"Wonder"-ing how many years I've been doing this eight years or "84"

(Scene starts with a laser beam in the sky as the music of the 1994 American Gladiators opening theme plays the angle of the camera goes into the laser as three shadowed figures with a lasered outlines appear as the shadows reveal themselves to be James Faraci in the center, Paulo Fonseca on the right and Rebecca Yaun on the left as their names appear above the characters. As the three-run out of frame moving towards the camera, four more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear and the shadows reveal themselves as Brenda Fonseca on the right, Nick Yaun on the left, and John and Mike Santos and their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame moving forward moving towards the camera, five more shadowed figures with lasered outlines appear as they reveal themselves to be Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke on the right, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion on the left, and Olivia Horvath appears in the center as their names appear above the characters. As they run out of frame credits of “Written and directed by James Faraci, Edited by Eric Kurtzke, Makeup by Olivia Horvath Produced by First Choice Productions” as it ends the Laser beam disappears and at the 0:28 mark of the theme song the laser beam cut out the words “The” “Last” “Of” “The” appear. At the 0:32-0:36 mark, the word “Americans” start to come forward as it pulls down, and James’ Morpher and Sonic Screwdriver is flung into the frame as James grabs both and morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Fade cut to James in his office.)

TLOTA:
I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and it’s my EIGHTH ANNIVERSARY! (Cut to a moment of Fireworks and Ode To Joy playing as eight hands unite. Cut to James in his office as booming thuds are heard and James is shaken out of frame. Cut to Chad as he continues to try and break through the door as Black Flames engulf his eyes)

Chad Narducci (Demonic Sounding):
AND IT WILL BE YOUR LAST WHEN I LAY MY HANDS UPON YOU. (Cut to James as he composes himself.)

TLOTA:
And as you can tell, it’s been a bit chaotic, I’m on lockdown, AGAIN! This time in the studio and from what I gathered, everything points to an old nemesis, that nearly got the win had it not been for my friends at the time, now the friends I have and need are indisposed! But in the meanwhile, let’s see what DC has in store for me. (Cut to the opening credit of “Wonder Woman 1984”. Cut to James as he drops his head on the table with a very loud thud. Cut to clips of “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Oh good lord in heaven! Why?! Why?! How?! The first movie remains a masterpiece as to how DC could hold its own against Marvel even as DC’s failures of their shared universe pile up, like a diamond in a pile of turds. However, this movie further throws out any goodwill or hope that DC can make a good movie out the door. But can I find something, ANYTHING to enjoy in this movie? (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Well, between facing Chad or this movie, let’s get to it, this is “Wonder Woman 1984”! (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
The movie opens up in Themyscira as we see the young Diana getting ready to participate in some Amazonian, Olympian, Parkour, Tri-Wizard games, it looks like one mistake on young Diana’s part by missing a signal, and Antiope played again by Robin Wright stops Young Diana from taking the prize because of it. We then cut to the titular year of 1984 where the movie takes place as we soon see Wonder Woman is saving people & fighting crime in Washington DC  which includes fighting off a group of criminals in a mall in a fun yet awesome fight scene! (Show the battle between Wonder Woman and the Criminals. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And I hope you enjoyed that moment because that will be the last time we’ll see Diana as Wonder Woman for a friggin’ hour! Why am I getting Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 Déjà vu vibes and I’m not talking about the good one with Vanilla Ice and Ernie Reyes Jr. I’m talking about the one produced by (James holds back vomit.) The one produced by Mi (James holds back vomit again as he reaches for his Barf Bucket.) Mich…a…el… (James vomits as he says “Bay”! Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
We soon see Diana in her apartment in Washington DC as we notice photos of her friends from the first World War and of course a photo of Steve Trevor so much so, she declines sharing a Taxi with a dude! We soon meet up with Barbara Ann Minerva played by Kristen Wiig and the 1980’s geekiness levels are off the scale! As Barbara loses some papers, Diana decides to help her out of her predicament and befriend her. Oh, and look, the shoes Diana is wearing happen to be Cheetah print! Oh, The foreshadowing! Anyhow, their mutual boss has asked the two of them to work on a project together with the FBI according to the boss,  Yesterday’s heist which was thwarted by Wonder Woman discovered that a Jewelry store was a front for a black market artifact shop! The two come together to help in the artifacts one of them being is something called the dreamstone. As the two quickly become friends over how much they enjoy each other. That night after the dinner Barbara almost holds her own against a mugger when Diana saves her again. Barbara holds the dreamstone and wishes to be like Diana. The next morning Barbara decides to make some minor changes and people start to notice her. Even Maxwell Lord played by Pedro Pascal is looking into her. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Oh yeah, nearly forgot the other big baddy for the movie Pedro Pascal’s Maxwell Lord. Now imagine if you will for the character of Maxwell Lord in this movie a combination of an infomercial salesman, a telemarketer combined with capitalist, and just to add enough unlikability of a televangelist and they tossed in enough 1980’s and that is Maxwell Lord played by Pedro Pascal! That is how Pedro performs this interpretation of Maxwell Lord! (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Diana meets Maxwell Lord as Barbara tells them that he plans on donating to their project and their division. We soon see to no surprise, Maxwell Lord like most of his 1980’s counterparts is a Ponzi Schemer!  Borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and soon enough will be making us all pay the piper! Even his son Alistair will be suffering from his father, especially when he wishes on the dreamstone, to become it! However, Simon Stagg who is a backer is telling Maxwell he’s out and has 48 hours to pay him back or the FTC makes Maxwell suffer. As that is going on Barbara notices her changes are starting to come to her as it is time for a celebration whereof all people someone claiming to be Steve approaches Diana and when the guy hands her a watch the same way Steve did we soon see Steve once again played by Chris Pine physically be seen by Diana but to the rest of the world looks like another guy played by Kristopher Polaha. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
I wonder what happened to him after this event. (Cut to Rowdy as he is dressed like Don Bellisario and a voice played by James Faraci is the guy Kristopher Polaha is.)

The guy (voiced by James Faraci):
It was almost like I was somewhere else and this guy was me! Isn’t that weird?

Don Bellisario (Played by Chris Lee Moore):
You know something, sir, between what you just told me about your experiences in engineering in the Armed Forces, The fact you’re a really strong writer, and very imaginative, I need a man like you on my new show “Quantum Leap” congratulations, my good man, you have just been hired!

