How The "Muppets" are back for "Now"

  (0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Fade cut to James in his room at his house)

TLOTA:
I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and Yeah still at home, and in Quarantine but guess what, thanks to my family we now have Disney+ and one of the first things that I saw was something my niece wanted to see. (Cut to live action Mulan title credit. Cut to James) NO! Something that she and I could both enjoy! (Cut to the title of "Muppets Now!" then clips of the host segments with Scooter as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
"Muppets Now" is sort of idea Jim Henson would have thought of, if he were still around. Taking the Muppet Show concept and trying to see how it would work with sketches, a wraparound segment featuring a host, and plenty of Muppet Silliness, Some Subtle Educational moments and guest stars that would appeal to everyone. Does the series work? Or will it be another short lived series that tried to put the squeeze on the Muppets making them the Square Pegs in Disney's Round Hole? (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Well let's see if this Muppets Wish Day wish is granted and this is a good series, this is "Muppets Now"(Cut to the title of "Muppets Now!" then clips of the host segments with Scooter as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Something to note that in every intro is Matt Vogel's Kermit The Frog telling us the title of the show and that it's being streamed to us from the Muppets Studio and as I said before that it's taking me some time for me to get used to the new voice of Kermit and yeah he hasn't grown on me, YET! I will be patient, it took me sometime to accept Steve Whitmire as Kermit, so be patient with Matt, he'll get to a likable facsimile of Kermit The Frog but until then yeah I'm saying it's Matt Vogel's Kermit The Frog. But I digress, in the pilot episode Matt Vogel's Kermit The Frog hands the hosting duties to Scooter who has all of episodes of the shows on a hard drive and it's up to Scooter to make sure that the episodes are loaded by a certain time and the show lasts about 22 minutes and in the segments with him he has someone to play off of. In the pilot it's Kermit in an unofficial passing of the torch and in subsequent episodes we have Fozzie, Statler & Waldorf, Animal, Chip the I.T. Guy and finally Robin. However this series also saw the premiere of two new characters, Beverly Plume and Joe From Legal and to be honest, they feel like the sore thumbs in the show and as time went on Beverly should've thanked her lucky feathers none of the episodes of the show she was hosting didn't have turkey, Otherwise Beverly would've been roasted! As for Joe from Legal, well... (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Let me share something with you that he sent. "While you are within your legal rights to review this under Fair Use Acts know that if your review is awful I will act upon you as you get sued to the earth's core! I should know I can dig that far." That was his first message, then he sent a second one with what I can assume is a very loud and powerful laugh because it is in Large text and goes on as "BWAAAAAAAAAAAAH-AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Okay Joe, thanks for that! (Cut to clips of the shorts in "Muppets Now" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
The First sketch posted by Scooter is LifeSty...(Cut to James as he goes to his tablet and Miss Piggy contacts James through DUO)

Miss Piggy:
LIFESTY LE! LIFESTYLE! GET IT IT RIGHT OR ELSE YOU WILL HEAR FROM ME AND FEEL ME COMING AT YA!! (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Miss Piggy, you caught me in mid word, I was about to say "LifeStyle With Miss Piggy" (Cut to the screen on James' tablet as she giggles with a bit of nervousness)

Miss Piggy:
Well, Oopsie on my part! Keep at what you're doing! Ta-Ta! ( The Screen goes dark as it cuts to James)

