(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then cutting to The Last Of The Americans)
TLOTA:
I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views that I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. Last year, the gang on-board the Satellite Of Love and Moonbase 13 hit us with a Gauntlet of Bad Movies! After the first time, I felt like Rocky Balboa at the end of Rocky, Rocky II, III, IV and Rocky Balboa! (Cut to clips of MST3K: The Gauntlet as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
And for my money after going through it several times, I can honestly say, it strangely becomes more fun to go through it again and again. I think after the 1,000 trip I can honestly be said I went completely nuts until I stopped doing "The Gauntlet" and can now say with utmost clarity, it was an awesome, awesome homage to the past and a great doorway to the future of the franchise.(Cut to notice that Netflix is ending MST3K and James shouts "GODDAMNIT!" Cut to James physically)
TLOTA:
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 2
2) The 1995 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
(Cut to the MST3K Turkey Day 1995 Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This one was the final one in the Comedy Central era and I was glad to see it because it introduced Pearl played by Mary Jo Pehl and it has the last one with Dr. Clayton Forrester before his own character's demise at the end of the Comedy Central era. Plus the episode that premieres in the end of the marathon introduced Pearl got an different introduction and set of Sketches when it went into regular rotation also the marathon had several classics and moments when Dr. Forrester had to deal with Jack Perkins, Mr. B Natural, Scratch and Kevin Murphy dressed as a Kitten With A Whip (Which I didn't truly realize until now that it was a bit of word and character play on the title of a movie that was featured on MST3K) While it was clear that Dr. Forrester was drowning in everything on his own since TV's Frank left, he eventually went with the flow of the party until Pearl comes in and after that poor Clayton couldn't catch a break, maybe it was for the best that he was written out by the end of the Comedy Central era but I'll say that he got a solid farewell and a Turkey Day Marathon that was worthy of Clayton! Godspeed and may a flight of many of your fellow mad scientists sing thee to thy rest!
And for my money after going through it several times, I can honestly say, it strangely becomes more fun to go through it again and again. I think after the 1,000 trip I can honestly be said I went completely nuts until I stopped doing "The Gauntlet" and can now say with utmost clarity, it was an awesome, awesome homage to the past and a great doorway to the future of the franchise.(Cut to notice that Netflix is ending MST3K and James shouts "GODDAMNIT!" Cut to James physically)
TLOTA:
And after hearing that, what I'm about to do makes what I'm about to talk about all the more meaningful and when I watch this year's MST3K Turkey Day Marathon that we celebrate this tradition! What's MST3K Turkey Day? Glad you asked! (Cut to clips of the first "MST3K Turkey Day" Storyline as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
In 1991, with Mystery Science Theater 3000 gaining in Popularity with the newly minted Comedy Central. The network came up with the idea to run a marathon of the show which included their bad movies or "Turkeys" as they're more commonly known on Thanksgiving day and it proved to be a success. The Tradition survived throughout the Comedy Central Era and when it went to what is now SYFY they did it once and then never again. It was thankfully revived in it's current iteration and I am so glad because it allows those who haven't seen the series to dive head first into the franchise and get first hand knowledge of the show. (Cut to James Physically)
In 1991, with Mystery Science Theater 3000 gaining in Popularity with the newly minted Comedy Central. The network came up with the idea to run a marathon of the show which included their bad movies or "Turkeys" as they're more commonly known on Thanksgiving day and it proved to be a success. The Tradition survived throughout the Comedy Central Era and when it went to what is now SYFY they did it once and then never again. It was thankfully revived in it's current iteration and I am so glad because it allows those who haven't seen the series to dive head first into the franchise and get first hand knowledge of the show. (Cut to James Physically)
TLOTA:
And today, I'm counting down ten of my favorite moments of The MST3K Turkey Day Marathon. While Spoilers aren't necessary for me to give out, it's a Countdown on a series of Marathons. So get yourself a slice of Turkey with all the trimmings and a copy of the MST3K episode of "Attack Of The Eye Creatures". These are the Top 10 MST3K Turkey Day Marathons (Cut to a field as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground and a camera looks around and James Pops up in Camo and starts shooting and The camera drops. Cut to the inside of an oven where what the camera symbolizes and James looking in before closing the door and the words "Top 10 Mystery Science Theater 3000 Turkey Day Marathons" are shown and James closes the door revealing the Number.)