 (The Scene fades to black, it then cuts to the 0:36 Mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James fully morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Cut to the 0:36 Mark of the 1994 American Gladiators theme as it shows James fully morphed with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Cut to “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Steve tells Diana everything he remembers up to that point and it is up to Diana to bring Steve up to date and of course have a style montage. While that’s happening Maxwell Lord soon takes Simon Stagg out of the picture and Barbara has started to show some newfound strength. (Show Barbara taking the refrigerator’s door right off its hinges and being able to lift as much as a bodybuilder! Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
For a female wrestler in GLOW! (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
In the meanwhile, Diana continues to help Steve acclimate to the modern world even telling Steve that well (Cut to the clip of Lloyd Christmas as he shouts “WE’VE LANDED ON THE MOON!” Cut to “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
As Maxwell Lord’s business continues to build, Barbara suddenly finds herself more popular and meets Steve and Diana tries to show Steve the stone. Barbara tells Diana that Maxwell Lord took the stone. Steve and Diana try to get in but Diana while trying to break the lock discovers she has lost some of her Amazonian strength. The two get in as Diana discovers that Maxwell Lord has merged with the stone. Diana asks Barbara where the stone originally came from. Diana is now worried about what Maxwell Lord is becoming so the two happen to borrow a Jet which becomes Wonder Woman’s Invisible Jet! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And I hope you enjoy looking at it as much as you could because that is how much screen time The Invisible Jet gets in this movie. Again Déjà vu Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2 produced by… You know who vibes. (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Lord, in the meanwhile, seises the land, oil rights, and the armed forces of a Sheikh as he wishes for his ancestorial lands to be restored to the way the land used to be. Diana and Steve continue to chase him as Diana becomes Wonder Woman once again! However, in the battle, a bullet stops Wonder Woman meaning that the wish she made has caused her to lose her god-like strength and become more mortal! In the meanwhile, the WHOLE FRIGGIN WORLD IS EDGING ITSELF TO THE POINT WHERE “The Day After” would become real! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And given what’s been happening, I think… You know, I was going to hurl an insult at how stupid the people are to think that “The Day After” ends with sunshine and rainbows and unicorns but I think even stupid people know that “The Day After” is not a happy feel-good movie, at least I hope they do. (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Diana, Steve, and Barbara soon discover that the dreamstone is the creation of the Greek god of Mischief, Dolos. Forcing those who do wish to pay a price for the said wish. The legends according to this guru say that the only way to stop the dreamstone was the reason the Mayan culture was wiped out of existence. That and a man called Cortez! Unless the stone is destroyed or the wishes renounced this world is toast! Diana is considering renouncing her wish, however, Barbara isn’t interested in that! During all of that Maxwell Lord visits the President, this is gonna end well. (Show clip of Maxwell Lord as he gains the Powers of the President and the knowledge of a satellite system that airs all over the world. Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Should I do it or should I… Okay, Do It! (Cut to the clip of “Mind Of Mencia” as Punji says “Oh, Of Course!”. Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Diana uses the Lasso of Truth to show Steve the history of the armor of Asteria and the two quickly but too late to stop Max, and not helping is the fact Barbara has joined up with Max. With no other option, Steve tells Diana to let him go. Diana renounces her wish and quickly regaining her powers and gaining the ability to make her way back home and learning to fly, she even rides the lightning to help her get to Maxwell Lord and… WHAT IN THE HELL?! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED TO BARBARA?!  (Cut to a still of “Cheetah” from this movie, a cat from the 2019 BOMB “CATS”, and Jaylah from “Star Trek Beyond” as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (V.O.):
Is this supposed to be Barbara in her Cheetah form?! It looks like a mix facially like Jaylah from “Star Trek Beyond” mixed with the CGI abominations from that god-awful “CATS” movie! (Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
This should’ve been a practical effect with costumes and facial appliances. Would it have been more expensive? Yeah, but at least it would’ve been more convincing than that thing! (Cut to the movie “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
Wonder Woman now donning the armor of Asteria, and honestly, it looks cool and it is a reference to the Kingdom Come comic version of the character, however, I digress, Wonder Woman fights Cheetah, and to be honest, it’s not that bad but it could’ve been better. Wonder Woman drops Cheetah into the water and is electrocuted. Wonder Woman gets her out before Cheetah is killed and goes to confront Maxwell Lord and the world with the truth and then… (Show Max’s backstory and the world going straight to hell as Alistair might be caught in the crossfire as Max and the world renounces their wishes.) So yeah, the power of truth and the love of a father for his son (NOT IN THAT WAY! OUT OF THE GUTTERS!) saves the world. Diana decides to see the world and the joy of knowing things will work out for the better and the movie gets a post-credit scene in which I kid you not! Lynda Carter makes a cameo as an incognito Asteria living amongst us in secret! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
So that was Wonder Woman 1984! Was it as good as the first movie? No. Was it totally god awful? No. Does it have its redeeming points? Yeah. Did a lot of it need to be the way it did? No. Do I recommend it? UH…. (Cut to clips of “Wonder Woman 1984” as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (V.O):
I will say the following. There were great moments but those were far and few between. There were moments that you could tell that everyone was having some modicum of enjoyment, Gal Godot was as usual perfect as Diana Prince. There were a lot of great performances especially from Pedro Pascal, Chris Pine, even Kristen Wiig does a fairly good performance. However a lot of this movie I can write off as a hot mess! The references while nice touches were underutilized, the flashback to Diana in those Amazonian Olympic events was awesome but they were a minor event in this movie. I truly hoped this would be as good as the first one but whether there was studio interference or just the Snyders and director Patty Jenkins going hog wild off the success of the first movie, this is something that I want to recommend but you need to be in the right frame and if from what I’ve heard is true that Warner Brothers has lost faith in both the potential of DC Live-Action Movies and Snyder’s vision of where it could go, something tells me that this upcoming Flash movie will be the final nail in the coffin and if that’s the case, maybe it is time to let DC’s Live-Action Movies rest a bit before another revival. (Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
I, on the other hand, I’m not so lucky. It’s time for me to face my fate, and if this is the end, so be it. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans…you know the rest. (James stands up when he gets something on his phone then walks out to the door.) Okay, Give me one minute, meet me in the lobby, and then you and I will go at it ONE LAST TIME! (Cut to Chad Narducci as he floats.)

Chad Narducci (Sounding Demonic):
I’m not completely without mercy towards my enemies. (Chad makes it to the lobby as the scene cuts to James as he gets ready to face Chad. Cut to Chad as he faces James.)

Chad Narducci (Sounding Demonic):
So you are ready to allow me to kill you. (James pushes Chad away using the gem from the gauntlet.) So you still have some of your powers from the gem! (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Well, yeah and I could say that it was my big attack but trust me, I know if I do attack I could kill Chad and Alex would never forgive me if he dies. But then again Chad you were as weak as I thought you were. I get the fact you hate me, but to allow The Wicked to use you the way that thing is… Dr. Denny was right You are just a little chicken! Cheep-Cheep-Cheep!  (Cut to Chad as he growls and snarls as his head comes out.)

Chad Narducci:
What did you say? (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Yeah, I admit I’m an asshole, oftentimes people would rather not hear from me or help me but the truth is, I’m honest about me.  I know you Chad, let’s face the facts, you and so many have lied to me about helping, but when push came to shove more people lied about helping, about caring, about doing what was right! But every day I am truly thankful for the friends who have stuck it out with me. You’d commend those who left because let’s face it you have no spine! You have more enjoyment from my failures. Yeah, I got plenty of them. I don’t need everyone to rub them in my face. Let’s face it Chad, I may be pathetic but you are a weak-willed, spineless coward who allowed someone to turn you into what he wanted. I may be the biggest asshole on the planet, but I’m honest with who I am and what I am! I am James Benjamin Faraci! I’m from Liberty in the Sullivan County/Hudson Valley/Catskills region of New York, I am the owner of a Time-Space Device, I am a Whovian, A Power Ranger, A relic of the 1980-the 2000s, An Internet reviewer, I AM JAMES FARACI THE LAST OF THE AMERICANS!  WHO IN THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE CHAD NARDUCCI?! (Chad Growls, snarls, screams, and roars as he finally breaks through standing face to face with James as he tries to smack him around as James takes it until Chad tires out and hugs James.)

Chad Narducci:
Why? You took my best and you’re still standing. Why? How?

TLOTA:
It’s how I am! I can take it because of every single fall I’ve taken! I’ve stayed true to who I am because my family made me that way. Chad, look at me, this isn’t just something I put on and take off lightly. I wear it because I do. Chad, I want you to be a friend. I need you as a friend. Let me be the friend to help you. (Chad cries as he says “Yes!” The wind picks up as Chad and James turn towards the source)

Chad Narducci:
What in the hell is that?

TLOTA:
It is something I thought had been destroyed so many times before. The Wicked! (Cut to the cloud of dark energy)

The Wicked:
I am going to destroy you, I have destroyed so much of you, that the physical form will be easy to shatter! (A Voice shouts “I prefer to BUST!” A bolt of electricity as The Wicked dissipates only momentarily to see The Blockbuster Buster and Julia Alexa Miller as they take the position, James runs to a corner as a boom is heard at the door next to James’ office as Linkara and Team TLOTA get ready to fight as well.)

Linkara:
E-Rod!

Blockbuster Buster:
Linkara! (Cut to James in the corner)

TLOTA:
Okay on my signal! (James tosses Blu-Rays of “Ghostbusters” 1 & 2 to John, Mike, Paulo, and Nick! A Blu-Ray of “Ghostbusters: Answer The Call” is caught by two pairs of hands behind Brenda, Renee & Olivia. Cut to James as he looks in shock. Cut to Brenda, Renee & Olivia as the camera moves past them to see Eliza Dushku and Traci Hines at the door)

Eliza Dushku:
Heard you were having troubles

Traci Hines:
And it appears we arrived in time to help you out! (Cut to The Wicked entity)

The Wicked:
All Of You will meet your end right here, right now! (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Naturally, You’d think that if I didn’t have a secondary plan, which I’ve been working on since our last encounter! NOW! (James places his right hand over a copy of “Kingsman: The Secret Service”, “Kingsman: The Golden Circle” & “Marvel Studios Doctor Strange”. Cut to Julia Alexa Miller as she touches the screen as “WandaVision” plays on it with her right hand. Cut to Rebecca Yaun as she touches the Wonder Woman Blu-Ray with her right hand. Cut to Paulo, Nick, John, Mike, Andrew & Ed as they place their right hands on the Blu-Rays James gave them. Cut to Brenda, Olivia, Renee, Eliza Dushku & Traci Hines as they place their right on the “Ghostbusters: Answer The Call” Blu-Ray as blinding lights disturb The Wicked Entity. Cut to Rebecca Yaun as she becomes Wonder Woman, Cut to Paulo, Nick, John, Mike, Andrew & Ed as they become “Ghostbusters”. Cut to Brenda, Olivia, Renee, Eliza Dushku & Traci Hines as they become the 2016 Ghostbusters team. Cut to James as he is dressed in a Bespoke suit with Doctor Strange’s Cape and the Eye of Agamotto. Cut to The Blockbuster Buster as he summons Mjölnir and Stormbreaker and Linkara readies his Magic Gun. Cut to Julia Alexa Miller as she becomes The Scarlet Witch as The Wicked attacks, Julia Alexa Miller hits The Wicked with a mix of Scarlet Magicks and her sonic scream, James hits The Wicked with a mix of Doctor Strange’s Magic and Bullets from The Kingsman, The 2016 Ghostbusters team hits The Entity as does The 1984 Ghostbusters,  Chad Narducci grabs a Ghost Trap as Linkara blasts The Wicked Entity with his Magic Gun as The Blockbuster Buster hits it with the combined strength of Mjölnir and Stormbreaker and Rebecca clashes her gauntlets together as the Ghost Trap’s activator slides to James he stomps on it as The Wicked roars and closes containing him in there once and for all as “Word Up” from “Kingsman: The Golden Circle” plays in the foreground. As the music ends, Chad Narducci stands up and sighs.)