TLOTA:
What is my life right now?(Cut to clips of "LifeStyle with Miss Piggy" in "Muppets Now" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
As I was trying to say the first sketch posted is the beginning of a series of  self help ideas hosted by Miss Piggy called "LifeStyle" it has tidbits of information for style and living. It also has Taye Diggs doing something with Miss Piggy and Linda Cardellini chatting with Miss Piggy as they answer questions from fans. It's in all the episodes and while it is Miss Piggy being the Diva she is, I think it's good for what it is. My favorite series of sketches? Well.... (Cut to the opening of Okey Dokey Kookin then clips of Okey Dokey Kookin as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
"Okey Dokey Kookin" has Beverly Plume  hosting a cooking challenge of sorts as famous chefs appear making recipes that is meant to make the mouth water and of course The Swedish Chef being well The Swedish Chef. My favorite episode of this series of sketches has of all people the most bad ass actor and restauranteur Machete himself Danny Trejo! However the tension between Beverly and The Swedish Chef is palpable because he has his way of things and Beverly just gives the poor guy Tsouris for it but I love it because when I first saw this series it was with my youngest niece and she laughed and enjoyed it as much as I do! She also loved another series of sketches which harkens The Muppets back to the days when they were on Sesame Street. (Cut to the opening of "Muppet Labs Field Test" then clips of "Muppet Labs Field Test" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
"Muppet Labs Field Test" as hosted by Beaker and Dr. Bunson Honeydew always starts off with a disclaimer not to do their experiments at home given to us by Kermit The Frog and Joe From Legal. The experiments have actual Scientific merit and educational material and the scientists that come in as unsuspecting "guests" that helps in the experiments that go the way Beaker and Bunson would hope would go! This is the one sketch that puts the series into the E/I Programing category. (Cut to shows with the E/I Programming label as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
For those who are wondering the E/I Programing is when a show is both entertaining and informative, shows like the original "Saved By The Bell" series or something like "Fraggle Rock" and of course "Sesame Street" or even the "Back To The Future" animated series. Now I have nothing against it as long as it doesn't insult the intelligence and somehow educate without coming off preachy or like an educator overdoing it. But I digress. (Cut to clips of "Muppet Labs Field Test" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
To me this is one of the best series of Sketches that everyone can enjoy

(Cut to opening of "Pepe's Unbelievable Game Show" then clips from "Pepe's Unbelievable Game Show" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):

The one series of sketches that people automatically thought were the ones closer to say how The Muppets were taking potshots at a certain site that claims itself as "Awesome" even though there are a group of Meshugginah Schmucks and Feygulahs and a game show that was made by them, this apparent pot shot is "Pepe's Unbelievable Game Show" which if you ask me is Chaos and has no structure as opposed to the fact that the Game Show that was made was by those Schmucks which was something I did enjoy, it had me laughing and being able to get to see how much better I was and if that show had continued I would be glad to have either hosted or taken the series and continued it in the same way but changed certain elements, making it like "Win Ben Stein's Money". But apparently this was a fan favorite to many. Myself, eh not so much, because call me cuckoo but the more the host tries to keep the show organized and the contestants make that impossible is the best route to go, "Pepe's Unbelievable Game Show"? Not my cup of tea!

(Cut to the openings of "Muppet Masters" & "Mup Close & Personal" then clips of both shorts as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA(Voiceover):

The least used sketches was that of Muppet Masters and "Mup Close & Personal". The short amount of episodes that were on which is hosted by Walter features Kermit showing off that he is a Master Photobomber and that Uncle Deadly is well versed in theatrical swordplay. But the development that surprised me was that of Walter's as he comes in fully researched and educated on the subjects that the supposed "Masters" know about. And as for "Mup Close and Personal, while having RuPaul, the very lovely Aubrey Plaza and Seth Rogen. While we learn some things about the subjects of the episodes and The Muppets hosting get better in the subjects they talk about. And for me my favorite episode was the one with Aubrey because, let's face it, I'm a dude! I'm not ashamed nor am I completely blind. I really hope that (Cut to clips of the host segments with Scooter as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
One thing I noticed thanks to fans on YouTube and on other reviews have noticed certain things on Scooter's screen. Some see stuff like a baby Scooter and a possible notice of Skeeter who was in the original Muppet Babies. Some people notice that there is a vault that's bulging, these people claim that all five years of the original Muppets Show that have been held back since Disney bought The Muppets Lock Stock & Barrel and did not release seasons 4 & 5. Again that's a fan theory. Until Disney+ does confirm that they are releasing the series on said streaming service nothing will be confirmed! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
But after talking about this series, my thoughts? Well...(Cut to clips of the shorts in "Muppets Now" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
I will say that the series is a good start for a restart for The Muppets to try and get them back in the mainstream. The shorts have a mix of entertaining and educational, a sense of what Jim Henson would do with The Muppets to get them back to action if he was still around. I really suggest you check it out on Disney+ and if it gets a physical media copy, I strongly suggest you get it. (Cut to James physically as there is a knock on the door and James steps out the front door, looks around and hears the door close behind him and sees Miss Piggy)

