TLOTA: I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and The Views that I’m about to express are that of my own and some of yours. It is time once again to bend the rules as I talk about yet ANOTHER movie in theaters as we speak! (Cut to the “Wonder Woman” 2017 logo and a sound alike to the 1970’s Wonder Woman TV series plays in the background before cutting to recreated clips of the movie as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): While “Superman: Man Of Steel”, “Superman v Batman: Dawn Of Justice” were two strikes towards the DCEU and “Suicide Squad” more like a foul ball. This movie makes up for all of that, in one fell stroke. This movie revived my hope that the DCEU can succeed! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: So, let’s get into “Wonder Woman” and see why that is. (Cut to recreated clips of the movie as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): The movie begins in Themyscira as we see Diana, Princess of Themyscira once again played by Gal Gadot growing up and being trained by her Aunt Antiope played by Robin Wright against the wishes of Diana’s mother Queen Hippolyta played by Connie Nielson. But one day A plane carrying Steve Trevor played by Chris Pine crashes onto the shores of Themyscira and unfortunately brings in the soldiers of the Kaiser to the shores of Themyscira. (A battle ensues between the soldiers, The Amazons with Steve Trevor fighting for The Amazons as Lightning strikes the Island as The Blockbuster Buster lands and all hell breaks loose as he goes after everything from the Amazons, Diana, Steve, and the soldiers of the Kaiser before cutting to James in his office.)
TLOTA: WHAT IN THE NAME OF ZEUS’ BUTTHOLE ARE YOU DOING HERE E-ROD?! I THOUGHT YOU WERE DONE WITH THE DCEU ONCE AND FOR ALL! (Cut to the recreated clips of the movie with The Blockbuster Buster in there)
Queen Hippolyta (Played by Olivia Horvath): NEVER SAY THE NAME OF ZEUS IN VAIN AND AS FOR YOU ANSWER HIM, WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU HERE?
The Blockbuster Buster: A Fair question my Queen allow me to introduce myself. Greetings Fanboys and Fangirls I’m E-Rod and I’m The Blockbuster Buster and I am about to do what Warner Brothers and DC Comics won’t do because they love money more than the fans, scrap this entire universe and reboot it the right way. No Superman snapping Zod’s Neck, no whiny douches crying “MARTHA!”, no Suicide Squad, not even this movie will happen! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: Look E-Rod I understand WHY you are done with the DCEU but to go so far as take down the best movie of the year which was directed by the same director as “Monster” all because it’s in a movie universe you don’t want to succeed and blacklisted, Isn’t this a little too much? Even for you? (Cut to the recreated clips of the movie with The Blockbuster Buster in there)
The Blockbuster Buster: You may have a point but right now, as much as DC means to me and as much as it pains me to do this, the rage of the fans being unleashed on bad movies must be done! The DCEU must die! (Cut to James physically)
TLOTA: You’re going over the line and now it’s time for me to join the fray! (Cut to James as he goes to the vault behind ORAC’s Chamber and grabs a vortex manipulator and sets the coordinates to the movie and lands in the movie.)
TLOTA: I WON’T LET YOUR BLIND HATRED DESTROY THIS MOVIE E-ROD!
The Blockbuster Buster: I’d rather have every single theater play the MCU for all eternity than let one more movie from this dark and desaturated universe.
TLOTA: Look around before you pre-judge a book by its cover Blockbuster Buster. There’s color, there’s beauty in more ways than one there’s vibrancy where is it in the MCU now? That universe is so shattered yet you’ll keep giving it money to basically criminalize heroism? (The Blockbuster Buster looks around and sees the color and vibrancy James sees)
The Blockbuster Buster: I want to see what you’re seeing but Zack Snyder destroyed my desire in this!
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): And you two are destroying the pacing of the movie.
The Blockbuster Buster: What pacing?
TLOTA: Excuse my associate! (James gives The Blockbuster Buster a wedgie and drags him towards a rock as the battle resumes off screen as James looks and The Blockbuster Buster doesn’t care)
TLOTA: Now to this movie’s credit I like the movie being set World War I instead of World War II which was a smart move on DC’s part. It subverts the “World War II was the Start of the Superheroes” trope and if E-Rod watched this movie instead of being an obstinate Jack-Ass in never seeing another DCEU movie he might be enjoying this as much as I am!
