Tuesday, November 17, 2015

In Defense of... The Ewoks

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it then cutting to James in his chair)

I’m James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans and the views I’m about to express are that of my own & some of yours and welcome to another edition of "In Defense Of..." (Show pics of maligned pieces of pop culture while the fanfare from the Olympics  play and James comes up after Vanilla Ice slides back and his right hand thumbs up and the words "In Defense Of..."  before cutting to clips from the trailers of "Star Wars: The Force Awakens" and the other Star Wars movies while James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover): This December "Star Wars" will return to theaters under the direction of J.J. Abrams and I do wish"Star Wars: The Force Awakens" all the luck in the world because it has a lot to live up to and a lot of people hope that it will be better than what a lot of the Prequels had to offer especially when it came to who they tried to push to the forefront especially Anakin & Jar-Jar. But here's the thing... With Anakin he was necessary, he becomes Darth Vader. Jar-Jar was pretty much useless after Episode one. In fact had he not been in Episode Two The Clone Wars wouldn't have happened, Palpatine wouldn't have been given a permanent seat of power and everything wouldn't have gone straight to hell on an intergalactic level. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA: But here's the thing Jar-Jar maybe considered the most annoying thing now but back in the days of the original three of "Star Wars", "The Empire Strikes Back" & "Return Of The Jedi" there was something that annoyed everyone that to be honest is not as annoying as it is now. That of course being "The Ewoks". (Cut to clips of "Return Of The Jedi" as James does a voiceover.)

TLOTA (Voiceover): And to be honest they didn't annoy me because quite honestly the Empire pretty much used their home, the forest moon of Endor to basically build in secret the second Death Star and when they saw them, they weren't sure as to who to trust and the Rebels didn't help until Leia showed Wicket that she wasn't the bad guy because let's face it when creatures twice your size have weapons that could end your existence, you find out how hard it is to trust people and wouldn't you feel the same way they did? So when the other Ewoks met Luke, Han, Chewbacca, R2-D2& C-3PO it's no wonder they thought C-3PO was a deity he treated them with respect by simply saying "Hello" in their language or at least tried to and when C-3PO told them about who his friends were and meant, it allowed them to re-open their belief and trust in others, is it no wonder Luke, Leia, Han, Chewbacca, C-3PO and R2-D2 and the Rebels were welcomed into their tribe. They were twice their size and were going to use what they had to stop the others who are going to use their weapons that could end The Ewoks' existence, so they would friend with those who were going to help preserve their forest moon and in some weird way, The Ewoks are a microcosm of what the Rebels are so when they accepted the Rebels into their tribe, they felt they could trust the Rebels with the knowledge of where the Empire is working on their home and found the courage to fight for their forest moon and let's face it as far as Emperor Palpatine and the Imperial Forces were concerned The Forest Moon of Endor was just a speck of dirt but to the Ewoks it was their home and they were fighting in their backyard, they were fighting for their families, the pain hurts less and it makes more sense and they knew every Nook & Cranny of the Forest Moon and they were going to use what they had to give the Rebels the Advantage because again The Forest Moon of Endor was their home and it helped by giving The Ewoks and The Rebels everything it could to help end The Empire as much as the Rebels in the Space Battle and Luke taking on both The Emperor and Darth Vader. Even after the most intense scene when the Ewoks are running and one takes a blast meant for the other, the other one knew that in order to make what his friend did meant something was to help the others take down the Empire and unlike The Empire who had become set in their ways, I applaud the Ewoks in their creativity in taking them down by getting Chewie to get two of them to help overtake one of their Imperial Walkers and to me watching the one Storm Trooper getting clotheslined, then one of his buddies getting spun into a tree, then watching as Imperial Walkers were getting beaten by trees was a very joyous moment because they used what they had to in order to drive the Imperial Forces off their planet and in a unique way they helped the Rebels obtain the Balance and helped restore freedom to the Galaxies in a way The Rebels WISHED they had tried and for that I give praise to the unsung Furry Heroes of The Forest Moon of Endor. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: Plus they got two spin-off movies featuring them and a pretty awesome cartoon series that showed what their lives were like before being a part of the "Star Wars" movies series with a very memorable first season theme song. (Cut to the Opening of "The Ewoks" cartoon with the "We are the E-E-E-E-E-EWOKS with the spirits of The Forest Moon" theme song before cutting to James getting down with his bad self.)

TLOTA: What can I say? It's a good beat to dance to. I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's My Opinion.