Chad Narducci:
Put Alpha Gel on that! Dickhead! (Cut to everyone as they either chuckle incredulously or just smile with a look of “You can not be this serious. Cut to Chad) What? (The Blockbuster Buster walks up to him.)

The Blockbuster Buster:
Dude, We got the reference but no one would make it in this case.

Chad Narducci:
Really? What would you do?

The Blockbuster Buster:
Simple (The Blockbuster Buster pulls out his hammer and obliterates “Wonder Woman 1984” out of James’ hand as he yipes! Cut to The Blockbuster Buster.) BUSTED! (Cut to later as James is talking about the therapist on the same floor as Julia Alexa Miller’s office and Julia Alexa Miller talks to Eliza Dushku & Traci Hines. Cut to the kitchen after all the hoopla has died down and James is talking to James Daniel Walsh on his cell phone.)

TLOTA:
Everyone listen up, The boss is coming to the studio next month for a crossover “Different Cuts” on “Superman: The Movie” so we have to, let me repeat, HAVE TO be on our A-Game! Meaning total professionalism, any opinions, or other thoughts keep them to yourself if he wants to see us do a sketch we give him a sketch. He wants to play golf and have me as his caddy and I have to dress up like a dolphin, I’ll be his dolphin caddy. Alex, if he wants a copy of every last episode of “Life As A Mermaid” available on DVD, make sure he gets it. If he wants John and Mike to dance in the middle of outer space without spacesuits that means I will be seeing your lifeless bodies floating in the stars. So take the next couple of weeks to deal with our new therapist and prepare for anything. Eliza, Traci, You two are always welcomed to come back to the team… (Cut to Eliza & Traci)

Traci Hines:
We know and we appreciate it, congratulations James.

Eliza Dushku:
I agree, I’ve got a family to think of, Thank you though. You’re a lucky man James. (Everyone walks out the door as James heads to the Horseshoe couch as Deliberate Thought by Kevin Macleod then James is joined by Julia Alexa Miller and Chad Narducci.)

Chad Narducci:
James, I…

TLOTA:
Don’t. I think we might not be friends right now but one day… One day. If you want to try, we can rebuild a friendship. For now, we’re going to have to… 

Julia Alexa Miller:
We have to get everything ready for your boss. What about our plans?

TLOTA:
When the time is right?

Chad Narducci:
Oh no, no, you mean that after all that, you two are…

Julia Alexa Miller:
Yep

Chad Narducci:
Still?

TLOTA:
Yep!

Chad Narducci:
I’m opening up the trap and I am… (James, Chad, and Julia Alexa Miller playfully fight as the scene fades to black.)

Connect The Plots: How DC had a shared universe and didn't capitalize on it

(0:36 until the end of the 1994 American Gladiators theme plays as it cuts to James as he morphs into The Last Of The Americans with the half team TLOTA on his right and the other half on his left as the camera pulls back to see the slab with the markings “The Last Of The Americans”. Fade cut to James in his room at his house)

TLOTA:
I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and Yeah still at home, but thankfully I can still "Connect The Plots"!(Cut to a scene of James trying to connect certain things together like the theatrical version of "Halloween: The Curse Of Michael Myers" & "Halloween: H20", All the movie adaptations of Stephen King, Superman Returns to the original Salkind Superman movies, the first three X-Men movies to the newer ones and the "Wolverine" & "Deadpool" movies before cutting to James strapped down in a straight jacket all the while a kid sings "Connect The Plots La-La-La!" before panning down to see anything that might have a minor connection spell the words "Connect The Plots" before cutting to every single movie in the MCU and the recent DC Movies as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):

With Marvel now officially the dominant Comic Book movie production company it seems that DC's movies are on life support and their recent movies haven't helped at all as they've been trying to play "Keeping Up With The Jonses" even though they claim "We're gonna do our own thing" it's clear that they're still fighting Marvel with every tactic they and the corporate execs with the charts, the graphs, the test audience scores they have and it's clear the tactics they have aren't working. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And believe it or not, they had the makings of a DC Movie Shared Universe with two movies that came out back to back! (Show title cards of "Batman Begins" & "Superman Returns", cut to clips of both movies as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
These two like "Iron Man" & The other movies in the First Phase of The MCU could have been the starting point of DC's Connected Movie Universe, instead one went into a different direction and the other went by the wayside. But there is a linking moment that does happen and it happens in Superman Returns. I'll get to it in a moment.(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
For now, let's focus on where they could've started with Batman Begins! (Cut to Title Card of "Batman Begins" then clips of "Batman Begins" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
It is here that this is where their movie universe could've started for all intent and purposes a reboot of "Batman" and it wasn't connected to the Batman 1989 and the movies and guess what they could've done anything to slowly start their connected universe. By having a character make a reference that while Bruce was gone twice as long as that a certain "Big Blue Boy Scout" had been gone. But that is where I would've made the reference and guess what then build and make the Batman up for the rest of the movie. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And here is where it goes in with Superman Returns and for those of you who have seen it, I will be talking about one scene in particular. (Cut to "Superman Returns" as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
In the scene after Lex takes the Kryptonite at the Daily Planet people are excited at Superman's return and at one point Gotham is mentioned though briefly. No mention of Bruce Wayne or Batman which is a mistake in my opinion. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And also what was a mistake was releasing Superman Returns right after "Batman Begins", I have my reasons! Let me explain! (Cut to stills of other DC properties that got a movie before the DCEU and characters that should've gotten a movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
To me they should've built up other heroes like Wonder Woman before the DCEU, Heroes like Green Lantern without having Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively in the role. Okay granted I wouldn't have casted Jack Black in there but still it would've been a good idea to have some unknown in terms of real acting like Mike "The Miz" Mizanin. An Aquaman movie which would been like the first Thor Movie but wouldn't have an exact duplicate of the first Thor movie, I would've also hired Joshua Jackson from "The Mighty Ducks" and "Dawson's Creek" as Barry Allen AKA The Flash and in his movie I would've gone through his origin and all that did happen in the first season of what would be the first season of The Flash series with Grant Gustin on the CW save for the season finale, then released "Superman Returns" and have Kevin Spacey's Lex Luthor be rescued by the villain of the "Aquaman" and build to a Justice League movie that wasn't a complete and total clusterbank to sit through. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
However that never happened as "The Dark Knight" came out that killed any future DC Movies until the finale of The Christopher Nolan "Batman" movie series happened and we all know what happened afterwards with both DC and Marvel Movies. DC went downwards and Marvel went up until... (Show poster of "Avengers: Endgame" and the fact it bears on it "The No. 1 Highest Grossing Movie Ever!" Cut to James physically.)

TLOTA:
Do I hope DC can truly capitalize on a Shared Movie Universe. Well if the stories of "Flashpoint" being the reboot so the DCEU can wipe out a lot of the crap that happened with the exception being that of the Wonder Woman movie, maybe, Just maybe DC can get back in the race. But for now... (Cut to clips of "Batman Begins" & "Superman Returns" as James does a brief voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
I can say I enjoyed these movies for what they are and what they could've started if DC had pulled the trigger. If you think that there is some validity to what I'm talking about, check them out and see what should've been the start of the real DCEU! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to set up a palate cleanser list of tv series and movies to watch after what I have to deal with next month! I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and that's my opinion!