Blockbuster Buster: You know if I gave a flying frog’s fart about this movie, I’d say that this would be an interesting twist on the origin story. (Cut to images of the first Comic Book appearance of “Wonder Woman” as The Blockbuster Buster and James do a voiceover)
Blockbuster Buster (Voiceover): As everyone knows that the character originated in Second World War, as a matter of fact every well-known TRUE DC and Marvel Superhero started out in the Second World War.
TLOTA (Voiceover): Well believe it or not I like this change it eschews the overused Second World War and focuses it on the First War that sent everyone in the World straight to hell! (Cut back to the recreated movie as A WWI German Soldier played by Andrew Beach is seen coming their way as James ducks and lands on The Blockbuster Buster. The Soldier gets up as James superkicks The WWI German Soldier) Heads up there, E-Rod! (Cut to later in the movie as Steve Trevor is being interrogated by the Amazons and James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in.)
TLOTA: After that awesome moment, we discover what Steve’s mission statement is.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): I am a Spy for the good guys to stop the bad guys from taking over the world in this the World War! I have vital information to end the War before more innocent Women, Children and Men die. (Cut to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in.)
TLOTA: Apparently, he found a book of a chemical composition of a deadlier version of Mustard Gas made by a Dr. Poison played by Elena Anaya and he must return to the world of man to give the book to his superiors! After a brief conversation Hippolyta decides that the best course of Action is not to react.
Hippolyta (Played by Olivia Horvath): It is far too dangerous for us to be involved in Man’s World War!
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): And what are we to do with this Steve Trevor?
Amazonian #1 (Played by Renee Miller): I say we castrate him with our dullest weapon, tie him up to a column and beat on him with his own innards! (Others including James and The Blockbuster Buster looking on in Horror at the thought before cutting back to the Amazonian) Is something wrong my Queen?
Hippolyta (Played by Olivia Horvath): It was far too quick and violent a suggestion!
Amazonian #1 (Played by Renee Miller): Just the first thought given to me in my head, that was all my Queen! (Cut to The Blockbuster Buster and James)
TLOTA: Shut up E-Rod! However, Diana believes who maybe the cause of this war.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Mother, I believe this war is the work of Ares, If I were to go, I could stop him with the Godslayer and bring peace to the World.
Hippolyta (Played by Olivia Horvath): No, as much as bringing peace to Man’s World and ending Ares would do good, I cannot allow you to go and as for this Steve Trevor his fate shall be dealt with later.
(Cut to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in.)
TLOTA: Worried that if Ares isn’t dealt with quickly, Diana chooses to defy her mother.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Steve Trevor, go down to the docks not too far from where I found you.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): What are you to do?
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): I must prepare for the end of Ares if he is who you say he is. (Cut to Diana grabbing her shield, The Godslayer and her “Wonder Woman” outfit before reaching the Docks as James, The Blockbuster Buster and Steve Trevor wait in the boat.)
TLOTA: Just as Diana nearly got away with getting Steve out of Themyscira without hesitation. (Audio of Horses Neigh) Right on Cue! Oh, Hai Hippolyta! (An arrow zings James micrometers away from James’ waving hand and James gasps and The Blockbuster Buster’s hair gets center parting!)
Amazonian #1 (Played by Renee Miller): First shot was the warning! Speak and act so pertinent to The Queen Of The Amazons again and I guarantee I shall not miss! AM I TO BE UNDERSTOOD?! (Cut to James, Steve and The Blockbuster Buster as they cover up their private parts)
TLOTA, The Blockbuster Buster & Steve Trevor (In Unison): OF COURSE, WE UNDERSTAND MA’AM! (Cut to Diana and Hippolyta.)
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Mother I know of the consequences of doing this but it is what you would do were you in my place.
Hippolyta (Played by Olivia Horvath): I also know that if you leave Themyscira, you can never return. But seeing as you are packed and ready to go I wish the best for you in your journey in Man’s world and carry this with you, it belonged to Antiope one of the greatest Amazons I’ve ever known. The greatest being you my daughter!
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Goodbye Mother.
(The Boat leaves the Dock as it cuts to the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it act as the commercial break intro and return to the reenacted scenes of the movie while James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in)
TLOTA: On the boat ride to England Steve discovers a little too much for his own good about Diana’s origin.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): I was made from Clay that my mother found and I was brought to life by Zeus himself.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): So, you have no idea about….
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): When it comes to procreation, men are essential, but for pleasure, not necessary.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): Okay then, well let’s get some sleep.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): But who will steer the ship?
