Thursday, November 9, 2017

Melting "The Chocolate Factory" Co-Written by Steve Kidd

(A Hand pulls out a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the Robo Knight Robo Morpher and punching in the code 428 from the 0:00-0:03 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run. 0:04 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows James Faraci morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans with his Long sleeve Tee-Shirt with the American flag design on it, Blue cargo Jeans and Tan Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James stocking up on his arsenal from the Classic Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Morpher, a bandoleer stocked up with Sonic Screwdrivers, Ammunition for a 303 British Rifle and said rifle, The Ring Of Aeon, The Gem From the Gauntlet Malachite’s Hand, Emmalina’s amulet and the Sword Of Caliverti from 0:08-0:15 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators. 0:15-0:29 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run shows James leaping and running through moments from the 2016 calendar year of his reviews ranging from James morphing into his new suit for the first time, James getting slapped by Paulo, Mr. B Natural pop jump cutting into frame as James grabs Rowdy & The Nostalgia Kid as they scream in terror, Traci Hines shooting the Double Barreled handgun, Everyone trying to stop Eliza Dushku from using her switchblade knife on an unconscious Spoony,  James blast jumps and Eliza rolls out of the way as an electrical pulse knocks out everyone else before cutting to the clip of The Moviebusters pulling out their Proton Pack blasters until the 0:30 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows the team line-up of the majority of 2015 walking towards the screen as the camera rises over to see the American Flag and James’ signal in the sky as before cutting to James as he jumps and pulls out a sonic screwdriver before cutting over to a slab of titanium where lasers cut out “The Last Of The Americans” until 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run when James lands on top of the slab while doing a heroic pose with Steve Kidd, Paulo & Brenda Fonseca, Andrew Beach, John Santos & Eric Kurtzke on his right and Rebecca & Nick Yaun, Ed Champion, Olivia Horvath, Renee Miller and Mike Santos on his left doing their own heroic poses on a black background the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James as he cleans up the studio and whistles “Frolic” by Luciano Michelini as he puts the floor buffer up he passes by Steve Kidd writing in a notebook)
TLOTA:
Hey Steve.
Steve Kidd:
Hey James. (James continues to whistle as he goes into the kitchen to make a cup of Warm Spiced Apple Cider for a few more seconds before James walks back to Steve)
TLOTA:
Steve, what are you doing here?
Steve Kidd:
Oh, nothing much just writing down ideas Warner Brothers I know will eventually do. (James looks over Steve’s shoulder)
TLOTA:
“Tom & Jerry in Rocky”, “Tom & Jerry in Blazing Saddles”, “Tom & Jerry in Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice”, “Tom & Jerry in Kickassia”, “Tom & Jerry in Suburban Knights”, “Tom & Jerry in To Boldly Flee”, “Tom & Jerry in Blade Runner”, “Tom & Jerry in The Room”, “Tom & Jerry In The Lord Of The Rings”, “Tom & Jerry In Harry Potter”, “Tom & Jerry In The Wicker Man”?  Jeez dude, how many “Tom & Jerry” Crossovers are in this.
Steve:
About as much as those schmucks at Warner Brothers can make. (Cut to clips of “Tom & Jerry: Wizard Of Oz”, “Tom & Jerry: Sherlock Holmes”, “Tom & Jerry: Robin Hood” & “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory” as Steve does a voiceover)
Steve (Voiceover):
And haven’t they done enough with the two in these situations? I mean come on Wizard of Oz, Sherlock Holmes, Robin Hood all of them have been getting Tom & Jerry Shoehorned in and 95 % of the time they distract from the actual movie that we should be watching. That’s not a good thing. If I want to watch The Wizard of Oz. I DON’T want to see Tom & Jerry being the reason the water bucket nearly didn’t make it to Dorothy. I want to see Basil Rathbone’s portrayal of Sherlock Holmes solve the crime. NOT Tom & Jerry slip the clue that Moriarty did it to Sherlock Holmes. I want to see the Errol Flynn version of Robin Hood save the day. NOT see Tom and Jerry do something to distract Robin from his mission! And guess what, if I want to see the Gene Wilder classic version “Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory” Guess what, I don’t want to see. TOM AND FREAKING JERRY! (Cut to James and Steve.)
TLOTA:
I see what you did. You’re gonna regret how you set me up for this.
