Sunday, March 29, 2015

The Last Of The Americans tries to watch Foodfight and stay sane

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James physically)


TLOTA: I'm James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans and the views I'm about to express are that of my own & some of yours. Now around this time last year I tried to do a "Let's Play" but this time I'm going to try to do something even more outrageous. (Cut to clips of "Food Fight".)

TLOTA (Voice over): Around this time last year The Nostalgia Critic lost his sanity in the process while reviewing a movie called "Foodfight" and I thought it was because he was barely sane to begin with. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: So I figured I'd give it a go and see if I stay sane in the process. Let's check out "Foodfight". (Cut to a black screen with the words "One view and several hours later in which we see a padded cell and James screaming, ranting and raving and bouncing off the walls before James looks at the camera)

TLOTA: I tried and I'm going to be here for a while! I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and ooh! Meatballs for dinner everybody! DON'T LET THE CANIBALS KNOW!


Film Brain (Audio only): Symbolism!

The Blockbuster Buster (Audio only): Silly Sally sells seashells by the seashore! and Heimdall has Jalapeños in his hairy hindquarters! (Giggling insanely)

A.D.A. Rafael Barba (Audio only): WE NEED A REVOLUTION! DEATH TO THE OPPRESSORS!

(Cut to an image of James with a gigantic open faced smile as the Losing Horn from "The Price Is Right" plays as a stamp places over the face "APRIL FOOL'S")
 
 


Monday, March 16, 2015

Five of Kevin Smith's Finest

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it before cutting to James physically)

TLOTA: I'm James Faraci, The Last Of The Americans and the views I'm about to express are that of my own & some of yours. It goes without saying that I freaking adore the works of Kevin Smith. (Cut to clips of Kevin Smith while James does a voice over.)