TLOTA:
Well, this is gonna suck for me! (Cut to Miss Piggy)

Miss Piggy:
LIKE A VACUUM CLEANER! HAI-YAH! (James gets Karate chopped into geosynchronistic orbit and screams then shouts "I'M JAMES FARACI THE LAST OF THE AMERICANS AND THAT'S MY OPINION!"

Survival of "The Shootist"

 

This review and the remaining reviews I do from this moment forward is dedicated in Loving memoriam of
Robert N. Faraci Sr.
1943-2020

(Scene begins with a laser hitting a slab of Titanium as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as three shadowed figures with a lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As the three run out of frame moving forward, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left and John and Mike Santos and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left and Olivia Horvath appear in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written and directed by James Faraci, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions” as it ends the Laser beam disappears and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appear. At the 0:32-0:36 mark the word “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down and  James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Fade cut to James in his room sitting in contemplation as to whether to continue or not as echoes of Chad Narducci’s voice chewing James out with Vitriolic Hate ring in James’ head. James sighs and is looking at a blank screen on his Microsoft Word Program.)

TLOTA:
What am I going to do? All I do is get chewed out by the people I need the most and the people I want to be with me, don’t want anything to do with me. Further complicating things… (James looks up from his Computer to see a photo of him and his father as the two of them and his older brothers are coming off a fishing trip with their fish. Cut to James as he begins to cry and say “Dad”)

TLOTA (Crying):
Dad, Rob I wish you guys were with me. (James continues to cry for 30 Seconds, sits and sighs)

TLOTA:
What am I going to do? James Faraci The Last Of The Americans, What can I do?  Do I even continue?(James sighs as he looks on Amazon Prime and sees “The Shootist” on there. Cut to James looking at the screen and sighs.) The Shootist, the last great western of any generation, the last great John Wayne movie, the last movie of a bygone era, maybe this will be the movie will be the last roundup for me! Maybe it’s apropos for what might be my final one. (James hits the play button as John Wayne played by James appears in the same room as James. Cut to James!)

TLOTA:
Well, I think the fact that I am seeing John Wayne here is just proof that the last drop of sanity has evaporated. (Cut to John Wayne as he grabs the chair next to James)

John Wayne:
You know something James, just because I’m sitting here don’t mean you’ve fallen off the horse. It’s you just working through your problems, but you shouldn’t be doing it alone. (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Okay, I’ll bite. Mr. Wayne, I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans. It’s in my title to try and handle my problems alone. (Cut to John Wayne.)

John Wayne:
“The Last Of The Americans”? (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Well, the last one of any generation after the 1970’s and early 1980’s to be raised on you and guys like Brando, James Dean, Tony Curtis, Kirk Douglas and the real actors who could make great movies. As a matter of fact, HOW DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?! (Cut to John Wayne)

John Wayne:
Well Pilgrim, you know what that Chris Rock fellow say in that Blasphemous “Dogma” movie? He was right. (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Well that doesn’t help me out at all! (Cut to the title of “The Shootist” as it cuts to clips of “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Considered to be one of the best if not one of the last well known Western movies ever made, boasting a full cast of amazing actors including John Wayne in his final performance. “The Shootist” based on the book by Glendon Swarthout is probably a must watch for anyone especially when it comes to movie aficionados, and for those who see the current crop of films as garbage and leave a bad taste in your mouth. (Cut to James sitting next to John Wayne)

John Wayne:
So I take it you’re not a fan of what’s out there in the cinemas.

TLOTA:
If you see half of what’s out… WHAT AM I DOING?! I have what maybe my last review. Let’s go right into “The Shootist” (Cut to clips of “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
So our movie opens as we hear a voiceover about John Bernard Books or J.B. Books for short performed by a young fellow known as Gillom played by Ron Howard. (Cut to James and John Wayne)

John Wayne:
Little Ron Howard, I often wonder what happened to that fella after the movie… (Cut to images of all of Ron Howard’s films. Cut to James and John Wayne) He was in all of them?