Five Years & "Justice" for very little

(A Hand pulling a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the Robo Knight Robo Morpher and punching in the code 428 then cut to James jumping down a cliff from the 0:00-0:03 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:04 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows James Faraci landing and fully morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans basic mode with his Long sleeve Tee-Shirt with the American flag design on it, Blue cargo Jeans and Black Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James fighting alongside the 2017 Power Rangers Movie Power Rangers at the 0:13 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:14-0:17 show Rebecca Yaun as Wonder Woman  and Nick Yaun as Steve Trevor charging the screen before cutting to John and Mike Santos peeling out in The DeLorean From “Back To The Future” before cutting to the 0:17-0:19 mark as it shows Paulo & Brenda Fonseca taking a joyride in KITT from “Knight Rider” in Super Pursuit Mode before cutting to the 0:20-0:28 mark as we see Eric Kurtzke, Ed Champion and Andrew Beach flying the USS Enterprise from “Star Trek” (2009) and Olivia Horvath flying The Orville as it cuts to the 0:28 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows when James stands on top of his Time and Space device and tosses his sonic screwdriver then cuts over to multiple clips from the past five years of “The Last Of The Americans” reviews as the Sonic Screwdriver flips end over end as the 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run plays when James grabs it while on top of a slab while doing a heroic pose with Paulo & Brenda Fonseca, John & Mike Santos, Eric Kurtzke, Olivia Horvath on his right and Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Renee Miller, Andrew Beach & Ed Champion on his left doing their own heroic poses on a black background the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera pulls back to see James and everyone else on top of a slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James and Julia Alexa Miller looking like disheveled as they walk down the backside of the Neversink Reservoir as James carries a very beaten and bruised Deadpool wisecracking and breaking the fourth wall while being hauled in a Grocery Cart and a piano playing “Free Bird” is in the foreground.)

TLOTA (Narrating):
You might be wondering why we look like we went the distance and LOST! You’re probably wondering why Deadpool is the way he is in the Grocery Cart.

Deadpool (Played by Cambell Dodson):
We got our asses WHOOPED like a bunch of school kids and Yes James is pissing himself on the road!

TLOTA (Narrating):
Deadpool shut up!

Deadpool:
Okay

TLOTA (Narrating):
I guess it started back when Myspace was a social site and I’d just blog willy nilly about anything I had on my mind. Then I ended one blog calling myself The Last Of The Americans and then came Kickassia, the first movie I’d ever review! Eventually deciding to turn myself into an Internet Reviewer after being inspired by those on a site that is now a gigantic toilet bowl called Channel Awesome (James spits in the narration as he does in the real time)! Last year I got picked up by Manic-Expression.com to all of whom I am still grateful! Then a few hours ago I celebrated my fifth anniversary by having to review a movie I’d never thought would get to see the light of day. Let’s go back a few hours! (Cut to James in his office as he stands and does the diamond cutter sign)

TLOTA:
I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views I’m about to express are that of my own and have been some of yours for the past FIVE YEARS RUNNING! BANG!  (Cut to a moment of Fireworks and Ode To Joy playing as an image of DDP as his face is in the background and does the sign of the Diamond Cutter sign before cutting to James physically doing the same position) BANG! WHOO! Now what after all that I’ve seen and what I’ve been through, what could possibly top my “Avengers: Infinity War” review? How can I surprise everyone? By going from one big Comic Book Movie Clusterbank to an even BIGGER Comic Book Movie Clusterbank! (Cut to opening credit of “Justice League” as the Opening Music to “Justice League Unlimited” plays in the foreground of the clips of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):“Justice League” is possibly one of the most incredibly good yet the most incredibly awful movies I’ve ever seen! I don’t know who is to blame the fans for not giving this movie a chance or DC Entertainment, Geoff Johns, Zack Snyder, Joss Whedon, Chris Terrio and Time Warner for just doing too much that it’d drive fans away after hitting No. 1 opening weekend worst than “Batman V Superman: Dawn & Justice”, “Suicide Squad” & “Batman & Robin”! But with this being DC’s attempt to get back into the fight against Marvel they should’ve thrown EVERY LITTLE BIT OF EFFORT INTO THIS MOVIE. BUT IT FELT SO HALF-ASSED EVEN HALF ASSED BAD MOVIES ARE LAUGHING AT THE LACK OF EFFORT IN THIS MOVIE! Now I know what you’re thinking didn’t “Wonder Woman” revive your faith in the DCEU? Shouldn’t you try to be a little more lenient towards this movie? Can’t you give this movie the smallest benefit of the doubt? (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA:
Well, even the worst intentions can make someone forget after doing such a good job besides with what Warner Brothers and DC did made me forget the little bit of good and let’s face it they did their best to ruin the little bit of good with this movie. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and THIS IS “JUSTICE LEAGUE”! (Cut to the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
So our movie starts as Superman played once again by Henry Cavill is being interviewed by podcasters. Oh, fun factoid They digitally deleted Henry’s Moustache which he refused to shave because he was in the middle of shooting the latest “Mission: Impossible” movie. Here’s an idea, instead of digitally removing it have the man marbles to stand up TO the Man Of Steel and say to him SHAVE THE STACHE! We then cut to sometime later in Gotham City as Batman played again by Ben Affleck is dangling a crook like a worm on a hook for parademon bait! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:Just like how a certain group of people think Batman would do to criminal scum! I WONDER WHO IT COULD BE?! (Cut back to the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Rather being dead than turn on his master, the parademon blows himself up. Back in the batcave Alfred played by Jeremy Irons preps Batman’s Jet and says the old standby (Cut to a clip of Phelous as he says, “It’s Time!” before cutting back to the movie as James does a voiceover.) Meanwhile we see clips of Superman’s funeral and the people who everyone thinks are stupid, you know the guys who think 2+2=4 are grieving meanwhile the 1% of people on this rock who think 2+2= IFLYDACHOOCHOOTRAIN are glad Superman died and the Trolls who hate Superman because he’s nothing like the cold-blooded Batman are probably still like this…! (Cut to a group of Trolls performed by members of Team TLOTA as they Conga sing & Conga Line dance “Superman is De-ead! He’s getting butt-raped by Sa-Tan!” five times before cutting back to the movie as James does a voiceover.) We soon find ourselves in Paris as Wonder Woman once again played by Gal Gadot stops a group of French Terrorists. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Never thought I say this but I am missing the insanity of “Fishtales” after saying that! (Cut back to the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
In the meanwhile Bruce tries to find Arthur Curry aka Aquaman played by Jason Momoa to join him. Aquaman bluntly tells Bruce to shove his offer up his Bat-Hole! As Bruce and Alfred try to discover the mystery of the Mother Boxes mentioned in Lex Luthor’s notes. Alfred finds Barry Allen aka Flash and sadly it’s not Grant Gustin. But rather Ezra Miller and sadly the best description I can give of Ezra’s Barry Allen makes me say the following, I would rather have seen anyone else as The Flash than this twerp. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
As a matter of fact! Here’s my list of ten actors who’d make a better Flash! (Cut to photos of Michael Cera, Jay Baruchel, Jeremy Jordan, Zac Efron, Dave Franco, Nick Slimmer, Cambell Dodson, Doug Yaun, Andrew Garfield and Shia LaBeouf as the first twenty-seven seconds of “Frolic” by Luciano Michelini plays before cutting to James physically as James’ cell phone goes off) Hello! (Cut to Hell looking like a frozen rock cave as Satan is bundled up in Winter gear)

Satan (played by Paulo Fonseca):
Something you did cause it to freeze down here and the pilot light is going to take forever for me to light! So, what did you do? (Cut to James) 

TLOTA:I put Shia LaBeouf onto a list of actors who I wanted to be The Flash in the DCEU Movies! (Cut to Hell looking like a frozen rock cave as Satan is bundled up in Winter gear)

Satan (played by Paulo Fonseca):
JESUS CHRIST! YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO SEE SHIA LABEOUF IN A MOVIE?! No wonder the flames went out down here and the Third Reich are taking on the Liberals in a game of ice hockey on the River Styx oh what a check shot. The Hanson Brothers from “Slap Shot” would be proud of that! Gotta go, Hockey Brawl! (Cut back to the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
As Barry makes his usual trip to see his father Henry Allen played by Billy Crudup. Henry tells Barry to let him go. Meanwhile we’re introduced to Victor Stone AKA Cyborg played by Ray Fisher who is in hiding after what happened to make him the Cyborg. However back on Themyscira, Queen Hippolyta rides to find the mother box has awoken and Steppenwolf has come, and this is where Pants Should be darkening but when Decay from freaking “Ghost Rider: Spirit Of Vengeance” is more intimidating this is a level of fail that is in the same realm as Waterworld! But the Amazons get their Mother Box taken by Steppenwolf in an impressive action scene. Hippolyta decides to light the warning fire to get Diana into the fracas. Which she sees and then we cut to Lois Lane played again by Amy Adams who is as she was in “Batman v Superman” pretty much a worthless piece of existence as she is doing fluff pieces and (Doing a Ben Affleck “Batman” growling voice) MARTHA (Back to normal) played by Diane Lane as we discover she’s lost the farm and is living in a small apartment doing… I HAVE NO FRIGGIN’ CLUE! Meanwhile Cyborg finds the files about him found by Alfred and Bruce. Speaking of Bruce, he works on finding the frequency to harm Parademons, gets a visit by Diana and is told about Steppenwolf and the Mother Boxes and how the Atlanteans, Green Lanterns and other alien forces like Martians and Kryptonians, tribes of men, even the Greek Pantheon of Gods stop Steppenwolf and send him back separating the Mother Boxes. One entrusted by The Atlanteans who decided to sink their city to protect it, One to The Amazons who hid it on Themyscira, three were given to the Elves; immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings, seven, to the Dwarf Lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls. And nine were gifted to the race of Men (A record scratch is heard before the movie cuts away to James physically)