And today, I'm counting down ten of my favorite moments of The MST3K Turkey Day Marathon. While Spoilers aren't necessary for me to give out, it's a Countdown on a series of Marathons. So get yourself a slice of Turkey with all the trimmings and a copy of the MST3K episode of "Attack Of The Eye Creatures". These are the Top 10 MST3K Turkey Day Marathons (Cut to a field as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground and a camera looks around and James Pops up in Camo and starts shooting and The camera drops. Cut to the inside of an oven where what the camera symbolizes and James looking in before closing the door and the words "Top 10 Mystery Science Theater 3000 Turkey Day Marathons" are shown and James closes the door revealing the Number.)
(Cut to the MST3K Turkey Day 1993 Marathon as James does a voiceover)
10) The 1993 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Yeah Somehow after the 1992 Turkey Day Marathon the MST3K crew were grounded from Hosting duties and because of that Comedy Central hosted a contest where housewife and MSTie won the contest to Host the 1993 Turkey Day Marathon. However Watching the marathon as she had to host a MST3K Turkey Day watch party, cook a Thanksgiving Dinner and host a marathon which would be intercut with other people talking about the show while trying to be funny as they help with the hosting was a drag to get through. The movie choices were good but again sitting and watching these host segments was where the Marathon started to suffer. But fortunately things would improve greatly in the years to come.
Yeah Somehow after the 1992 Turkey Day Marathon the MST3K crew were grounded from Hosting duties and because of that Comedy Central hosted a contest where housewife and MSTie won the contest to Host the 1993 Turkey Day Marathon. However Watching the marathon as she had to host a MST3K Turkey Day watch party, cook a Thanksgiving Dinner and host a marathon which would be intercut with other people talking about the show while trying to be funny as they help with the hosting was a drag to get through. The movie choices were good but again sitting and watching these host segments was where the Marathon started to suffer. But fortunately things would improve greatly in the years to come.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Olivia looking in and using a Bulb Baster and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 9
(Cut to MST3K Turkey Day 2013 as James does a voiceover)
9) The MST3K Turkey Day 2013 Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
The First one since Joel regained the rights to MST3K and worked with Shout Factory to bring the show back, this one has Joel celebrating the 25th Anniversary and Joel took the reigns and instead of having there being a story. He was calming and entertaining as he had the audience playing silly games to add to the fun as he introduces the movies. Granted According to sources I had access to originally Shout Factory meant for this to be a one off event but apparently was so successful Shout Factory was given no other choice but to bring it back and has rightfully returned the MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as the Thanksgiving Tradition it deserves to be.
Number 9
(Cut to MST3K Turkey Day 2013 as James does a voiceover)
9) The MST3K Turkey Day 2013 Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
The First one since Joel regained the rights to MST3K and worked with Shout Factory to bring the show back, this one has Joel celebrating the 25th Anniversary and Joel took the reigns and instead of having there being a story. He was calming and entertaining as he had the audience playing silly games to add to the fun as he introduces the movies. Granted According to sources I had access to originally Shout Factory meant for this to be a one off event but apparently was so successful Shout Factory was given no other choice but to bring it back and has rightfully returned the MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as the Thanksgiving Tradition it deserves to be.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Renee putting in a Dressing dish in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 8
Number 8
(Cut to MST3K Turkey Day 1992 as James does a voiceover)
8) The 1992 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This one had a little more opening up on the mythos of Deep 13 but it also got some flack as apparently there were people who didn't get the joke. Dr. Clayton Forester played by Trace Beaulieu is for all intent and purpose a Mad Scientist who wants to torture and torment people with the WORST movie ever made and not just one viewing of it, I'm talking forcing the entire world to a never ending cycle of the same movie as after watching it the intelligence of the world is heavily lower than it is now if that can be possible and he can conquer the earth by any means. And oh yeah, What is the pivotal line in the opening credits of the show again? Oh yeah, "IT'S JUST A SHOW, I SHOULD REALLY JUST RELAX!" Why did it get such heat? Because apparently some easily offended Jack-Ass seeing TV's Frank played by Frank Conniff being stuffed with Turkey after Turkey wrote about a redwood's worth of letters crying about what was happening to TV's Frank. I'm just glad Twitter wasn't around #CancelMST3K would be trending like nobody's business. While Comedy Central relented and not asked Best Brains for their assistance in the Turkey Day Marathon over the next couple of years I can say the Marathon suffered the first go around. The second and last year without the Best Brains bunch were better but not by much. Wanna know how? Join me in the number seven spot.