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): We’ll let the two Vaudevillians steer us for a while. (Cut to James and The Blockbuster Buster)
TLOTA: He means us, ROCKET!
The Blockbuster Buster: Well then…. (The Blockbuster Buster pulls out “Lucille”) Time to sink the ship! (James pulls out a Sonic Screwdriver)
TLOTA: Delta Level Defense! (The Blockbuster Buster gets knocked unconscious and James steers the ship before cutting to when the group reaches London)
TLOTA: They finally arrive in London and Steve meets up with Etta Candy played by Lucy Davis and they decide to help Diana survive Jolly London Town incognito.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): How does one fight in such clothing?
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): The short version, they don’t.
TLOTA: And as much as it pains you Blockbuster Buster, I give the writers, director and actress Gal Gadot the credit for making this moment entertaining because under the wrong circumstances this could’ve been very bad comedy but she eventually does find herself donning a disguise and they get the book to the Allied Forces and Diana helps translate the book. It does seem to make sense in the case of Gal Gadot and again she pulls off Wonder Woman PERFECTLY!
The Blockbuster Buster: Oh really, how could she?
TLOTA: She served in the Israeli Defense Forces! (Cut to stills of Gal Gadot in “Fast & Furious” movies and her two recent outings as Wonder Woman as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): And when you think about it, you need to have Army Discipline when you do these movies and Gal Gadot had that and used it when she was in the “Fast And Furious” movies and she also was able to show in the role of Gisele she had the ability to act! So, when they came to her with the role of Diana Prince AKA Wonder Woman, it literally was a no brainer for them to bring her on. (Cut to James and The Blockbuster Buster as James forces The Blockbuster Buster to walk alongside Diana and Steve walk through London.)
TLOTA: Besides there have been very few interpretations that were bad so it is nearly impossible to screw it up! (Cut to Stills of past performers of “Wonder Woman” as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): Of course, the Lynda Carter version IS the most recognizable and iconic for a reason, she embodied all the positive aspects of the Character of Wonder Woman. But just as great as Lynda Carter’s version should be the ones from “The Super Friends” series and of course Susan Eisenberg from the DC Bruce Timm animated universe in Justice League and Justice League Unlimited as well as her performances in the DCAU films. Even Xena actress Lucy Lawless was amazing in the DCAU film “Justice League: The New Frontier” and Keri Russell in the 2009 standalone Wonder Woman animated movie was incredible because they got the character. I can think of very few instances in which the Character was given a disservice like when Adrienne Palicki’s pilot was not even done and they scrapped it before they even gave it a chance or even the Cathy Lee Crosby made for TV movie done in 1974 those are the few times I felt the character was given any sort of disservice. (Cut to the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in.)
TLOTA: At any rate after Steve gives the info to his superiors, Diana and Steve rallies a team of people like Steve to help Diana get to the front and stop Ludendorff and Dr. Poison.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): So, what do you say? Will you assist me and my associate Diana on getting her to the front to help end the War?
Sameer (Played by John Ross Santos): Absolutely!
Charlie (Played by Ed Champion): Aye, I’ll help you and the lass out fella!
Chief (Played by Paulo Fonseca): I will help you too, Kemosabe!
TLOTA: We’re with you too!
The Blockbuster Buster: The Hell I am! (James knocks out The Blockbuster Buster)
TLOTA: Like I said! We’re in! (Cut to later in the recreated movie as The Blockbuster Buster wakes up in the Trenches in the Village of Veld along with everyone else)
TLOTA (Shouting over the shots and explosions): SO, OUR TEAM MAKES IT TO THE VILLAGE OF VELD AND HONESTLY THIS IS POSSIBLY THE MOST BAD-ASS MOMENT IN THE MOVIE AS WONDER WOMAN DECIDES TO TAKE THE FIGHT TO THE SOLDIERS OF THE KAISER AND TO THE CREDIT OF THE DIRECTOR IT’S POSSIBLY THE GREATEST MOMENT OF THE MOVIE BECAUSE IT NOT ONLY SHOWS ONE OF THE GREAT BATTLE OF THE WAR BUT ALSO ITS HORRORS WITHOUT HOLLYWOOD GLAMORIZING IT!
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): YOU ARE NOT GOING OUT THERE! IT IS FREAKING NO MAN’S LAND!
