" Ventura was the Governor of Minnesota but no President, Senator or Representative has made a difference at all so what will you do? Waste a vote? Paid for by the Republicans and Democrats to make sure you vote for at least one of our sides.(Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Let me watch something, ANYTHING besides an advertisement about the election! (the Average Guy changes the channel which cuts to a "Daily Show With Jon Stewart" like show with it's host looking like Paulo Fonseca and trying to hide subliminal messages in his stories.)
Host: We're back! Republicans are Nazi scum. In the latest reports according to our sources CNN is the only channel for real news outside of us and watch all who praise Premier Obama, Fox News watchers are Nazis. the Ebola virus have come to our country It'll kill all Republicans for the glory of Putin and... (Cut to The Average Guy slowly getting angry changing the channel)
Television (Audio only): Republicans are what this country needs.
A.G.: Not this propaganda again! (Cut to the TV Screen.)
Television: Republicans are not Nazis we welcome all creeds, colors and sexual preferences. We can destroy the problems that ill this country. Paid for by the Republican party. (Cut to The Average Guy slowly counting down on one hand)
Television (Audio only): VOTE FOR THE DEMOCRATS!
A.G.: Right on cue. (Cut to the TV Screen.)
Television: Republicans will repress all the social changes to every creed, color and sexual preferences and use innocent people they claim are terrorists as target practice when in fact they support Terrorism. NO! Democrats support Terrorism. (Cut to The Average Guy getting angrier and angrier as the Audio continues to be propaganda slamming both the Republicans and Democrats until The Average Guy gets so mad he throws the remote down, stands up and walks away as the chatter continues and The Average Guy comes back with a Rocket Launcher and fires it at the television)
Television: HOLY! (Television is demolished in one second then cuts to The Average Guy sighing then looking at the audience.
A.G.: Folks, I'm an average guy. I won't tell you to vote for one party or another. If you like the Republican Party vote for them. If you vote for a Democrat, I won't hold it against you. I'm The Average Guy and that's just who I am. (Voice of Chris Lee Moore in the background says "Paid for the people who just hope you vote" then The Average Guy grabs a gun and shoots off screen to the right as a yelp in pain is heard then a thud and The Average Guy walks off screen to the left with a smile on his face.)
(Scene starts with The Average Guy played by James Faraci heading to a couch with a bowl of Quaker oatmeal squares to watch some television. James sighs then turns on the television)
Television (Audio only): The Democrats have single handedly decimated everything good that has happened with our country.(Cut to see the TV screen with the Republican logo on it.) However if we put Republicans in control of the Senate and the House Of Representatives we can rebuild our country. Paid for by the people who wish to see Barack Obama be sent back to the Congo. (Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Sounds good, might vote Republican this ye..
Television (Audio only): IT'S A LIE! REPUBLICANS ARE NAZIS!
A.G.: What? (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: DEMOCRATS HAVE BROUGHT NOTHING BUT PEACE, PROSPERITY AND BETTER HEALTHCARE TO OUR COUNTRY! THEY HAVE ALSO IMPLIMENTED STRONGER MEASURES TO STOP THOSE WHO DOMESTICALLY ABUSE & RAPE PEOPLE BY EXECUTING THOSE RATFACED BASTARDS WHO WOULD DO SUCH CRIMES! Would you let a rapist near your kids? Paid for by the People who wish to see Republicans be EX-TERM-IN-ATED!(Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Hmm, Dalek democrats who want to get rid of criminals not ba..
Television (Audio only): REPUBLICANS HAVE HARSHER MEASURES TOWARDS CRIMINALS!
A.G.: Not another one (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: THE REPUBLICANS WILL GUT CRIMINALS WHO BREAK ALL LAWS WITH A RUSTY SPOON. WE WILL ALSO REMOVE THE COMMUNIST THREAT OF THE DEMOCRATS WHO WERE FOUNDED BY THE KU KLUX KLAN! So tell me would you side with communists who side the Ku Klux Klan? Paid for by the Republicans who wish to suppress the Democrats.(Cut to the Average Guy)
A.G.: Hmm, Democrats who are communists that side with the Ku Klux Klan or Republicans who may or may not be Nazis. Maybe I should vote for a third party Independent candidate.
Television (Audio only): Third party Independent candidates have no say whatsoever!
A.G.: For the fricking love of Peat Moss, not again! (Cut to TV Screen)
Television: Third party Independent candidates have yet to make a mark. Yes Jesse "The Body" Ventura was the Governor of Minnesota but no President, Senator or Representative has made a difference at all so what will you do? Waste a vote? Paid for by the Republicans and Democrats to make sure you vote for at least one of our sides.(Cut to The Average Guy)
A.G.: Let me watch something, ANYTHING besides an advertisement about the election! (the Average Guy changes the channel which cuts to a "Daily Show With Jon Stewart" like show with it's host looking like Paulo Fonseca and trying to hide subliminal messages in his stories.)
Host: We're back! Republicans are Nazi scum. In the latest reports according to our sources CNN is the only channel for real news outside of us and watch all who praise Premier Obama, Fox News watchers are Nazis. the Ebola virus have come to our country It'll kill all Republicans for the glory of Putin and... (Cut to The Average Guy slowly getting angry changing the channel)
Television (Audio only): Republicans are what this country needs.
A.G.: Not this propaganda again! (Cut to the TV Screen.)
Television: Republicans are not Nazis we welcome all creeds, colors and sexual preferences. We can destroy the problems that ill this country. Paid for by the Republican party. (Cut to The Average Guy slowly counting down on one hand)
Television (Audio only): VOTE FOR THE DEMOCRATS!
A.G.: Right on cue. (Cut to the TV Screen.)
Television: Republicans will repress all the social changes to every creed, color and sexual preferences and use innocent people they claim are terrorists as target practice when in fact they support Terrorism. NO! Democrats support Terrorism. (Cut to The Average Guy getting angrier and angrier as the Audio continues to be propaganda slamming both the Republicans and Democrats until The Average Guy gets so mad he throws the remote down, stands up and walks away as the chatter continues and The Average Guy comes back with a Rocket Launcher and fires it at the television)
Television: HOLY! (Television is demolished in one second then cuts to The Average Guy sighing then looking at the audience.
A.G.: Folks, I'm an average guy. I won't tell you to vote for one party or another. If you like the Republican Party vote for them. If you vote for a Democrat, I won't hold it against you. I'm The Average Guy and that's just who I am. (Voice of Chris Lee Moore in the background says "Paid for the people who just hope you vote" then The Average Guy grabs a gun and shoots off screen to the right as a yelp in pain is heard then a thud and The Average Guy walks off screen to the left with a smile on his face.)
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