8) The 1992 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This one had a little more opening up on the mythos of Deep 13 but it also got some flack as apparently there were people who didn't get the joke. Dr. Clayton Forester played by Trace Beaulieu is for all intent and purpose a Mad Scientist who wants to torture and torment people with the WORST movie ever made and not just one viewing of it, I'm talking forcing the entire world to a never ending cycle of the same movie as after watching it the intelligence of the world is heavily lower than it is now if that can be possible and he can conquer the earth by any means. And oh yeah, What is the pivotal line in the opening credits of the show again? Oh yeah, "IT'S JUST A SHOW, I SHOULD REALLY JUST RELAX!" Why did it get such heat? Because apparently some easily offended Jack-Ass seeing TV's Frank played by Frank Conniff being stuffed with Turkey after Turkey wrote about a redwood's worth of letters crying about what was happening to TV's Frank. I'm just glad Twitter wasn't around #CancelMST3K would be trending like nobody's business. While Comedy Central relented and not asked Best Brains for their assistance in the Turkey Day Marathon over the next couple of years I can say the Marathon suffered the first go around. The second and last year without the Best Brains bunch were better but not by much. Wanna know how? Join me in the number seven spot.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Paulo and Brenda Fonseca putting in their homemade Croissant Rolls in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 7
(Cut to the 1994 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
7) The 1994 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
I truly believe that the late great Adam West was having fun hosting this one and the humor was very much in the late great Adam West's usual style of humor and he was humorous and the guests he brought on were good, it was the movie that premiered that I'm sure Adam enjoyed getting the piss knocked out of it. The movie is question is "Zombie Nightmare" which is a personal favorite episode of mine. The start of the marathon when Adam Sighs when he discovers the marathon is 28 hours long as if to say to himself "Dear Lord what have I gotten myself into! Fourteen movies all in a row, Oh god I need a better agent...AGAIN!" I can say that he was enjoying himself and it showed. It was better than the 1993 MST3K and that speaks volumes! God Bless you Adam West, You were truly the King of Fromage, but nothing will beat a personal best.
Number 7
(Cut to the 1994 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
7) The 1994 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
I truly believe that the late great Adam West was having fun hosting this one and the humor was very much in the late great Adam West's usual style of humor and he was humorous and the guests he brought on were good, it was the movie that premiered that I'm sure Adam enjoyed getting the piss knocked out of it. The movie is question is "Zombie Nightmare" which is a personal favorite episode of mine. The start of the marathon when Adam Sighs when he discovers the marathon is 28 hours long as if to say to himself "Dear Lord what have I gotten myself into! Fourteen movies all in a row, Oh god I need a better agent...AGAIN!" I can say that he was enjoying himself and it showed. It was better than the 1993 MST3K and that speaks volumes! God Bless you Adam West, You were truly the King of Fromage, but nothing will beat a personal best.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Nick Yaun puts in a Green Bean Casserole in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 6
(Cut to MST3K 2018 Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
6) The MST3K 2018 Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This is the fifth MST3K Turkey Day Marathon since Shout Factory and Joel gained the rights to MST3K. And it just so happened to be celebrating the 30th Anniversary of MST3K. Joel Hodgson and Jonah Ray hosted it and they were pretty awesome. Though technically the marathon was a few days before Thanksgiving due to the latest season dubbed "The Gauntlet" opening on Thanksgiving! And it was historically significant because it was the first one I watched with my youngest niece because my family was celebrating the Turkey Day early and quickly noticed how Tom Servo was a Gumball Machine! She and I got a good laugh when there was a hoedown that Crow was hosting in the middle of the episode in the marathon. Because of the laughter, I missed the title of the episode. If anyone knows the name of the episode, let me know in the comments section.