TLOTA:
He Directed them. (John Wayne Chuckles at that)

John Wayne:
Well kid, if that don’t beat all! (Cut to clips of “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
We soon cut to 1901 as we see J.B. Books played by John Wayne as he heads to Carson City Nevada. On the way there someone with the I.Q. of his clothing try to rob J.B.  but ends as you’d expect seeing as how John Wayne would handle it. (Show clip of J.B. Books as he handles the guy trying to rob J.B. Books would. Cut to James and John Wayne.)

TLOTA:
I’m fine, this is you we’re talking about. (Cut to clips of “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
We soon see J.B. make it to Carson City on the Day Queen Victoria died.

John Wayne (Voiceover):
Just how the timing worked.

TLOTA (Voiceover):
As J.B. makes it to town, he makes it to Doc Hostetler played by James Stewart for an examination and the prognosis is grim. He’s been diagnosed with an advanced form of cancer. Knowing he’s facing his own mortality J.B. asks Doc to not tell anyone he’s in town, taking residence at the Rogers residence as a lodger. There Gillom and his mother Bond played by Lauren Bacall take him in however the first few hours in the place J.B. pretty much makes enemies with both Bond and Gillom (Cut to James and John Wayne)

John Wayne:
Now you just stop, take off your glasses and stand up, right here and now. (James acquiesces to John Wayne's request.)

TLOTA:
Why? (John Wayne clocks James stupid)

John Wayne:
That’s why! It’s not that J.B. Books was out to make enemies, he was just trying to settle in, wasn’t expecting Gillom to be so strong willed or Bond be so head strong, he just had expectations on how things were. You okay there James?

(Cut to James as he sits seeing all of John Wayne’s characters circling around his head. Cut to John Wayne as he walks out to grab something it fades to black then cuts to the 0:36 Mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James fully morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Cut to the 0:36 Mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James fully morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Cut to James and John Wayne in James’ room)

John Wayne:
You okay to continue?

TLOTA:
Are you kidding? Getting punched by John Wayne is an honor. An honor I can never reveal because people will think I’ve gone around the bend and in my profession, that’s too easy. How’s your hand?

John Wayne:
Boy I heard of Cast Iron Jaws, but yours must be plated with something that makes it super harder than that!
(Cut to “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Going under the name William Hickok from Abilene Kansas as a profession is a U.S. Marshal. Bond lets “Hickok” knows where he stands with her. Meanwhile at the Livery Stable Moses played by Scatman Crothers and Gillom discover the owner of the horse that Gillom and Bond’s Lodge is. Armed with that information Gillom tells his mother about J.B. Books being in her house. Taking the news well, Gillom is told to hit the hay! The next day Bond is none too pleased to have J.B. lodging in her home and wants him out. But J.B. pleads his case to stay however the local Marshal Walter Thibido played by Harry Morgan tells J.B. to hit the road. J.B. tells the Marshal about his condition and asks not to tell anyone that he’s here. Marshal Thibido obliges after making fun of J.B.’s condition and wishes he die quickly and in my opinion, that was a cold low blow! (Cut to James and John Wayne)

John Wayne:
Well, J.B. was so feared that he became a legend of sorts in the west.

TLOTA:
Well even legends deserve some respect! Why did you think I acquiesced to your request to stand up and take my glasses off?