TLOTA (Voice over): And for good reason. He has made movies that are considered stories that are a great slice of life, as a matter of fact five of his movies are five of my all time favorite movies and I'm going to do five rapid fire reviews on them. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA: That's right this is not a countdown. This is me talking about one of my favorite directors and his works and before I begin I already talked about Mallrats in January if you want my thoughts on that look in the January of this year's review so let's start this with the first piece of work I saw of Kevin Smith which is probably one of his best movies ever "Dogma"! (Cut to Opening credit of Dogma then clips of the movie as the main theatrical score by Howard Shore from this movie plays while James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): The premise of this movie is out there but in a good way. The Angel of Death named Loki played by Matt Damon having finished with the tenth plague of Egypt decided to go out for a drink with his friend a Grigori angel named Bartleby played by Ben Affleck and after being fifty sheets to the wind Bartleby convinces Loki to quit being The Angel of Death and he does so and flips God the bird. Pissed off by their arrogance the two were to be banished until the end of time to of all places Wisconsin. However an overzealous Catholic Cardinal played by the late great and immortal George Carlin decides bring Catholicism to the mainstream by rededicating a church in New Jersey and with Papal sanction gave said rededicated church Plenary Indulgence giving all those who pass through the archway of the church a morally clean slate. So it's up to an Abortion Clinical Worker who just so happens to be the Last Scion played by Linda Fiorentino, View Askew mainstays Jay & Silent Bob who in this movie happens to be the Prophets, The 13th Apostle played by Chris Rock & A muse with writer's block played by... by...by... ! (Show clip of Salma Hayek as The Muse while Bamboleo by The Gipsy Kings play before an audible slap is heard) Thanks I'm Back! Yep Salma Hayek plays the Muse. Where is God in all of this and how can our ragtag team of believers save the day, you may ask? Well you're going to have to watch the movie for yourself. Because if I give any more away it will spoil the movie. Let's just say that there is a reason I watch this movie every Good Friday. Because it is that good. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: And what did Kevin Smith follow that epic masterpiece up with? Probably the biggest middle finger to Hollywood that I've ever seen "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" (Cut to opening credit of "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" with Jungle Love by Morris Day and The Time playing in the background to clips of the movie as James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): So yeah kind of interesting thing originally this movie was meant to close out the View Askwewniverse which makes some sense. We start off with the two outside the Quick Stop and the RST Video Rental store next door like in "Clerks", They meet up with Brodie Bruce from "Mallrats" who now owns his own Comic Book Shop. Give a movie starring the only two characters that have been the only mainstays throughout the whole thing. Apparently Miramax purchased the rights to a comic in which the duo was based on which was mentioned in "Chasing Amy" and our heroes hit the road to get what's rightfully theirs, along the way they come upon a restaurant chain called "Mooby's", Mooby was introduced in "Dogma" and they meet some interesting characters such as a Federal Wildlife Marshall played by Will Ferrell, a hitchhiker played by the late great and immortal George Carlin, a nun played by Carrie Fisher, four very familiar people and their mangy dog, and a group of very, VERY gorgeous international jewel thieves, played by Elisa Dushku, Ali Larter, Shannon Elizabeth and Kevin Smith's wife herself Jennifer Schwalback Smith. I would say more but then I'd ruin every twist and joke in this thing so do yourself a favor and see this especially every April 20th. Because it is amazingly funny and a perfect middle finger Hollywood needed and still needs.(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: But believe it or not there is an even more bizarre movie made by Kevin Smith and is not a part of The View Askewniverse and the title itself is proof of how crazy it is. I am of course talking about "Zack and Miri make a Porno." (Cut to opening credit of "Zack and Miri make a Porno" with "Sex & Candy" by Marcy Playground playing in the background to clips of the movie as James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): And believe it or not Seth Rogen who plays Zack was amazing and the chemistry he has with Miri played by Elizabeth Banks was just as great. I enjoyed the actual relationship growth the two develop because it was natural, it wasn't forced. The plot of this one is simple yet it leads to real complexity. Zack and Miri are roommates who find their financial situation in Dire Straits. The only thing left to do for the duo is to make adult movies and if I were to say anymore of the plot it would ruin everything about this movie. It has to be seen to be believed. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA:  But I'm sure you're asking yourselves did Kevin actually do something simple? With the characters he's created. Well kind of especially with his first movie "Clerks" (Cut to opening credit of "Clerks" with "I can't even tell" by Soul Asylum playing in the background to clips of the movie as James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): The plot while simplistic has layers of depth that people can relate to. A slacker who works at a convenience store named Dante Hicks played by Brian O'Halloran is forced to come in on his day off to man the Quick Stop and the misadventures he has with his "Friend" though trust me, If I had a friend like Randal Graves played by Jeff Anderson, I wouldn't need any more enemies. If I were to tell you anymore about the plot it would ruin the movie. All I can say is give this movie a watch. It's a classic that gloriously showed what it was like in the 1990's to be out of school and working for any sort of living.(Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: But it wouldn't be the last we saw of Dante & Randal because outside of a cameo in "Jay & Silent Bob Strikes Back" and an Animated series which my associate The Rowdy Reviewer should review, I think everyone knows the last movie I'm going to be talking about. (Cut to opening credit of "Clerks II" with "Nothing But Flowers" by Talking head playing in the background to clips of the movie as James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): Taking place 12 years after the first and not taking any of the other movies out of cannon. Dante & Randal find themselves working at a fast food chain called "Mooby's" Interesting factoids about Mooby and the restaurant Dante & Randal work in "Mooby's" and as I said earlier The restaurant chain of "Mooby's"was first seen in "Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back" and the fictional character of Mooby was first mentioned in "Dogma" and the pose he makes is the same as "The Buddy Christ" which was seen in "Dogma" as well. But I digress, Dante has things starting to go his way. He has a smoking hot Fiancé played by Jennifer Schwalback Smith. He likes the person he works for played by Rosario Dawson. He's moving to Miami and getting a management job at a car wash and everything seems to be going his way that is until his last day at "Mooby's". What happens then? Well I know I sound like a broken record in this thing but trust me when I say, You have to watch the movie in order to understand it. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: I know I've been vague in these reviews but there's been a reason. (Cut to various clips from Kevin Smith's works with "I can't even tell" by Soul Asylum in the background while James does a voice over.)