 (Cut to the opening credit of “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory” before cutting to clips of the movie as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
(Sighs) Why? Just Why? I want to know who thought this was a good idea. “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory” rolls right off the tongue about as much as FrankenSharknado and The Vampire Mummy’s Vengeance! I love the Gene Wilder classic 1970’s musical children’s movie classic and I love Tom & Jerry. I also like Seltzer and Warm Apple Cider with spices but if I mix the two it’d be crap! (Cut to James and Steve physically as Steve is about to open his mouth before hearing a laugh then cut to the door as a Lindsay Nagel-esque exec played by Olivia Horvath stands in the doorway with an army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec.:
Mr. Faraci, this was a passion project we had to honor the memory of the Gene Wilder classic and introduce it to newer generations. (Cut to James and Steve.)
Steve Kidd:
If by “Honor the Memory of the Gene Wilder classic” you mean digging up Gene’s freshly deceased corpse, taking it into the back of a van doing things that would make necrophiles sick, putting the corpse back in its grave, alleviating your bladder and bowels over the now very defiled corpse and then burying it and hope you’re not going to be sent for hell for what you did.
TLOTA:
Steve, settle down. Besides if you kill one of them two hundred dozen more take its place and I have to clean up the mess. Besides you and I know what’s true about the 1970’s Gene Wilder classic “Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory”
(Cut to stills of the 1970’s Gene Wilder movie and Tom & Jerry Shorts as James does voiceovers.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
What everyone loves about the 1970’s classic was Gene Wilder’s charm as Willy Wonka. The music is iconic, the effects while dated has aged well for the most part and the shorts featuring Tom & Jerry are legendary. So, seeing these two come together seems like a match made by chart lovers and memo makers. NOT by fans of both or any person with more than five active braincells! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
You call them Chart Lovers and Memo Makers, I call them real people who made sure “Suicide Squad” made it the Academy Award winning, critical and commercial success. (Cut to James as he tries to hold Steve off before he goes after her)
TLOTA:
No, they’re the people who live in their own fantasy that everything they do is right and anyone who tells you the truth or ignores reality. (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
You get us! (Cut to James & Steve)
Steve:
You’re gonna make him cuckoo before the review is over aren’t you.
(Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
Is there any other way you can phrase that? (Cut to James & Steve)
TLOTA:
NO! And we’re reviewing this now.
Steve:
Um, I’ve got somewhere else to go… (James grabs Steve and slams him back down in his seat)
TLOTA:
You started this mess, you’re gonna sit here and review it with me. This is “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory”
Steve:
CRAP!
 (Cut to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
So as the movie begins… Yeah, we hit problem number one this being a literal shot for shot remake of the intro except for the fact it’s animated! Be afraid people, be very afraid.
Steve (Voiceover)
We’re soon introduced to two of our titular characters Tom and Jerry. And to this movie’s very insignificant credit it does something the 1990’s “Movie” did for a few minutes it keeps Tom & Jerry SILENT! Letting their slapstick and their actions do the talking especially when Jerry outsmarts Tom and when Jerry makes into the Candy store. (Show moment of “The Candy Man” being performed by Jess Harnell for two seconds before cutting to James and Steve physically.)
TLOTA:
Jess Harnell, what are you doing here? Were the residuals from Animaniacs not enough? Are the Ticket sales from your concerts not making as much as you hoped for? Is your music not selling on the Digital market? WHY?! WHY ARE YOU HERE?! (Cut to stills of the voiceover actors from “Animaniacs” as James and Steve do voiceovers)
 TLOTA (Voiceover):
For those who don’t know Jess Harnell was one of the primary voice actors in the animated series “Animaniacs”. He played Wakko Warner amongst other characters in the series. Here he plays both the guy who runs the candy store and Grandpa Joe.
Steve (Voiceover):
Wait so they got one of the guys who performed on Animaniacs which was produced by Steven Freaking Spielberg and he’s in this movie as The Candy Man & Grandpa Joe?!? Oh GOD! What the hell did The Warners say to make him do this but the fact he is in this made me wonder what bad career decisions he made to get to this point!
(Cut to the movie as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
After we hear about the Candy man we meet up with Charlie as…. BADABOOMBAH! (Cut to James and Steve physically)
TLOTA:
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THE ANIMATION?! DID YOU NUMBNUTTED NIMRODS TELL THE ANIMATORS TO MAKE IT LOOK THAT BAD?