TLOTA:
Eh, Whoops! I guess I’ve got Lord Of The Rings on the mind. We’ll be right back! (Fade to black before cutting to the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera pulls back to see James and everyone else on top of a slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before fading to black then cutting back to the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera pulls back to see James and everyone else on top of a slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Realizing they have Days until Steppenwolf wipes the planet of all life quicker than that smelthead Barnacle King and his plans to destroy all life on this planet. The time has come to induct Barry and Cyborg into their League… (Show entire moment between Barry and Bruce as Barry asks what Bruce’s Superpower is and Bruce says he’s rich before cutting to James physically as he nurses a headache with Aspirin and Martinelli’s) 

TLOTA:
Bruce’s superpower is that he is rich. Not that he can be a better detective than Sherlock Holmes, not the fact he can have some deca-quadrillion contingencies to his deca-quadrillion contingency plans. It’s just that he’s rich! This feels like such bad writing even Zack Snyder, Joss Whedon and Chris Terrio wouldn’t approve of it unless OH MY GOD! ORAC, where are they?

ORAC (Audio only):
In the main lobby! (Dramatic music plays as James walks out of his office and through the secondary entrance to the main lobby before cutting to the group of Chart & Memo loving execs and their Lindsay Nagel leader played by Olivia Horvath in the main lobby standing united before cutting back to James.)

TLOTA:
YOU! (Cut to the C&M Execs)

L.N. Exec:
I see you found enjoyment in our memo forced rewrite. Originally Bruce was going to say something along the lines of him being an expert fighter and criminal investigator, but we realized he was Donald Trump I mean Lex Luthor sans the need to take over the world, so we realized his superpower was his money! (Cut to James.)

TLOTA:
Good Freaking Grief! I don’t have time to argue and deal with you just say whatever you want because you live in your own reality where Fluffy Happy Clouds and Flying Marshmallow pies are reality! (Cut to the C&M Execs)

L.N. Exec:
Well someone needs one of our memo enhanced moments! (Cut to the movie as the L.N. Exec does a voiceover)

L.N. Exec (Voiceover):
Like how Aquaman finally gets involved. By rescuing the sailor, it forces him back to Atlantis and thus putting into motion his character arc! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
AH! The key word “FORCE” that is what is wrong with the DCEU you are FORCING everything down people’s throats and forcing everything down the bad aftertaste in people’s mouth lasts a long, long, long time. The few times I watch women’s wrestling I still have a backwash of Eva Marie! Though the moment you described could’ve been nicer if Mera played by Amber Herd and Aquaman sounded more like normal humans. (Show clip between Mera and Aquaman before cutting to James physically.)

TLOTA:
WOULD IT HAVE KILLED EITHER ONE TO PUT EMOTION INTO THEIR CONVERSATION?! Well emotion that isn’t forced? (Cut to the movie as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
After obtaining the second box and setting up a base in Pozharnov in a Russian Nuclear Reactor because THAT’S AS SUBTLE AS AN M. NIGHT SHAYMALAN PLOT TWIST! A parademon kidnaps Victor’s father played by Joe Morton which gets Commissioner Gordon played by J.K. Simmons to summon Batman, Cyborg, The Flash and Wonder Woman to face the Parademons and Steppenwolf on Braxton island, the mid-point between Gotham and Metropolis! Just as the four are about to open a can of Whoop-Ass! Barry has a full on out Spaz attack! While the others fight The Flash gets the others to safety he finally does something of use by helping Wonder Woman regain her sword and get her away from the nightcrawler with “HILARITY” and when I mean “HILARITY” I mean such forced humor I felt like I was watching the latest outing of Happy Madison! Aquaman joins the fight after Cyborg nearly drowns the whole team and destroys ancient water ways! SMOOTH FRICKING MOVE EX-LAX! After such a full on out ass whipping, what’s the next move for our heroes? Have the Annoying Comic relief and Cyborg rob Superman’s grave, use Cyborg’s Mother Box and enough energy from the comic relief’s speed to revive one VERY, VERY PISSED OFF SUPERMAN! (Show clip of Superman attacking everyone and making Batman look like an idiot after Lois calms down Superman and the two fly off before cutting to James physically)

TLOTA:Okay, which of you ASSHOLE ROCKET SKYENTISTS THOUGHT THAT WAS A SMARTY SMART WAY TO REINTRODUCE KAL-EL THE LAST SON OF KRYPTON?! (Cut to Half of the C&M Execs as the other half after being given the look to them by the Lindsay Nagel Head exec forces the other half to raise their hands before cutting to James as he buries his head in the couch and screams before cutting back to the movie.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
After that moment, Steppenwolf grabs the last Mother Box, our team decide to go after Steppenwolf all the while Superman and Lois basically let each other know how much they’ve become soft or how they left each other hurt and now it’s up to both to make it right in their own way. Meanwhile Steppenwolf combine the three Mother Boxes which sends the signal where he is and our team decide they’re damned if they can do it with Superman and damned if they can’t do it with Superman and make their way to face him once and for all. (Show moment in which Aquaman talks honestly about the chances and himself and everything he wants to do until he realizes he’s sitting on the Lasso Of Truth before a muted Waa-Waa trumpet is heard and cut to James as he shrugs humorously before cutting to the movie and James does a voiceover) They make it to Pozharnov and Batman decides he’s going on the suicide run to take down the tower and knock down the shield dome as the others have the easy job of stopping Steppenwolf! Simple as PIE! Now I will give the movie this, the action is AWESOME! A lot of the fights are amazing, and it is possibly the best parts of the movie. But I digress the team makes it to Steppenwolf’s lair and as each one of them gets their backsides handed to them guess who comes to save their backsides while The Flash gets everyone out of the way. (Superman comes in to face Steppenwolf before cutting to James physically.)

TLOTA:
And here is where things become for a lack of a better term Cartoonish and not in a good way! (Cut to the final fight and actions as well as the rest of the movie as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
The action between Steppenwolf and the Justice League is something SO incredibly cartoonish the only thing is missing is the comic effects and I don’t mean a ton of Onamonapias. I mean the type of effects that are so ridiculous that even awful cartoons on the Cartoon Network nowadays are ashamed to have them in it. But I digress, our heroes Separate the Mother Boxes, Stop Steppenwolf, Bruce basically saves the farm, everyone goes back to their old lives and the movie ends with a race between the Flash and Superman and “Lex Luthor” getting the Legion Of Doom together for the movie after they take down Darkseid in the next movie in post credit scenes because for them to take on an in-between battle before taking on Darkseid would be a Stupid move, You know a Marvel move! (Cut to the group of the C&M execs)

L.N. Exec:
That is a great idea, The Main event in the next Justice League! Thank you for setting up the next great DCEU movie (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
You idiots think that after sitting through this, I want to inspire the even more lackluster sequel? You believed I enjoyed this movie? (James walks over to the C&M execs bullhorn in hand) OF COURSE I DIDN’T LIKE THIS MOVIE! THIS MOVIE SUCKED!