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): I AM AN AMAZON! WHO SAID I WAS A MAN?!
TLOTA (Shouting over the shots and explosions): I’M COMING WITH YOU! SO IS HE!
The Blockbuster Buster (Shouting over the shots and explosions): OH REALLY, I’M SAYING THIS RIGHT NOW! NO! WAY! IN! HELL!
TLOTA (Shouting over the shots and explosions): THEN YOU CAN STAY HERE AND BE A COWARD OR YOU CAN GO OUT THERE AND HERO UP! (The Blockbuster Buster thinks for two seconds as Wonder Woman climbs up the ladder before cutting to the outside of the trench as a beam of light is seen before cutting to the enemy trenches and them looking on in wonder as Wonder Woman climbs out and a being of light jumps out of the trench and joins her which becomes James Faraci The Last Of The Americans in his Battle mode and The Blockbuster Buster flies out of the trench as well, the German Colonel played by Andrew Beach shouts “OPEN FIRE” in German and they open fire as Wonder Woman deflects the bullets and James deflects them with the Sword Of Caliverti and The Blockbuster Buster uses the lightning from the hammer to attack as the German soldiers continue their offensive as in the background as 2:36-2:58 of “American Bad Ass” by Kid Rock plays before the audio cuts to the first lyrics and first chorus then the final chorus of “American Bad Ass” by Kid Rock plays as the three go on the attack using their arsenal before the troops in the trenches move forward heroically ending with James using his 303 Lee Enfield British Rifle to shoot several The German soldiers then using his sword to Blockbuster Buster’s hammer attack on him and redirect it through the Enemy Trenches before cutting to The Blockbuster Buster grabbing the Hammer in the Village of Veld after the sniper in the Church is sent hurdling through the sky)
The Blockbuster Buster: Busted!
(Cut to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie they’re in.)
TLOTA: After the Village of Veld is saved by Wonder Woman and her team, a photo-op occurs that leads to the photo that is in the prologue before the first act and is the reason why the movie begins in the first place! Smile Blockbuster Buster!
The Blockbuster Buster: NEVER! (James clenches his fist!) Okay! I’ll smile! (Cut to the photo as The Blockbuster Buster flips James off as he’s forced to smile in the photo and James holding up the Peace sign before cutting to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie.)
TLOTA: That night, Diana and Steve enjoy a tender moment in which they dance.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): This is not dancing, this is simply swaying to the music as a matter of fact Blockbuster Buster hand me your phone!
The Blockbuster Buster: Fine! But I better get it back! (The Blockbuster Buster gives Diana his smartphone and discovers a video for the Blockbuster Buster to enjoy.) Wow James, is that you getting down to “Uptown Funk”?
TLOTA: Yep that is from my sister’s wedding and I am not ashamed of how I can bust a move!
The Blockbuster Buster: HOLY MOLY CANOLI! You are a dancing fool! Emphasis on the FOOL! (Steve Trevor clocks The Blockbuster Buster with the butt of the gun before cutting to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie)
TLOTA: Sometime later Diana looking rather ravishing believes that General Ludendorff played by Danny Huston is in fact Ares and he has to be finished and trust me he’s already been through enough he was the a-hole who gave Wolverine his Adamantium.
The Blockbuster Buster: What are you talking about?
TLOTA: A reference to the actor who plays Ludendorff, never mind that we get this moment between Diana and Steve.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): Okay, are you sure that Ludendorff is Ares?
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Do you doubt my judgement?
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): No, I don’t doubt your judgement, I just want to make sure all the ducks are in a row, because he’s the link to finding the chemical lab and stopping Dr. Poison.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Oh great, Ares got away from me thanks to you.
Steve Trevor (Played by Nick Yaun): Well maybe he’s not Ares. (A loud explosion is heard and felt before cutting to James and The Blockbuster Buster)
The Blockbuster Buster: What in the Wide World Of Sports was that?
TLOTA: The lethal weapon made by Dr. Poison and Ludendorff. Wiped the entire village of Veld right off the map! (Cut to Diana and Steve on the outskirts of the Village of Veld)
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): I could’ve stopped him! Why did you not let me stop him? I see in you the same thing in the German Soldiers. I must go alone from this moment forward. (Cut to later in the recreated movie as James and The Blockbuster Buster talk about the movie)
TLOTA: Diana eventually gets to General Ludendorff and… (The Sound of the Godkiller going through human flesh and metal before we see parallels between Wonder Woman and the real Ares played by Eric Kurtzke in Suit and between James and The Blockbuster Buster.)