TLOTA (Voice over): It's because I've experienced them and I loved them. I'm hoping that you find something you love in them because what I love about all of them was the characters, the stories, the settings, heck even the crazy events that happened in the movies are something I love. Because they came from the mind of a guy who finds the humor in the mundane and ordinary and find the insane in it all. For you Kevin Smith, I say Snootchie Bootchies with reverence, honor and respect in your field of work. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA: I'm James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and That's my opinion

Monday, March 9, 2015

The Different Cuts of Affleck the "Daredevil"


(A Hand pulling a card designed by Stevie Swigart with the statistics of James Faraci The Last Of The Americans while putting it into the Megaforce Morpher from the 0:00-0:03 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run and the words Ben to the Ben to the Ben AFFLECK is heard in the background. At the 0:04 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators Ben to the Ben is repeated while the image shows Ben Affleck’s face on James Faraci’s body morphing into James Faraci The Last Of The Americans with a Black Tee-Shirt with Ben Affleck’s face from “Pearl Harbor” on it, Blue Jeans and Tan Work boots until 0:07 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run as scene cuts to James stocking up on his arsenal from the Classic Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers Morpher and Ben Affleck’s face in “Daredevil” is on the coin, a bandoleer stocked up with Sonic Screwdrivers with Ben Affleck’s faces showing Different emotions from different films, Ammunition for a 303 British Rifle and said rifle, The Ring Of Aeon, The Gem From the Gauntlet Malachite’s Hand, Emmalina’s amulet and the Sword Of Caliverti from 0:08-0:15 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators. 0:15-0:29 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run shows James taking on all of popular culture until 0:30 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators shows when James pulls out a sonic screwdriver then cuts over to a slab of titanium where lasers cut out “The Last Of The Americans” until 0:36 mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run when James lands on top of the slab while doing a heroic pose on a black background the 0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it.)

TLOTA: I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans and the views that I’m about to express are that of my own and some of yours and with the end of my three month look on Ben Affleck I’ve decided to introduce a new review segment I like to call “The Different Cuts” (Show James, Paulo & Rebecca dressed as butchers grabbing the same reel of film and a diagram of the reel of film. James Paulo & Rebecca look at both the three go to a meat slicer, all three slice different thicknesses with Paulo’s cut saying “The” James’s cut saying “Different” and Rebecca’s cut saying “Cuts” before cutting back to James) This is where I look at the same movie and see where the cuts differentiate from one another.

 (Cut to Paulo & Rebecca Fonseca at the doorway into James’ office.)

Paulo: Doesn’t that guy you talk about have something similar?

Rebecca: New versus Old, I think it’s called. (Cut to James inside his office.)

TLOTA: The guy you’re thinking of is The Nostalgia Critic and the segment he does is called “Old versus New” but I’m not doing that it’s literally the same movie just different cuts and I see which one is the better either cut. (Cut to Paulo & Rebecca Fonseca at the doorway into James’ office.)

Paulo: Oh okay, we’ll be outside if you need us. (Cut to James inside his office)

TLOTA: Well now that I’ve gotten that explanation of what this new review segment is about, I’ve heard of dumber reasons why Ben Affleck shouldn’t be a member of either “The Avengers” or “Justice League”. (Cut to Daredevil opening credit while “Right Before Your Eyes” from Hoobastank plays in the background then cut to clips of “Daredevil” play while James does a voiceover)

TLOTA (Voice over): Daredevil, based on the Marvel character, is technically not a bad movie nor is it a good movie. I’ll explain. When I saw it in the theaters and I enjoyed it but as I’ve seen it on TV I’ve seen more of the flaws in it. Partly having discovered that 20th Century Fox had meddled with the movie without discussing it with the writer & director Mark Steven Johnson (Cut to a photo of Mark Steven Johnson with James saying “YES the same one who worked on the Elektra movie, Ghost Rider movie and Jack Frost but regardless…” before cutting back to James doing a voice over clips of “Daredevil”)