(Cut to clips of “Justice League” as the Opening Music to “Justice League Unlimited” plays in the foreground as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
This is the Bizzaro version of “Marvel’s The Avengers” every wrong decision “Avengers” didn’t do, This movie did! The Comedy was forced, most of the line delivery was so freaking stilted I’m surprised Tommy Wiseau didn’t help as an acting coach, most of what we wanted we didn’t get and what we got we didn’t like. What there is to like is very little, the acting for the most part, some of the writing, the way the team comes together without the team being forced into this by a cabal of a Government Agency but with the very little good that they did is instantly erased with five megatons of crap! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And anything you worthless lumps of space and time did added nothing but… (A loud and annoying voice saying “YOU STOP BEING A BULLY! YOU BULLY!” before cutting to a big head popping out of the crowd to reveal Cool Cat)

Cool Cat (Played in Suit by Steve Kidd but voiced by James Faraci):
Anytime you say something that is different and act the way you do, you are a bully. You and your friends Nostalgia Kid, I Hate Everything all of you are bullies even those who dislike Cool Cat and the messages I convey… (A female voice in the ether shouts “OH SHUT UP!” before cutting to the door behind James as Julia Alexa Miller and Deadpool played by Cambell Dodson walk to James)

Julia Alexa Miller:
I’ve seen your drivel and I found my intelligence being insulted with every second I watched! (Cut to Cool Cat)

Cool Cat:
What do you know? You’re being influenced by that bully! You can do better than being forced into doing his biding! (Cut to Julia, James and Deadpool)

Julia Alexa Miller:
I’m not influenced by him. (Julia Alexa Miller kisses on James’ lips)

Deadpool:
That’s Amore! And now comes the part when we go hacky slashy on some corporate ass and Cool Cat becomes Pussy Chimichangas! (James and Julia’s kiss ends as the version of Freebird used in “The Kingsmen: Secret Service” is played as James, Julia and Deadpool run in slow motion towards the camera before the camera pans to Cool Cat as he sees the three spear him before a brawl erupts in the Parking Lot outside of James’ studio as James fights the Male execs, Julia Alexa Miller fights the Female Execs and Deadpool gets the left overs from both groups in a single take fight sequence similar to “The Kingsmen: Secret Service” as James is thrown into a van and the camera holds onto the van as James and those inside talk we see an C&M Exec, Julia Alexa Miller, Deadpool and Cool Cat landing on the van)

TLOTA (Audio only):
Where have you guys been?

Paulo Fonseca (Audio only):
Getting reinforcements!

Rebecca Yaun (Audio only):
We saw this coming a mile away and knew who to contact!

TLOTA (Audio only):
Well don’t just sit there get into the fight! (James steps out of the van, Superman punches “Cool Cat” as Keith Inman, Jamietud, The Nostalgia Kid, Antoni Matei Garcia, The Last Angry Geek, Kirakennedy, Mike J, Keith Inman and James Walsh, Paulo Fonseca, Brenda Fonseca, John & Mike Santos, Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Renee Miller, Andrew Beach, Ed Champion, Olivia Horvath come running out of the van as Rowdy steps out of the van Cool Cat lands on the van again)

Cool Cat:
OH NO! ANOTHER BULLY!

Rowdy:
I’m not a bully, I’m an Internet Reviewer! NINJA CATS! STRIKE! (The Ninja cats attack Cool Cat as the single take battle continues as the fight gets out of hand eventually ending with and James fireman carries Cool Cat on top of the execs as they’re being shoved into a Dumpster as Deadpool tosses in a bundle of Dynamite into the dumpster and sits on top of it!)

Deadpool:
And BOOM goes the Dynamite! (The dumpster goes up as does Deadpool and as Deadpool goes up he looks at the audience)

Deadpool:
Before I land in the Shopping Cart, I just wanted to congratulate James Faraci The Last Of The Americans for busting his dick for five years straight to make such unbelievable entertainment. And by unbelievable entertainment, I can’t believe it’s real entertainment! But he’s doing incredible voodoo that he can do! So, make sure you celebrate his work and think about what he’s done and what he’ll continue to do as long as he can! Now if you’ll excuse me! (Deadpool shouts WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! As he goes hurdling down to the parking lot landing in the Shopping Cart as everyone is exhausted)

TLOTA (Exhausted):
Hey thanks you guys for helping me out! How about after we finish the clean up and celebration and clean up after that I schlep myself, Alex and Deadpool to the Hospital (Cut to everyone exhaustedly cheering before cutting to KiraKennedy)

KiraKennedy:
I brought cake! (Cut to Mike J)

Mike J:
Awesome, I hope it’s Carrot Cake. (Cut to Jamietud)

Jamietud:
I brought the drinks! (Cut to The Nostalgia Kid)

The Nostalgia Kid:
Good! (Cut to Ed Champion)

Ed Champion:
Happy Fifth Anniversary, did anyone bother to set up! (Cut to James Faraci)

TLOTA:
Already done Ed! (Cut to James Walsh)

James Walsh:
You constantly keep going, so glad you are part of the site.  (Cut to James Faraci)

TLOTA:
James, I’m just a tiny cog in the big clock of Manic-Expression.com (Cut to Paulo & Brenda Fonseca)

Paulo Fonseca:
James, we’ll clean up, you take Deadpool and Alex to the Hospital and we’ll clean up!

Brenda Fonseca:
Don’t argue and we’ll see you soon! (Cut to John & Mike Santos)

John Santos:
Doesn’t Deadpool have like regenerative powers?

Mike Santos:
I think so. (Cut to Olivia Horvath)

Olivia Horvath:
James, Go, you’ve earned the break! Let us finish setting up the Anniversary Party! (Cut to everyone as they say to James in one way or another “Leave” or “Go to the Hospital” before cutting to James, Alex and Deadpool)

TLOTA:
ALRIGHT! You don’t have to twist my arm. Can I say something to the audience? (The others all say “Yeah” in one way or another.) Thank you. You know I started Internet Reviewing to talk about the subjects I liked and to tear the ones I didn’t like. Then I found myself meeting so many people. I met Rowdy, I met The Nostalgia Kid, I met so many former Channel Awesome producers, James Walsh the man who gave me a break when Rowdy justifiably refocused his site to his projects and gave me a home at Manic-Expression.com and I am grateful that he has helped keep me going. I am grateful to Rowdy who gave me the first break in my career and most importantly of all, I am grateful to You! My Audience who keep checking this 36-year-old Internet Reviewer who works constantly on making everyone just get a good laugh from his views on movies and all things happening in the pop culture landscape and let him know, He’s not that bad a guy! Thank You all for keeping me going and I’ll keep on going Lord Willing and The Crick Don’t Rise for as Long as I humanly can. I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and thank you for allowing me to express my opinion. (James holds the cart and carries Alex and they walk away before fading to black then fading back to after the celebration as James and Alex do a cleanup!)

TLOTA:
You know Alex, you didn’t have to stay behind. (Cut to Julia Alexa Miller as she takes out the recycling bins)

Julia Alexa Miller:
I didn’t want to see you get stuck with a huge clean up at the end of the day! (Cut to James as he puts the vacuum cleaner away)

TLOTA:
I do it everyday at the end of the day. Even when I have a full schedule!

Julia Alexa Miller (Audio only):
You put too much on yourself. Hey James, I never got a chance to see the inside of your personal office. What’s this? (James has the look of someone who just pooped himself as he tries to run to stop her from reading the letter and James gets to his office as it is too late and the words on the letter glow and encompass her as a bright light shines and raises up then returns to the letter forcing Julia Alexa Miller back down to the floor and James grabs her before she lands on the floor and James tries to wake her up as a blast of energy exudes from Julia Alexa Miller’s eyes and mouth slamming James into the wall and the letter landing on him with the glass shattering on his head and James passes out then cutting to James on the couch waking up and the word screaming out of his mouth is “ALEX!” before James looks around and sees Olivia Horvath, Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Paulo & Brenda Fonseca, Andrew Beach, Ed Champion, John & Mike Santos, Renee Miller and Eric Kurtzke are cleaning him up with Olivia cleaning James’ face.)

TLOTA:
Guys, Alex was here, she read the letter, where is it? (Cut to everyone looking nervous hoping not to either scare or piss off James before John hands James The Letter and sees it has been restored to normal.) How did I wind up on the couch?

Paulo Fonseca:
Steve found you. 

Nick Yaun:
That was after Steve had a run in with Alex after being dropped off. (Flashback effect and music plays as Julia Alexa Miller runs out afraid of what she has done and Steve Kidd bump into each other in the parking lot outside of James’ Studio.)

Steve Kidd:
Sorry, hey I recognize you. The Christmas Party! Steve Kidd and you are?

Julia Alexa Miller:
I… don’t…know. I JUST DON’T KNOW! (The shouting of the word “know” sends Steve flying and landing into the trash dumpster outside of James’ Studio before Julia Alexa Miller runs off in fear and the sound of tires screeching away before seeing Steve Kidd pull himself out of the Dumpster and shouts “OH MY GOD!” before Flashforward effect and music plays as it cuts to everyone on the couch.)

John Ross Santos:
Next thing he did was call us and we got you taken care of. Martinelli’s?

TLOTA:
Please.

Mike Santos:
And he left a message for us.

Andrew Beach:
Play it Ed.

(Ed Champion turns on the TV as it cuts to the screen on James’ TV)

Steve Kidd:
Hey James, by the time you see this, I’m going to be finding that girl for you. I have no idea where she might be or where I’m going but trust me I’ve known you long enough to know when you’re miserable. When I last saw her, she was heading west. I’m heading out that way, wish me the best of luck! If it works, you’ll be thanking me by the end of the year… I hope! (The message ends as it cuts to James and everyone else.)