The Blockbuster Buster: Well that settles this movie is garbage, The DCEU is permanently blacklisted and I must now destroy everything about The DCEU to give it the proper reboot.
TLOTA: Okay, I’ve had it, alright I admit it that yes, the DCEU started out in a rough patch, When Superman snapped Zod’s neck, I was surprised but it gave Zod the ultimate win. Does it mean Superman is a cold-blooded killer? Hell no! Should Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice and Suicide Squad not have been released? You bet your tiny little kiester! Should you give the DCEU one more break OH HELL YES!
The Blockbuster Buster: You Idiotic Italian Imbecile, you need someone to set your brains to the real world the DCEU is a failure it needs to be destroyed and rebooted. Screw the money Warner Brothers and DC would lose, I want the DC Movies to be better than this crap and the fact that you would defend this garbage should force me to revoke your status as an Internet Reviewer.
TLOTA: Coming from someone who constantly reviews Michael Bay’s Transformers movies you don’t have a leg to stand on! Because guess what, saying that The Transformers movies stink and no one should ever watch these movies because you don’t like them is something I can get behind, but guess what Estúpido, people are still going and knowing that they’re going to watch because you don’t like the movies but you haven’t blacklisted The Transformers movies because…. Yeah, I thought so no comeback on that one. Why don’t you review The Last Knight so the idiots can waste their money on the same rehashed film instead of giving something different a chance like say this movie. No wonder the Legion Of Bad-Assitude is turning its back on you! (The Blockbuster Buster smacks James out of frame as Ares sends Wonder Woman flying out of frame.)
The Blockbuster Buster: TAKE IT BACK OR I WILL BUST YOU! (Wonder Woman and James come back into frame and say “BRING IT ON!” as both groups fight and an instrumental of the Megas XLR main theme is playing in the foreground and James hold off all the attacks from The Blockbuster Buster and Diana is barely holding her own against Ares! The Blockbuster Buster tries to use the Lightning to electrocute James but he uses Aeon’s ring to deflect the power and uses it to strengthen Wonder Woman as she goes up against Ares with both couples being knocked down. James starts to get up a little winded and pops his left arm back into place and howls like an ape as The Blockbuster Buster gets up as well.)
The Blockbuster Buster (Exhausted and slurred): Why… Why the hell are you still fighting? Fighting for the DCEU is a losing battle.
TLOTA (Exhausted and slurred): It’s not over until it’s over!
The Blockbuster Buster (Exhausted and slurred): It was over by Batman V Superman Dawn of the cluster dumb.
TLOTA (Exhausted and slurred): I’ll admit it, it wasn’t the best movie I ever saw but there was some good in it. I still think there is hope for the DCEU. While there’s life there’s hope.
The Blockbuster Buster (Exhausted and slurred): Listen to me The DCEU is done let it die already!
TLOTA (Exhausted and slurred): That doesn’t sound like The Blockbuster Buster, it sounds like the DCEU’s audience.
The Blockbuster Buster (Exhausted and slurred): I must have hit you a little too hard! You’re not making sense
TLOTA (Exhausted and Slurred): Allow me to show you! (James pulls out the Sword of Caliverti) Sword of Caliverti show The Blockbuster Buster the darkness inside him! Give him sight… beyond… sight! (The Blockbuster Buster’s eyes turn white as he sees his complaining about the DCEU and slowly seeing him devolve into a Troll with every complaint and comment as the music for Thundercats “Sight Beyond Sight” plays throughout before returning to the recreated movie)
The Blockbuster Buster: Oh god, is that inside me?
TLOTA: It’s in all of us! It’s how we control what is inside that either makes us to do better or be completely miserable creatures on the internet. So, what do you say, we help Wonder Woman stop Ares together. (James extends his hand before cutting to The Blockbuster Buster)
The Blockbuster Buster: Together! (The two shake hands and the final notes in the “Justice League Unlimited” theme plays as the two join Diana as Ares continues to fight her. James hits Ares with the combined power of his four artifacts and it barely fazes The God of War. The Blockbuster Buster throws Lucille with every ounce of power he has dropping the God of War like a bad habit in the process knocking the helmet off Ares but shattering the head of the Hammer in the process.)