Number 6
(Cut to MST3K 2018 Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
6) The MST3K 2018 Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This is the fifth MST3K Turkey Day Marathon since Shout Factory and Joel gained the rights to MST3K. And it just so happened to be celebrating the 30th Anniversary of MST3K. Joel Hodgson and Jonah Ray hosted it and they were pretty awesome. Though technically the marathon was a few days before Thanksgiving due to the latest season dubbed "The Gauntlet" opening on Thanksgiving! And it was historically significant because it was the first one I watched with my youngest niece because my family was celebrating the Turkey Day early and quickly noticed how Tom Servo was a Gumball Machine! She and I got a good laugh when there was a hoedown that Crow was hosting in the middle of the episode in the marathon. Because of the laughter, I missed the title of the episode. If anyone knows the name of the episode, let me know in the comments section.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Rebecca Yaun moving the Stuffing over and placing a Sweet Potato Pie in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 5
5) The 2014 and 2015 MST3K Turkey Day Marathons
TLOTA (Voiceover):
These two are important in terms of the future of MST3K because at the time, Joel Hodgson was going to use Kickstarter to help bring the series back and needed a platform to give him the notability to make the goal for a full season. What he needed was a couple of Turkey Day Marathons and that was what he got and thankfully they got people necessary to help make the Kickstarter the success it was in order to bring the show back! And what makes these Turkey Day Marathons list worthy is the fact he did have the fans in mind when he wanted to promote the Kickstarter and come up with the Turkey Day Marathon for us as well. A good double dose of Turkey Day fun which brought us something better
Number 5
(Cut to the 2014 and 2015 MST3K Turkey Day Marathons as James does a voiceover)
5) The 2014 and 2015 MST3K Turkey Day Marathons
TLOTA (Voiceover):
These two are important in terms of the future of MST3K because at the time, Joel Hodgson was going to use Kickstarter to help bring the series back and needed a platform to give him the notability to make the goal for a full season. What he needed was a couple of Turkey Day Marathons and that was what he got and thankfully they got people necessary to help make the Kickstarter the success it was in order to bring the show back! And what makes these Turkey Day Marathons list worthy is the fact he did have the fans in mind when he wanted to promote the Kickstarter and come up with the Turkey Day Marathon for us as well. A good double dose of Turkey Day fun which brought us something better
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and John Ross Santos moving the Croissant Rolls and placing in a tray of 100 Pigs In A Blanket in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 4
(Cut to clips of the 2017 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover)
4) The 2017 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
What was great about this one was the fact that Jonah and Felicia Day was co hosting and celebrating their first successful season on MST3K with a great abundance of their classic episodes and tales behind the scenes of the first season of the revival. But the best moment was at the end when we got news that we had been waiting for! We were getting a second season in the revival of MST3K! This was the moment where we as long time fans all breathed a contented sigh of relief! Of course the next season was "The Gauntlet" but trust me it was worth every last second of all the movies they showed to get the news everyone was dying for. It was a Turkey Day Marathon worth it's weight in Cheese and Cranberry Sauce. As of this moment the video of it on YouTube is not around hence why with this and the one at the Number 3 spot I can't get video for, which is why I suggest you go to TUBItv.com for the video for it.
Number 4
(Cut to clips of the 2017 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover)
4) The 2017 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
What was great about this one was the fact that Jonah and Felicia Day was co hosting and celebrating their first successful season on MST3K with a great abundance of their classic episodes and tales behind the scenes of the first season of the revival. But the best moment was at the end when we got news that we had been waiting for! We were getting a second season in the revival of MST3K! This was the moment where we as long time fans all breathed a contented sigh of relief! Of course the next season was "The Gauntlet" but trust me it was worth every last second of all the movies they showed to get the news everyone was dying for. It was a Turkey Day Marathon worth it's weight in Cheese and Cranberry Sauce. As of this moment the video of it on YouTube is not around hence why with this and the one at the Number 3 spot I can't get video for, which is why I suggest you go to TUBItv.com for the video for it.
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Mike Santos as He places corn in the oven and closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 3
(Cut to clips of the 2016 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James Does a Voiceover)
3)The 2016 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This was the first one I saw in a long, long time because I had forgotten it. But thankfully friends like Gus Webb AKA The Nostalgia Kid reminded me of how great the tradition of this special truly is and why I loved MST3K in the first place. But what put this one so high up was the fact I could share this one with my twin nieces as we met Jonah Ray for the first time in full on hosting duties before he got on board the satellite of love and from the moment he knew what was happening he had me hooked and waiting with baited breath for his actions and Jonah did not disappoint! With the movies they had he was able to show how much he loved the series and how he loved the fans of the series and it was evident that he wanted to keep the series relevant and made it clear for new fans what MST3K is all about!