Steve:
It doesn’t look that bad. (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
I have no idea what you’re talking about. (Cut to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
To the very insignificant amount of credit to the animators for keeping this movie as two dimensional as possible. Under the right circumstances old school animation is better than 3D animation but most of the time in this movie it doesn't even look like you were trying. So a third of the time the animation in this movie is amazing, the other two thirds are either lazy or SOUL SUCKING SCARY! But again, I digress. Charlie stops Tom from Eating Jerry and gives the two a loaf of bread meaning his family that would’ve gotten the bread instead now must live off… (Cut to Charlie complaining about the Cabbage Soup giving the loaf of bread to his family saying he had two but gave one to friends as Steve sputters and shouts “WAIT A MINUTE!” before cutting to James physically)
Steve:
SO HE HAD TWO LOAVES OF BREAD THE WHOLE DAMNED TIME?! HOW WERE YOU ABLE TO PULL THAT ONE OFF?!  Because if my memory serves me right… (Cut to the Gene Wilder classic as Steve does a voiceover)
Steve (Voiceover):
Charlie was only able to afford one loaf of bread after getting his paycheck and the family feasted on that. There was no second loaf! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
We added it in to make sure Tom & Jerry were well taken care of and… (Cut to the movie as the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec does a voiceover.)
L.N. Exec (Voiceover):
It allows Tom & Jerry to do something nice for Charlie as they decide to repay his kindness by taking a box of Wonka’s Chocolate bars that was recently delivered to The Candy shop only for Charlie to tell the two to return the box to the store. Making Charlie a more innocent and wholesome character. (Cut to the Gene Wilder classic and the “Charlie & The Chocolate Factory” Tim Burton movie as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Yeah but that’s the thing in the original Charlie was a good kid but he was also something that your version lacks. It’s called being human! Yeah, he was a bit of an annoyance with his occasional bout of him doubting if he was going to get that golden ticket but that is what Peter Ostrum brought to the character. He was altruistic but that wasn’t what defined Charlie. What defined Charlie was that he knew the odds were against him but he persevered and eventually he knew what the right thing to do was and was rewarded by becoming Wonka’s heir to the throne! Even Tim Burton’s version had that going for it but they also made Charlie so innocent and morally upright that even Wonka’s teeth would’ve rotted out of his head! So, the idea of doing what you did in your version made less sense than the Tim Burton version.  (Cut to Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory as James and Steve do voiceovers)
Steve (Voiceover):
The next morning as Charlie is in school, the announcement of Wonka’s Golden Tickets is told and as everyone runs out of School Charlie has somewhat of an overconfident smile or a look that says “I’m Gonna get away with something really, really wrong.”
TLOTA (Voiceover):
 Tom & Jerry try again to take the Crate of Wonka Bars but again Charlie puts the Kibosh on that leading to one of the few good moments in this waste of Animation. (Show clip of Tom & Jerry banging their heads on the wall before cutting to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
Why is that moment good? It’s just Tom & Jerry banging their heads on the wall. (Cut to James.)
TLOTA:
Because it is how I and everyone who heard about this thing felt and after watching did that just to make themselves smarter and this what everyone who works on Tom and Jerry feel they have to do because soulless execs and Charts say that is what they must do because this is the latest movie just to shoehorn the two into classic movies. (Cut to clips of “Tom & Jerry: Wizard Of Oz”, “Tom & Jerry: Sherlock Holmes”, “Tom & Jerry: Robin Hood” & “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory” as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
I know my associate said this earlier, but it bears repeating I loved the classics but seeing Tom & Jerry Shoehorned into Wizard Of Oz, Robin Hood, Sherlock Holmes and now this movie doesn’t enhance it. Tom and Jerry distract from the actual movie that we should be watching. That’s not a good thing. If I want to watch The Wizard Of Oz with my nieces. I DON’T want to see Tom & Jerry being the reason the water bucket nearly didn’t make it to Dorothy. I want to see Basil Rathbone’s portrayal of Sherlock Holmes solve the crime. NOT Tom & Jerry slip the clue that Moriarty did it to Sherlock Holmes. I want to see the Errol Flynn version of Robin Hood save the day. NOT see Tom and Jerry do something to distract Robin from his mission! And guess what, if I want to see the Gene Wilder classic version “Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory” Guess what, I don’t want to see. TOM & JERRY! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
L.N. Exec:
We’re not saying you can’t watch the classics, this is our way of helping kids get into the classics. (Cut to James and Steve.)