The Blockbuster Buster: My Hammer, it’s destroyed! Okay Ares prepare to… (The Blockbuster Buster turn see the face of Ares is the same as his!) Lazarus Dark, I thought you were gone for good. (Ares chuckles evilly)
Ares (Vocally by James in his lowest tone): You fool, I am you fully realized! I am the true Blockbuster Buster and I shall show you the truth! (Ares grabs both The Blockbuster Buster and Wonder Woman and shows them the ideal worlds they want.)
Ares (voiceover done vocally by James in his lowest tone): Behold what man is capable of! But what can happen if you give yourselves to me! Peace amongst the peoples of the world, movies with characters from Marvel succeeding in the movies and DC in the Television, no more fear of death, no more worry of limits, all shall be good! (Cut to James as he gets through the protective shielding and knocks Ares away with the powers of the artifacts and James deciding on who to save first as it looks like The Blockbuster Buster and Wonder Woman are turning black and dying with James deciding to save Wonder Woman first as he mind melds with Wonder Woman as it cuts to Diana’s fantasy world)
TLOTA (Echoing audio only): Diana…. Diana…. Diana, I am going to show you the truth… the truth… the truth hidden in the lies... the lies… the lies… the lies. (The fantasy fades to reality to when Steve and Diana were together for the last time and they say their lines in silence and as he sacrifices himself and Diana shouts silently “STEVE” before she nearly kills Dr. Poison played by Brenda Fonseca by dropping a tank onto Dr. Poison.)
TLOTA (Echoing audio only): He died believing in you… in you… in you! You must not let his death be in vain… in vain… in vain. Fight the lies with the love you believe in… believe in… believe in. The love Steve believed in is in you Diana… Diana… Diana. Don’t let the lies kill that love… that love… that love. (Cut back to James and Diana as she is revived as the two scrambles to get to The Blockbuster Buster as he mumbles out loud about what he’s seeing)
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Your friend, Is he? (James pulls out his Tri-corder)
TLOTA: He’s fading. I can save him. Save the world with the love inside you and the love Steve had for you.
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): Thank you, my friend! (Wonder Woman runs out of frame as James mind melds as it cuts to James in The Blockbuster Buster’s fantasy world)
TLOTA (Echoing audio only): E-Rod…. E-Rod…. E-Rod, I am going to show you the truth… the truth… the truth hidden in the lies... the lies… the lies… the lies. (Cut to the inside of the Multiplex The Blockbuster Buster is standing inside of his fantasy world before zooming into a theater in the Multiplex as we see a couple played by Paulo and Brenda Fonseca disgusted by Captain America: Civil War.)
Joel (played by Paulo Fonseca): This is Garbage! I enjoyed “X-Men Origins: Wolverine” more than I did this.
Mary (played by Brenda Fonseca): And didn’t you dislike that and “X-Men: Apocalypse”?
Joel (played by Paulo Fonseca): Yeah, but I’m avoiding “The Avengers” movies because I know it’s bad. I hope DC can finally return to the big screens. (The Camera moves away from the Couple watching “Captain America: Civil War” to a couple in another theater watching “Spider-Man 3” played by Rebecca Yaun and Nick Yaun)
Mike (Played by Nick Yaun): God this is so dumb!
Bridget (Played by Rebecca Yaun): I know, I’d KILL just to see Superman taking on Zod again or hell see if DC can keep up with Marvel and their Cinematic universe. (The Camera moves away from the Couple watching “Spider-Man 3” to a group of friends in another theater in the lower level watching “Elektra” played by John Santos, Mike Santos, Eric Kurtzke, Renee Miller, Olivia Horvath, Ed Champion and Andrew Beach)
Kevin (Played by John Santos): This movie sucks!!
Bill (Played by Mike Santos): Yeah, I would kill for a real superheroine movie.
Frank (Played by Eric Kurtzke): Even Wonder Woman would be better than this awful movie
Kinga (Played by Renee Miller): She could be done well
Synthia (Played by Olivia Horvath): I know it’ll be better than this dreck and it will be much more entertaining.
Trace (Played by Ed Champion): We need something that must be better.
Jonah (Played by Andrew Beach): We all hope that way! (The Camera moves away frenetically moving along the Theater in the lobbies as “A Good Man” by Murray Gold from 1:08-3:21 plays in the foreground.)