TLOTA (Voice over): Mark Steven Johnson decided to correct what 20th Century Fox with a Director’s cut that fills in some of the plot holes but it also takes away some of what made the theatrical cut good. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA: So let’s not waste any more time let’s start off with the movies differ greatly, The Plot! (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score as the words “The Plot” is written in the same font the “Daredevil” title card is in between the center of both covers before cutting to James doing a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): The premise of the plot is that Matt Murdock played by Affleck was blinded as a kid with a radioactive liquid but in return enhanced his other senses to compensate and as a young kid he trained himself to use his disability into an advantage. Especially when his dad a one-time thug who was at one point a boxer blamed himself for what happened to Matt and when he made a comeback it didn’t end well especially when it came to a moment when he was supposed to throw a fight and didn’t and suffered Superhero Movie Cliché # 33: Death of a parental or mentor figure. Years later Matt has become “Daredevil” a vigilante who goes into the night to hunt criminals that somehow have evaded justice. One case in particular that they in both cuts had was when a criminal named Quesada played by Paul-Ben Victor got away with rape. I mean my god imagine if the Special Victims Unit of the 16th precinct in Manhattan had handled it. (Cut to a green screened courtroom where D.A. Rafael Barba played by James Faraci, Attorney John Buchanan played by Eric Gaede, Detective Rollins played by Elisa Hanson-Schuler, Sergeant Benson being played by Rachel Tietz, Detective Carisi being played by Paul “Paw” Schuler, Detective Amaro being played by Paulo Fonseca, Detective Tutuola being played by Malcolm Ray and the Judge played by Chris Lee Moore)

John Buchanan: Your honor this is a farce! My client simply was there at the wrong time but she asked for it, she deserved it.

D.A. Rafael Barba: She deserved to be beaten and violated like an animal because she wouldn’t put out to that slime your fat fucking ass calls a client! (Gavel bangs as camera cuts to the Judge.)

Judge: Mr. Barba, please show some restraint and décor it would behoove you. (Cut to the detectives behind the D. A.’s table.)

Detective Rollins: Hey guys is it me or is Barba on the verge of snapping like a twig?

Sergeant Benson: Relax after the case he’ll have a few and he’ll be fine.

Detective Tutuola: I don’t know, I think Rollins may be making a point here.

Detective Amaro: Yeah look into his eyes, the cheese is about to fall off the cracker!

Detective Carisi: I agree with Benson let’s get through this and then we’ll get him to relax. (Cut to the Attorneys)

John Buchanan: The truth is my client was….

D.A. Rafael Barba: YOUR CLIENT IS GUILTY AND YOU ARE A VACUOUS THUNDER TWAT FOR THINKING CRIMES AGAINST YOUR FELLOW MAN ESPECIALLY WHEN ONE BASTARD BELIEVES THAT “BITCHES SHOULD BE CORRECTED” SHOULDN’T BE PUNISHED! (Gavel bangs) OH BANG AWAY AT THAT GAVEL A FAT FUCKING LOT THAT SHIT DOES WHEN THAT PIECE OF FILTH DEFENSE REPRESENTS SHOULD BE BARKING IN HELL ALONG WITH YOU, YOU FAT FUCK!  (Pulls a gun out of an off screen’s court officer’s holster and shoots Buchanan and the off-screen client.)

Judge (Off Screen): COURT OFFICERS, GET THE JURY OUT OF HERE NOW! RESTRAIN THAT MA… (Barba shoots and kills the Judge with an argh being heard as the last thing out of his mouth!)

D.A. Rafael Barba: THE REVOLUTION HAS BEGUN DEATH TO THE YANKEE PIGS!  (Sergeant Benson yells “JUMP HIM!” off screen and the detectives pile on to restrain D.A. Rafael Barba as the scene ends and the movie continues as James does a voice over.)