Number 3
(Cut to clips of the 2016 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon as James Does a Voiceover)
3)The 2016 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This was the first one I saw in a long, long time because I had forgotten it. But thankfully friends like Gus Webb AKA The Nostalgia Kid reminded me of how great the tradition of this special truly is and why I loved MST3K in the first place. But what put this one so high up was the fact I could share this one with my twin nieces as we met Jonah Ray for the first time in full on hosting duties before he got on board the satellite of love and from the moment he knew what was happening he had me hooked and waiting with baited breath for his actions and Jonah did not disappoint! With the movies they had he was able to show how much he loved the series and how he loved the fans of the series and it was evident that he wanted to keep the series relevant and made it clear for new fans what MST3K is all about!
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Ed Champion and Andrew Beach placing a Pumpkin and Apple Pie in the oven before closing the door revealing the Number.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Number 2
2) The 1995 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
(Cut to the MST3K Turkey Day 1995 Marathon as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
This one was the final one in the Comedy Central era and I was glad to see it because it introduced Pearl played by Mary Jo Pehl and it has the last one with Dr. Clayton Forrester before his own character's demise at the end of the Comedy Central era. Plus the episode that premieres in the end of the marathon introduced Pearl got an different introduction and set of Sketches when it went into regular rotation also the marathon had several classics and moments when Dr. Forrester had to deal with Jack Perkins, Mr. B Natural, Scratch and Kevin Murphy dressed as a Kitten With A Whip (Which I didn't truly realize until now that it was a bit of word and character play on the title of a movie that was featured on MST3K) While it was clear that Dr. Forrester was drowning in everything on his own since TV's Frank left, he eventually went with the flow of the party until Pearl comes in and after that poor Clayton couldn't catch a break, maybe it was for the best that he was written out by the end of the Comedy Central era but I'll say that he got a solid farewell and a Turkey Day Marathon that was worthy of Clayton! Godspeed and may a flight of many of your fellow mad scientists sing thee to thy rest!
(Cut to the inside of an oven as "Turkey In The Straw" plays in the foreground where what the camera symbolizes and Eric Kurtzke placing in Baked Potatoes in the oven and closing the door. However the weight of what's in the oven to fall causing a crater in the Kitchen as it cuts to James looking down in the crater and shouting "GUYS!" and walking away where the oven was revealing the Number)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
And the Number One MST3K Turkey Day Marathon Moment is...
(Cut to the MST3K 1991 Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover)
1)The 1991 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Yeah it should come to no one's surprise why this one is the best, because lets face it, It not only set the template for The MST3K Turkey Day Marathon, it set the precedent for the event for time immemorial. Dr. Forrester is planning his biggest plan on Thanksgiving Day and Frank is setting up for Thanksgiving dinner with friends like Jack Perkins, The Mole People and Plant Guy and of course Dr. Forrester fighting it to see his plans of ruling the world come to fruition. It was funny enough that even if you weren't a fan you could be able to enjoy it and become a fan, it had enough of the story that fans could enjoy it as we see that even during the holidays nothing will ever stop Clayton Forrester from trying to take over the world with Mystery Science Theater 3000. But this is what I expect from my MST3K especially on the day it started, Thanksgiving Day. (Cut to James Physically)
TLOTA:
And that's my Ten Favorite MST3K Turkey Day moments, next month is December which means... (Audio of the MST3K Turkey Day Hymn is heard) It can wait The Turkey Day Marathon calls! I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's my opinion! WAHOO!
And the Number One MST3K Turkey Day Marathon Moment is...
(Cut to the MST3K 1991 Turkey Day Marathon as James does a voiceover)
1)The 1991 MST3K Turkey Day Marathon
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Yeah it should come to no one's surprise why this one is the best, because lets face it, It not only set the template for The MST3K Turkey Day Marathon, it set the precedent for the event for time immemorial. Dr. Forrester is planning his biggest plan on Thanksgiving Day and Frank is setting up for Thanksgiving dinner with friends like Jack Perkins, The Mole People and Plant Guy and of course Dr. Forrester fighting it to see his plans of ruling the world come to fruition. It was funny enough that even if you weren't a fan you could be able to enjoy it and become a fan, it had enough of the story that fans could enjoy it as we see that even during the holidays nothing will ever stop Clayton Forrester from trying to take over the world with Mystery Science Theater 3000. But this is what I expect from my MST3K especially on the day it started, Thanksgiving Day. (Cut to James Physically)
TLOTA:
And that's my Ten Favorite MST3K Turkey Day moments, next month is December which means... (Audio of the MST3K Turkey Day Hymn is heard) It can wait The Turkey Day Marathon calls! I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's my opinion! WAHOO!
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