TLOTA:
Well here’s a wild idea, why not have the parents or grandparents, aunts, uncles and other associated family members of Kids show the classics to the kids. That way they can get into the classics and not have Tom and Jerry be a part of the proceedings! I watched so many classic movies through my parents and my grandparents showing them to me! That is how it’s supposed to be done!
Steve Kidd:
I agree with you on that dude.
(Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions.)
Chart liking Exec No.1 (Played by Eric Kurtzke):
Well our charts say… (Cut to James.)
TLOTA:
Well my Charts say it’s time to play a game of “Ring The Bell” (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec and her army of same suited minions as the minions say to each other “Ring The Bell? How does one play Ring The Bell?” & “I don’t know” before James lassoes The Lindsay Nagel Exec’s minions and Steve drops a gigantic trash can over them as James and Steve hits the trash can while James sings.)
TLOTA (Singing):
TIME TO RING THE BELLLLLLLLLLLLL! RING THE BELL! THE BELL! RING THE BELL! TIME TO RING THE BELLLLLLLLLLLLL! RING THE BELL! THE BELL! RING THE BELL! THE BELL! (James raises the trash can and sees the minions rattling around before dropping like flies then cut to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
So as in the original, the other tickets are found in succession by Augustus, Veruca, Violette and Mike soon it is heard that Alberto Minoleta found the final ticket as done by a humorous cameo by who else (Show cameo by Droopy as he says “I’ve never been happier! Ole!”  before returning to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers)
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
WHY IN THE HELL IS DROOPY IN THIS? HE WASN’T HANNA-BARBERA’S PROPERTY! HE WAS FREAKING DONE BY TEX AVERY!
TLOTA (Voiceover):
I’ll field this one. MGM owned the rights to the properties of Tom and Jerry and every other character in MGM and Hanna-Barbera’s library were bought out by Ted Turner who also has a stake in Warner Brothers which allows them the right to use the Hanna-Barbera and MGM Character Library as they see fit. But I digress, Tom & Jerry earn some cash through recycling and it ends in the drain next to where Charlie finds the money to buy the Wonka bar from the box Tom & Jerry just as Droopy’s Alberto Minoleta is arrested for fraud for the fifth ticket. (Show Droopy being cuffed and arrested as Droopy’s Alberto Minoleta says “Aye Carumba!” and Charlie discovers the fifth ticket and is stopped by Slugworth who after giving Charlie the speech about getting the Everlasting Gobstopper then from out of nowhere sings Veruca Salt’s song before James sputters and shouts “WAIT A MINUTE!” before cutting to James and Steve physically as he sputters and foams at the mouth and twitch)
TLOTA:
WHY DID YOU HAVE SLUGWORTH SING “I WANT IT NOW!”? IT MAKES NO SENSE! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec:
Well it shows how greedy Slugworth is and the type of evil he must face. (Cut to the movie as the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec does a voiceover.)
L.N. Exec (Voiceover):
As a matter of fact, the reason he’s drawn like that and sings “I want it now!” because Slugworth is so greedy he makes Veruca Salt look tame in comparison and the animation whist he sings it is trippy is to show how demented the mindset of the villain can be.
TLOTA (Voiceover):
While you make a decent point and when I say decent I mean barely decent by even the dumbest human’s standards there are two arguments I must make towards your statement. One, having Slugworth sing the song here actually makes Veruca singing it pointless later. Secondly and this one is the more important one, ITS DISCOVERED LATER THAT THE GUY WHO EVERYONE THINKS IS SLUGWORTH ISN’T SLUGWORTH! Who Slugworth is in this and the classic movie is an employee of Wonka to aid in Wonka's test. He wasn't the villain or a spy. It was part of the ruse made by Wonka.  (Cut to James and Steve physically)
TLOTA:
Even Steve here can agree that this makes no sense! Am I right? (Steve sputters and foams at the mouth and falls) And now I need to break out the extra strength “Liquid I.Q.”
(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it act as the commercial break intro and cutting to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
 Tom & Jerry flushes the characters down the drain symbolism at its most apropos in this movie. Charlie rushes home and shows everyone the fifth Golden ticket, asks Grandpa Joe to come with him to the Chocolate Factory. Then comes the big day when Willy Wonka comes to take the kids into the factory and Grandpa Joe accidentally leaves the ticket only for Tom & Jerry through the power of lame humor to get the Ticket back just in the nick of time.