The Blockbuster Buster (Audio only): I see inside your head! I know how you think James! I see people tired of the bland and overdone! I see the want for something better with what is there! I see not the rage but something stronger than fanboy rage! I see the truest forces of good in any fandom there is. Faith, Love and… (A Bright light shines before cutting back to the two as The Blockbuster Buster opens his eyes)
The Blockbuster Buster: Hope! (James reaches out his hand to The Blockbuster Buster and The Blockbuster Buster reciprocates as James picks him up. The Blockbuster Buster reaches out as the Handle to his hammer comes to him then he does his Hammer twirling before seeing the head of the hammer is reformed!) Thank you, James! You restored hope to me! Now let’s use hope, faith and love of the fandoms and vanquish that dark demonic deity once and for all! (James and The Blockbuster Buster Smiles happily before the music cuts to “The Majestic Tale (of An Idiot With a Box)” by Murray Gold as the Two join in Diana as they take on Ares attacking with everything they have inside as the power of the Hope in The Blockbuster Buster supercharges his blasts to Ares shattering his armor into oblivion with Lucille, the power of Faith in James Faraci The Last Of The Americans as he uses the combined forces of the Artifacts to weaken Ares as he takes on the face and body of Zack Snyder played by Paulo Fonseca and Love inside Wonder Woman as she sends one of Ares’ lightning bolts back onto him before cutting to James and The Blockbuster Buster as they combine their strengths inside and channel it into Wonder Woman)
Ares (Vocally by James in his lowest tone): WHAT IS HAPPENING?!
TLOTA: WE COMBINE THE FAITH OF THE FANBOYS AND FANGIRLS INTO THIS ONE!
The Blockbuster Buster: WE COMBINE THE HOPE OF FANBOYS AND FANGIRLS INTO THIS ONE!
“Wonder Woman” (Played by Rebecca Yaun): AND THOUGH THE POWER OF LOVE INSIDE OF ME, I DIANA OF THEMYSCIRA DAUGHTER OF HIPPOLYTA VANQUISH YOU ARES TO THE DEPTHS OF HADES FROM WHENCE YOU CAME! FARETHEEWELL MY BROTHER! (Diana clashes her bracelets together and disintegrates Ares down on a sub-sub-sub atomic level as Ares shouts “NO!” and a flash of light is seen before cutting to James and The Blockbuster Buster in James’ Studio.)
The Blockbuster Buster: So where are we in the movie now?
TLOTA: We’re not, we’re back in my Studio.
The Blockbuster Buster: Huh, not a bad place. Why haven’t I been here before?
TLOTA: You were in your Blockbuster Buster sleep for my annual Christmas Party or however you do what you do now when you take a break. Look I know I can’t convince you to give The DCEU the last chance I’m giving it because it deserves it and Wonder Woman gave me the chance to believe in the hope that the DCEU can be salvaged! (Cut to recreated clips of “Wonder Woman” and stills of the other DCEU as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover): And for many I understand why they think the DCEU is beyond salvation but me personally, if you forget Suicide Squad, Man Of Steel & Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice happened and give this one a watch, you’ll see why. The story is amazing, the acting is incredibly on point, the action is fifty times better than anything Michael Bay could do at his worst, the directing is amazing and there is something that nearly makes me believe the DCEU is watchable. That’s a miracle in itself. As a standalone movie it truly, truly works. As the last hope of the DCEU, it does its job right enough to do so. If this review gives some poor guy who has had it with comic book movies the ability to enjoy the DCEU and they feel it deserves that one last chance then I strongly suggest you go for it and see this movie for yourself. See it in the theaters, get it on Blu-Ray, DVD, and Digital HD Download and finally see the Spark of hope being kindled in the DCEU at last. (Cut to James and the Blockbuster Buster in James’ office)
The Blockbuster Buster: I see where you are coming from James. But I cannot and shall not take it off the blacklist they disappointed me one too many times!
TLOTA: Okay, E-Rod, how about this, let the fanboys and fangirls decide whether you should see it or not and if you see it and enjoy it. Will you finally relent into taking the DCEU OFF your blacklist?
The Blockbuster Buster: Maybe. But until next time I’m E-Rod and I’m The Blockbuster Buster! Allons-Y! (The Blockbuster Buster snaps his fingers and flies into James’ DVD collection and “The Three Stooges” movie from 2012 movie and it smacks into James and he grabs it off the floor.)
TLOTA: Hmm, I might get a good review out of this pile of crap that bears the name of the Comedic Icons. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That’s my opinion!