John Wayne:
You made your point. (Cut to “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
After Gillom tries to sneak up on J.B., news of J.B. Books being in Carson City hits causing trouble for everyone. Apologizing for hiding under the name of Hickok and telling Bond of his conditions. Bond allows J.B. to stay. As the days go on J.B. Books has to deal with a reporter named Dan Dobkins who wants to write on the daily exploits of J.B. however J.B. tells Dan Dobkins to hit the road and meeting  back with Doc Hostetler for a prescription of Laudanum for a pain killer and all of that. Going to an Undertaker to order a headstone but rejects the free funeral because J.B. is afraid that The Undertaker played by John Carradine would sell to see J.B.’s remains. One night two unknown people looking for notoriety try to sneak up on J.B. however like in the beginning of the movie he dispatches with them. However, this becomes a problem for Bond as Lodgers continue to hit the road knowing that they’re in danger as long as J.B. Books is there. Also concerning Bond is the fact that Gillom maybe getting a bit too close for her own good. One day as Bond and J.B. decide to travel they come upon an old associate of J.B.’s Mike Sweeny played by Richard Boone. Meanwhile J.B. and Gillom get into a heated debate over J.B.’s Horse. However, after telling Gillom about J.B.’s death sentence things change between the two as J.B. over a series of shooting lessons.  (Cut to James and John Wayne as James sighs)

John Wayne:
Remind you of something?

TLOTA:
Just good times between me and my dad at the Shooting Range, fishing on the Reservoir, Salmon River fishing upstate, deer hunting, small game hunting, bird hunting, all those good times upstate in the hunting camp.

John Wayne:
As long as you hold onto them, you ain’t ever gonna forget him. 

TLOTA:
Thanks for that. 

(Cut to “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
One night an old flame of J.B.’s by the name of Serepta played by Sheree North comes around to discover that J.B. is heading to that big ol’ roundup in the sky. After that J.B. asks Gillom to tell Mike Sweeny, Jack Pulford played by Hugh O’Brian and Jay Cobb, the guy who was driving the Creamery Wagon to meet J.B. at the Metropole Saloon at 11 A.M. on January 29^th. That day comes as J.B.’s headstone comes with the year 1901 on one side and his birthday on the other. And after a bumpy relationship with Bond, J.B. makes his peace with her and gives Gillom his horse and then…(Show shootout as the three “guests” arrive as J.B. Books celebrates as Sweeny, Cobb and Pulford try to shoot J.B. Books and while wounded defends himself. The Bartender shoots J.B. and Gillom shoots the Bartender with J.B. Books’ gun which he throws away as J.B. Books smiles at Gillom’s decision and dies. Gillom covers the body of J.B. Books and walks away as Doc Hostetler comes in to see the damage as Gillom walks away.) And with that the movie ends with the day moving on. No grand finale or moment where Gillom is hearing J.B. Books give out some good advice on things, the movie ends with the world moving forward, as if John Bernard “J.B.” Books was meant to leave the earth that day. (Cut to James and John Wayne)

John Wayne:
And why not pass away after going through such hell he deserved to be at peace the day he was born.

TLOTA:
Because it didn’t have any dignity, it was just sad and painful to see the world moving on while you’re stuck with the pain of knowing you…

John Wayne:
You were there when the time came to pass weren’t ya.

TLOTA:
Me and my mom and you know what really hurt was knowing that I was here when it happened. I gave him my lifetime to being there for him and while I was out there playing mouthpiece as “The Last Of The Americans” occasionally, Okay Constantly complaining about him, I was doing everything to help him and it didn’t help.

John Wayne:
Well son, you did the best you could, maybe it was his time to give you your lifetime back. A Second chance for ya.

TLOTA:
To do what? Talk endlessly on stuff no one cares about, to do the same thing I’ve been doing for years now?

John Wayne:
Well maybe that and make sure you get the stuff you sacrificed to help him, get that lifetime back. It’s okay that you mourn him, but it’s time to move on. James, you gotta a second chance, don’t waste it. See ya around there Five Toed Bubba Joe! (James looks up and sees the photo of James and his dad of the two of them celebrating James having just brought in a Salmon and smiles)

TLOTA:
Thanks dad.  Now to finish up my work. (Cut to “The Shootist” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
To say that this is a masterpiece is an understatement, not because it’s a super Special Effects movie, not because it has big stars like John Wayne, Lauren Bacall and Ron Howard but because it was story driven, character driven and most importantly it was dealing with something we all must deal with and while this was John Wayne’s swansong I can honestly say that I am proud to have watched it, I’m glad I enjoyed it and I can say to anyone out there, give this movie a watch and you will know REAL movie making is at it’s best. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and I’m not wasting the second chance I have.