TLOTA:
Well I wish him the best of luck heading out west…. Out…. WEST!?! OH, GOOD FREAKING GOD! (James hobbles as he tries and gets to his personal office and everyone follows him as 0:42-2:14 “New Glory” from Royalty Free Kings plays in the foreground.) ORAC! Send an e-mail to Alex! (James hobbles to his computer and shouts DAMN IT! As everyone else comes running after him.)

Renee Miller:
What’s wrong? (Cut to James as he gets to his seat and tries to make a call)

TLOTA:
I’ve got to stop him! (Cut to everyone else)

Team TLOTA (In Unison):
Who? (Cut to James on the phone)

TLOTA:
STEVE! (Cut to Steve Kidd on the bus)

Steve Kidd:
Hey James, don’t worry about a thing by this time next year you and that girl… (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Julia Alexa Miller (Cut to Steve)

Steve Kidd:
That’s her name? Anyway, I am going to fix this mess. (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
Steve there is no mess, right now she’s in Malibu California shooting photographs, filming “Life As A Mermaid” and working on producing “WitchHaven” leave her be. (Cut to Steve)

Steve Kidd:
Well, now I have a name a city and state, I’ll be letting you know how things go on my travels. Peace Out James! (Steve hangs up then the scene cuts to James shouts an even louder “DAMN IT!” before cutting to team TLOTA)

Rebecca Yaun:
James, do you mind telling us what’s going on? (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
It’s Emmalina, it’s Alex, it’s everything now out of control! (Cut to team TLOTA)

Ed Champion:
Well, things can’t be that bad if it’s about an ex and someone who is now… Oh… OH…. OHHHHH! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
Exactly Ed, Steve is about to make an impossible moment happen by turning a molehill into a mountain and I need to warn her. (Cut to everyone else)

Olivia Horvath:
James, why are you trying to warn her, it’s not like Steve know everything about what’s going on! (Cut to James)

TLOTA:
But I’ve known him for a long time, he means well but usually if things can go wrong, WILL go wrong and Steve as well meaning as he is will be the accidental cause! I HAVE TO WARN HER AND THEM! (James tries to call and getting Alex’s phone’s Answering Machine as James tosses the phone back on the receiver and cutting to black)

The Top 10 TLOTA Moments of 2017

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James physically in his office)

TLOTA:

I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and The views I'm about to express are that of my own and some of yours. Phew, 2017 a year that defies descriptive words! (Cut to certain clips from different reviews as James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voiceover):
Having moved away from Rowdyc.com to Manic-Expression.com was a good move on my part. Not that I'm ungrateful to those from Rowdyc.com, they gave me my first big break. I did an entire Summer Retrospective Series. I made some pretty good reviews and I thank everyone at Manic-Expression for welcoming me and my reviews with open arms. I've made some new friends and I've got to take them to a con however the trip nearly ended in disaster. We've been afraid that any second North Korea would wipe us off the face of the earth. We've seen mighty names fall from grace. But through it all we survived this...year! And for me that's a miracle in itself! (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:
And to celebrate that miracle... (James pulls out his morpher and reverts back to being James Faraci)

James Faraci:
Let's remember the good that happened by counting down five of your favorites and five of mine with The Top Ten Moments of 2017 from James Faraci The Last Of The Americans.

(A Hand pulling a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the Robo Knight Robo Morpher and punching in the code 428 from the 0:00-0:03 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:04 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows James Faraci morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans with his Long sleeve Tee-Shirt with the American flag design on it, Blue cargo Jeans and Tan Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James stocking up on his arsenal from the Classic Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Morpher, a bandoleer stocked up with Sonic Screwdrivers, Ammunition for a 303 British Rifle and said rifle, The Ring Of Aeon, The Gem From the Gauntlet Malachite’s Hand, Emmalina’s amulet and the Sword Of Caliverti from 0:08-0:15 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators. 0:15-0:29 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run shows James leaping and running through moments from the 2016 calendar year of his reviews ranging from James morphing into his new suit for the first time, James getting slapped by Paulo, Mr. B Natural pop jump cutting into frame as James grabs Rowdy & The Nostalgia Kid as they scream in terror, Traci Hines shooting the Double Barreled handgun, Everyone trying to stop Eliza Dushku from using her switchblade knife on an unconscious Spoony,  James blast jumps and Eliza rolls out of the way as an electrical pulse knocks out everyone else before cutting to the clip of The Moviebusters pulling out their Proton Pack blasters until the 0:30 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows the team line-up of the majority of 2015 walking towards the screen as the camera rises over to see the American Flag and James’ signal in the sky as before cutting to James as he jumps and pulls out a sonic screwdriver before cutting over to a slab of titanium where lasers cut out “The Last Of The Americans” until 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run when James lands on top of the slab while doing a heroic pose with Paulo & Brenda Fonseca, Andrew Beach, John Santos & Eric Kurtzke on his right and Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Ed Champion, Olivia Horvath, Renee Miller and Mike Santos on his left doing their own heroic poses on a black background the 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it with the words "The Top ten moments" and underneath "The Last Of The Americans" is "Of  2017" then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number ten

10) The Ass Kicking of Michael Myers in The Different Cuts of Halloween 6

James Faraci (Voiceover):
After watching both cuts of the worst movie in the Halloween Movie Franchise I honestly lost my cookies after hearing the twist in the Producers Cut and as an uncle to three nieces. Twins just about Jaime's age I really thought the only true thing to do to Michael was to let him have it with both barrels. It was so Cathartic to just beat Michael Myers into a bloody pile. Interesting fact while I was watching and writing this Paulo, Brenda and I were coming up on how to handle it. I was the most vocal on something really brutal. Brenda thought of me kicking his ass until he was dead for good but Paulo said that happened before in the movies and he walked away unscathed. That was when I thought of dropkicking him ass first into an industrial wood chipper. That was when I realized we had the right ending for the Different Cuts of Halloween 6: The Curse Of Michael Myers (Cut to an overhead shot of James as he walks away and the camera pulls back to show that blood spatter that was Michael Myers show the sign of the thorn as the audio of the creepy little girl singing “It’s Raining Red” echoes in the background as she sings “It’s Raining Red” echoing even further as it fades to black before cutting to 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voice over): Number nine

9) The 3 Tails: A Mermaid Adventure review.

James Faraci (Voiceover):
I felt someone had to be honest but not hurtful when it came to reviewing this thing and I felt I had to be the one to review this but that may be me having seen this movie and not gone Cuckoo thus making me qualified to do so. The best parts were when I stepped away from the review to give a shoutout to Julia Alexa Miller and the series she works on "Life As A Mermaid" and the Bryan Mills moment. (Show clip of James as Bryan Mills and Spoony as Dr. Insano before cutting to the rest of the review as James does a voiceover) And believe it or not, back in November of Last year Me and Noah Antwiler AKA Spoony saw this and came up with the Dr. Insano/Bryan Mills interaction while we were working on the Highlander II Different Cuts. But yeah a really great episode and I truly hold NO ill will towards the movie, the web series it's based on and the people who worked on that. You put in a lot of effort and I applaud you for it. But sadly the movie did stink. I truly hope you forgive me for my review.

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voice over): Number eight

8) The Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory crossover with Steve Kidd

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Originally I was going to handle this one solo. But Steve wanted to do a review with me. So I decided "Okay, I'll let him help out on this" and I'm glad I did because had I done this on my own I probably wouldn't have had as good a time making this review. Letting Steve go off the rails was possibly the best part because as it was last year when I did the Jem Review the movie wasn't the focus of the review. It was me, Steve and the entire team giving the middle finger to what is truly wrong with not only Hollywood but also whose trying to run it and run us out of business! (Show ending musical number as James continues his voiceover)While Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory is pure garbage. This review being one of the best by both you guys and me is one reason I keep this up. (Show ending as James sings his lines before fading to black)

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number Seven

7) Just Add Water: My Mako Adventure

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Possibly the hardest work I've done and yet the most rewarding of payoffs. I started preproduction in November of Last year and by September of this year I had gotten through the entire franchise. Am I still hot under the collar that Evie's Screwjob will never be rectified? Yes. Do I wish that Season 3 of Mako Mermaids was better written and paced? HELL YES! Do I hope for either another season or the rumored movie to rectify Season 3? OH GOD I HOPE SO! But the fact that there has been no negative reaction from fans of both H2O & Mako makes me glad that I did the Summer Retrospective. Do I hope I get a chance to do another summer retrospective? Well it depends the subject for the Retrospective.