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
 After the kids head into the factory, Tom and Jerry discover the Delivery guy played by Spike and “Slugworth” talking about their “Nefarious Plot”. Tom and Jerry sneak in the backdoor following Spike & “Slugworth” only to stumble across the OOMPA-LOOMPA intern Tuffy and by all that is good does Tuffy make me want to find a 12-gauge shotgun and shoot every mouse off the face the earth with deer slugs.
(Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec:
But our test audiences found Tuffy “Iwwesitable” (Cut to James and Steve.)
TLOTA & Steve (In Unison):
Well we find Tuffy “Weepulsive” & “Weepugnant” (Cut to classic Tom & Jerry shorts where Nibbles (AKA “Tuffy”) are a part of the proceedings as James does a voiceover)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
But that wasn’t always the case. Yeah Tuffy or Nibbles as he was known before someone decided to rebrand the character may have been a third wheel but at the very least he added a little more something entertaining to the events of the shorts he was in. He wasn’t there simply to be the cute voice and tell Tom and Jerry what to do and where to go. (Cut to Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory as James and Steve do voiceovers)
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
The three make it to the Chocolate room only for Tom and Jerry distract from the “Pure Imagination” song. Ironic seeing as how the movie lacks pure imagination. They stop "Slugworth" and Spike after Augustus is sucked up into the Fudge Room and miss the boat but fortunately Tuffy keeps a spare Wonka-Tania as we see Tom & Jerry go into “The Tunnel from Hell” making that moment the second to last good moment in this movie outside of this movie ending. (Show Tuffy act possessed as he recites “Wonka’s Tunnel Song and Speech” as Tom and Jerry look as if they’re about to soil themselves before cutting to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec:
Why is that the second to last good moment in the movie? Was it you found Tuffy so cute and precious? (Cut to James as he and Steve chimes the word “Wrong” like a clock and then chimes “You’re Wrong! You’re Wrong! You’re Wrong! You’re Wroooong!” before cutting to the movie as James does a voiceover.)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Because this was the second to last legitimately somewhat interesting moment because we had already seen the moment from the eyes of the people involved in the trip already. So, seeing what happens from the perspective of those outside the movie looking in as if they were a part of the proceedings of the movie is an interesting idea. (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec (Singing):
What can I say except “You’re Welcome”! (Cut to James and Steve.)
Steve Kidd:
No, you had no hand in that!  The fact you think you deserve any sort of credit for the Tunnel scene and how it turned out is ludicrous!  (Cut to the movie as James and Steve do voiceovers)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
As everyone makes it into the invention room the usual happens and SERIOUSLY?! This is ANIMATION and you can’t make Violette’s face turn darker as she becomes a blueberry?!
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
But as that happens we get more of Tom & Jerry trying to be in the movie as they’re chased by “Slugworth” & Spike after they roll Violette down to the juicing room. Then of course the fizzy lifting drink room and even the goose scene as Tom, Jerry & Tuffy try to outrun the followers of Mola Ram and Kali Ma. Whoops I meant to say outrun “Slugworth” & Spike as Veruca and “Slugworth” make “I Want it now” a duet! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec:
Well it goes to show how greedy both are in their own unique ways. (Cut to James trying to hold back Steve who has the look of beating the hell INTO the Lindsay Nagel-Esque exec.)
TLOTA:
No, it shows how you’re destroying the classic movie and how you are working my last good nerve. Why I haven’t thrown you out I have no clue but maybe I should take a cue from the movie. (Cut to Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory as James and Steve do voiceovers)
TLOTA (Voiceover):
Especially when we see Tuffy, Tom, Jerry, Veruca and her dad wind up in the furnace as it gets ready to ignite!
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
I can think of something this moment is missing…. (Cut to James and Steve dressed in Janitorial gear at the furnace controls as dissonant voices of the Lindsay Nagel-Esque exec, her same suited minions, and every character from “Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka And The Chocolate factory” are trapped inside before James looks at his watch and signals Steve to flip the switch to ignite the furnace causing blood curdling screams as he hears them all scream in pain as they die. All while James and Steve walk away as the painful screams start to die down before cutting to Tom & Jerry: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory as James and Steve do voiceovers)
Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
While everyone in the furnace survives, the rest of them make it to Wonka’s shrinking device, Mike meets his fate and we get close to the ending everyone knows and expects that is until Tuffy, Tom & Jerry tell Charlie and Grandpa Joe about Slugworth and after some less then funny slap schtick. it looks like we finally get the ending where of course Wonka blows his stack at Charlie, Grandpa Joe, Tom, Jerry and Tuffy.