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number six

6) The Top Ten Unexpectedly Bad Ass Characters

James Faraci (Voiceover):

This was one of my best countdowns because I wanted to give the characters that were seen as second fiddles or less than amazing and let everyone know that they're as bad ass as the heroes who are the main focus. As a matter of fact, when I posted the link to Manic-Expression.com. Les from Manic Expression gave me a bad ass that I missed (Cut to "The Lord Of The Rings as James does a voiceover) Samwise Gamgee and as Les said about the unexpected bad ass Sam is " A shy and delicate Hobbit, Sam starts out the epic series as a gardener who pines after the local barmaid, Rosie(Sarah McLeod) but never asks her out. Sent on a quest to protect ring bearer Frodo Baggins(Elijah Wood) from orcs, monsters, Gollum(Andy Serkis) and one really big spider, Sam shows his mettle and becomes courageous and fiery. Upon returning to the Shire, he goes straight to Rosie and in the next scene is marrying her." Good enough point for Sam to get to the 1.5 spot on the list and Samwise the Brave is worth it. (Cut to Sam saying to himself "Samwise The Brave" before cutting to 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number five

5) The 2017 Power Rangers Movie Review

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Got to admit this was the quickest turn around from watching a movie to reviewing it. Quicker than the 2016 Ghostbusters movie. Though this review had a lot to do. It had to end Eliza Dushku and Traci Hines' brief tenure with us, introduce Brenda who is Paulo's Wife, Andrew Beach and Ed Champion quickly, reenact the movie while I review it and try to be fun. Working on it was anything BUT fun I had problems up the Wazoo. Believe it or not Eliza and Traci was nearly IN the review as Eliza was originally cast as Kimberly and Traci was Rita Repulsa. But I felt I had done enough to them in a year and a half. While they left on good terms and said they would make guest appearances now and then it was sad they left. Even harder was having to cut the original ending. Originally having had enough of everyone arguing I decided to unleash a Box of Spirits from the Krispy Kreme ala "Raiders of The Lost Ark" killing the negative influences and saving my team. But I decided to take advantage of the fact Lewis "Linkara" Lovhaug, Amy Jo Johnson and Jason David Frank was in town and I asked if they'd be willing to be a part of my review which was also a saving grace vocally as I was going to dub Rita vocally but Amy was willing to go the extra mile. Also a lucky break was the fact that Gus was able to fit into Linkara's Green Ranger suit. But what really was great was everyone of you who checked out the review and the fact everyone enjoyed it. I am so glad you enjoyed it.

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number Four

4) Bad Romance

James Faraci (Voiceover):
I needed to do this. I needed to get out my rage towards the genre out in the three month review marathon that is the season premiere. Thankfully people understood that while I may not like the Genre they now are aware of the crap and can avoid it. Do I still hold on to a shred of hope that Romantic Comedies can be salvaged? A little. Plus it was a release just to go where I went in my "Hitch" review and I felt the ending of the "Hitch" review was the perfect time to start a storyline that'd be a little longer than people expected. When will the storyline end? Soon... I hope (Cut to ending of "Hitch" review as James' voice echoes "TO HELL WITH YOU!" before cutting to black then cutting to 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number three

3) The Rocky Horror Picture Show Review

James Faraci (Voiceover):

The second most ambitious review I've done this year. The most ambitious one is at the top of the list. I am wholly thankful to Julia Alexa Miller, Taylor Huff, Marcella Di Pasquale, Maria Feist, Cam Dodson, Nick Slimmer and everyone from "Life As A Mermaid" that could be a part of this. I say everyone that could be a part of this because originally Johnny Berchtold was meant to be Dr. Vienerschnitzel and Diego Torres Kuri was going to be the Rocky Horror Creature. But due to the Horrible act of nature in Mexico Diego had to bow out and Johnny Berchtold had other engagements as we were many of the people I needed. But I am grateful to everyone who had signed on and my friends who did so much to see this happen. This took place ALL over Sullivan County. The exterior of Vienerschnitzel's place is in fact an old Hospital that had been shut down and it's a few stones throws from my Alma Matter Sullivan County BOCES, The Interior of the Vienerschnitzel's were made by a good friend of mine named Thorn Winter and that's just a few of the Behind The Scenes I remember off hand and yet despite the chaos. It became one of my best reviews of 2017 and to Julia Alexa Miller for being so strong and great a director to take the reins and make sure that this was one of the best of the year. (Show clip in which James ends the review as he sing speaks the last bit before fading to black)

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): Number two

2) The Muppet Movies for Muppet Wish Day

James Faraci (Voiceover):
Probably one of the most fun reviews because I got to remember what it is I loved about the Muppets on the big screen. There were fewer restrictions on what they could do. I especially loved getting the team in on the fun of the Cabin Fever musical number in "Muppet Treasure Island". In addition, I got to say my thoughts on Kermit's new performer and for me Jim Henson or Steve Whitmire's capability to bring Kermit to life will never be topped, I must admit Matt Vogel's performance has become less polarizing. Is he good? Not yet. Is it the Kermit I've known all 35 years of my life? Not really but I hope Matt Vogel will find his inner Kermit and let everyone see Kermit and not think okay, it's him but it's not him. Matt I wish you the best and I wish there'll be more Muppet Movies for Generations to come.

(A Hand pulling a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the Robo Knight Robo Morpher and punching in the code 428 from the 0:00-0:03 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:04 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows James Faraci morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans with his Long sleeve Tee-Shirt with the American flag design on it, Blue cargo Jeans and Tan Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James stocking up on his arsenal from the Classic Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Morpher, a bandoleer stocked up with Sonic Screwdrivers, Ammunition for a 303 British Rifle and said rifle, The Ring Of Aeon, The Gem From the Gauntlet Malachite’s Hand, Emmalina’s amulet and the Sword Of Caliverti from 0:08-0:15 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators. 0:15-0:29 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run shows James leaping and running through moments from the 2016 calendar year of his reviews ranging from James morphing into his new suit for the first time, James getting slapped by Paulo, Mr. B Natural pop jump cutting into frame as James grabs Rowdy & The Nostalgia Kid as they scream in terror, Traci Hines shooting the Double Barreled handgun, Everyone trying to stop Eliza Dushku from using her switchblade knife on an unconscious Spoony,  James blast jumps and Eliza rolls out of the way as an electrical pulse knocks out everyone else before cutting to the clip of The Moviebusters pulling out their Proton Pack blasters until the 0:30 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows the team line-up of the majority of 2015 walking towards the screen as the camera rises over to see the American Flag and James’ signal in the sky as before cutting to James as he jumps and pulls out a sonic screwdriver before cutting over to a slab of titanium where lasers cut out “The Last Of The Americans” until 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run when James lands on top of the slab while doing a heroic pose with Paulo & Brenda Fonseca, Andrew Beach, John Santos & Eric Kurtzke on his right and Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Ed Champion, Olivia Horvath, Renee Miller and Mike Santos on his left doing their own heroic poses on a black background the 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then the camera zooms to the backside of the slab with the number and James doing a voiceover the clip.)

James Faraci (Voiceover): And THE number one The Last Of The Americans moment from 2017 is....

1)The Wonder Woman review

James Faraci (Voiceover):
This is probably the MOST ambitious review I've ever done, Bar NONE. I surprised myself because I was able to get Eric Rodriguez aka The Blockbuster Buster to be a part of it. Even though he didn't watch it. No matter how I tried. So having to tell E-Rod about the movie was hard but I was able to tell him where he would be getting involved and how he'd be in the review and I miraculously was able to get him to deal with me behind the camera and he graciously allowed me the chance to do the review. With a proviso, he didn't just want to sit behind a desk to do this review and wanted the both of us to be in the recreated clips of the review. So the opening was going to be traditional to the clipless review but afterwards was going to be interesting. Although I couldn't get through the thick head of The Blockbuster Buster to check out the Wonder Woman movie, I hope that people will see that complaining and being all I don't wanna and you shouldn't because I don't like it doesn't make you good. It makes you out to be an ass! But if anyone gets the idea to keep an open mind about things that everyone doesn't like then this review did it's job (Show clip of James, The Blockbuster Buster and "Wonder Woman" take on Ares as "The Majestic Tale (of An Idiot With a Box)" plays before cutting to James physically)

James Faraci:

What's gonna happen in 2018?  (Cut to clips of James and some of the subjects James will be talking about as James does a voiceover)

James Faraci (Voiceover):

In 2018 prepare for the fifth year anniversary as more movies and tv series are reviewed, more top tens including a Top Ten in March celebrating Three Successful seasons of the Web Series "Life As A Mermaid", A continuation of my Summer Retrospect to see where things are gonna go for the Schiff-verse of Mermaids and coming this summer with all the red tape cleared up. Coming to Manic Expression.com My Channel Awesome trilogy. But up next from January through March prepare for the Winter Olympics as I talk about three tales of Olympic Champions. Prepare to "Live To Win-Ter" (Cut to James physically)

James Faraci:

Once again thank you all for checking me out and keeping me going. Thanks to Manic Expression for keeping us going and... (James pulls out the Morpher and Morphs into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans)

TLOTA:

Let's make 2018 the year of good! I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's my opinion!