TLOTA (Voiceover)
Of course Wonka tells us that they lose after showing the photostatic copy of the contract we DIDN’T  see get signed but even then Charlie decides to return the Gobstopper even though he had earned that and the Factory no questions asked but soon enough we get the ending everyone knows except for the fact Tuffy is with Wonka, Charlie and Grandpa Joe and Tom & Jerry Shrink “Slugworth” and Spike with Wonka’s shrinking device and take two Fizzy lifting drinks to fly alongside the Wonka-Vator and of course the movie comes to the best part “The End”! (Cut to the Lindsay Nagel-esque exec.)
L.N. Exec:
Thus, making it THE most enjoyed movie by everyone. No one can say a bad word about it. (Cut to James and Steve as Steve gets up, adjusts himself and prepares to unleash every ounce of anger onto the Lindsay Nagel-Esque Exec as he shouts “FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU.” as fire and skulls are around Steve Kidd and James just sits there and The Lindsay Nagel-Esque exec looks like she’s about to soil herself before cutting the fire and skulls out around Steve)
Steve Kidd:
THIS MOVIE IS TRASH! (Cut to clips of the movie as Steve continues his rant in a voiceover)

Steve Kidd (Voiceover):
THERE WAS NO REASON TO MAKE THIS MOVIE FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN TO MAKE MONEY! YOU EVICERATED EVERYTHING ABOUT TOM, JERRY AND “WILLY WONKA & THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY” YOU CASH COW MILK SUCKING EVIL! YOU MANHANDLED THE WONKA CHARACTERS SO BADLY YOU CHOKED THE LIFE OUT OF THEM, TOM AND JERRY FEEL OUT OF PLACE, AND THE DROOPY AND TUFFY APPEARANCES ARE AS ANNOYING AND UNNEEDED AS IS USUAL WITH THIS TYPE OF CRAP! (Cut to Steve Kidd physically)

Steve Kidd:
AND I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU AND THE REST OF THE WB ANIMATION PRODUCTION PULLS THIS WITH A "TOM AND JERRY HARRY POTTER" MOVIE,I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GONNA RAISE SO MUCH HELL THAT SATAN WILL BE THROWING A PARTY IN MY HONOR AS I FORCE EVERY STINKING LAST ONE OF YOU TALENTLESS JACKASSES TO WATCH THE REACTIONS TO THESE MOVIES FROM NOW UNTIL THE END OF FREAKING TIME!!!!  (Steve sighs then sits down after that rant)
TLOTA:
Now every bad word about this travesty has been said. So the only thing I can do is to sing about how bad this movie is. (James pulls out the Dragon Dagger and plays the first Dragonzord song which activates the trap that sends her onto a treadmill over to the couch which traps her as a "Honk Honk" is heard and sent down a chute screaming for her life before cutting to Team TLOTA, Steve Kidd, The Nostalgia Kid, Huey Toonmore & The Hardcore Kid as “Augustus Gloop’s Oompa Loompa song” from “Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory” sound alike plays in the foreground.)
Everyone singing in Chorused harmony:
Oompa-Loompa Doom-petty ducks, it is to safe say this movie sucks! Oompa-Loompa Doom-petty crux. (Cut to clips of the movie as it’s shrunk to the center of the screen as everyone continues to sing.)
Everyone singing in Chorused harmony (Audio only):
Avoid this movie and save your bucks.
Steve Kidd, Huey Toonmore & The Hardcore Kid (Top Right corner as both sing):
What do you do to a movie that’s good?
The Nostalgia Kid (Center top as he sings):
Toss Tom & Jerry in and turn it to poo!
Rebecca, Nick, Paulo, Brenda & Olivia (Center right as they sing):
Where are you at getting everyone mad? (The footage of Tom and Jerry is still centered as everyone is circled around the footage)
Everyone singing in Chorused harmony:
Did you not think you'd see a Jihad?! (The footage is replaced for James in the center)
TLOTA (Singing):
It would not surprise me! (The footage of Tom and Jerry is still centered as everyone is circled around the footage)
Everyone singing in Chorused harmony:
Oompa-Loompa Doom-petty dar! If you don't watch this, you will go far.  Avoid this movie if you can just like… (The footage is replaced for James in the center)
TLOTA (Singing):
James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans! (James walks back to his office stops turns to the door) And that’s my opinion! (James closes the door before cutting to black)