TLOTA (Voice Over): But where is the plot stronger? Well the Director’s cut adds a subplot that has a Criminal played by Coolio framed for a murder done by the right hand man to the main enemy played by Leland Orser and made it look like the criminal did the murder which slows everything down but at the same time adds depth to everything however it slows Matt’s Character Development which is where I think the theatrical cut is better. The pace of the Theatrical cut’s plot makes it better because it’s more focused on Matt’s journey from just another vigilante to a hero that does better in darkness.

TLOTA: But gun to my head if I had to choose which movie had the better plot I’d say the Director’s cut. (Cut to clips of “Daredevil” while James does a voice over.)

TLOTA (Voice over): And while the theatrical cut of the movie is great, the Director’s one adds more of a sense of accomplishment knowing that Daredevil will be redeemed and to be honest it feels more of a completed film. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: So the first point goes to The Director’s cut. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” and a one point mark over the Director’s cut while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score before cutting to James)

TLOTA: But Plot is only part of the equation in my theory on what makes a movie great. The editing of scenes also plays a part on how well the movie is. Let’s see which one was edited better. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score as the words “Editing” is written in the same font the “Daredevil” title card is in between the center of both covers before cutting to James doing a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice Over): When you edit a movie you have a ton of takes for the editor to put together for scenes and the scenes either can make or break a movie. Take for instance the introduction of The Kingpin played by The Late Great Michael Clarke Duncan. In the theatrical cut we see him looking suave dressed in his finest thinking he has the world on a string sitting on a gold & diamond encrusted throne. However we see him kill his guards like an animal in the Director’s cut while dressed in those said finest which in my opinion may imply that underneath that suave exterior is an animal but the theatrical cut feels like it was more like it was done with Subtlety or for instance the moments between Elektra & Matt, one moment that stands out to me is when the two are standing in the rain in the Theatrical cut that moment comes after Matt nearly pounded a thug into ground hamburger and scaring a little kid and the said night Matt hears another thug claiming Hell’s Kitchen as the Kingpin’s territory as much as the rest of New York City as Matt is just about to leave Elektra on the Roof in a weird way she convinces him not to go thus giving him a reason not to always be about scaring and killing the bad guys thus saving a part of Matt’s humanity. However in the Director’s cut it is implied that not even being with someone like Elektra can save him from what he feels is his mission to save Hell’s Kitchen from the forces of the Kingpin. Another moment is after the murder of Nikolas Natchios played by Erick Avari when Matt erupts in anger. In the theatrical cut Matt goes to the priest who knew that Matt was Daredevil all along to admit that the priest was right. But in the Director’s Cut it goes to a moment that was seen later on in which News announcers are claiming that the Daredevil killed Nikolas and calling Nikolas the Kingpin. But there was a problem with that scene, ELEKTRA WAS THERE! She saw Daredevil’s weapon being used by Bullseye played by Colin Farrell kill Nikolas. Not once did Bull’s-eye say that Nikolas was the Kingpin or even mention the Kingpin at all! But it gets worse Elektra blames the death of her father on Daredevil! And while yes she makes a point that it was his weapon Bull’s-Eye actually used the weapon so shouldn’t she be blaming Bull’s-Eye? Eh at this point I’m getting off track, the point is that after the moment with News Reporters Bull’s-Eye meets with the Kingpin and comes up with a game plan to finish off both Daredevil and Elektra then in a subplot that I mainly forgot in the plot synopsis for the Director’s cut was that a criminal played by Coolio was put on trial for a murder of a woman who became close to and was in actually murdered by the Kingpin’s second hand man played by Leland Orser but that isn’t discovered until after a whole lot of scenes like a moment in which the aforementioned trial scene comes the funeral scene and to be honest  the funeral scene in both is really good partly due to the song “My Immortal” by the band Evanescence and the fact the dialogue realizes that the tables have turned Elektra is blinded by anger and Matt can see that it’s not the right way so to speak. After Elektra leaves Matt to ponder what is gonna happen next Ben Urich played by Joe Pantoliano who throughout both cuts have been on the trail of both Daredevil & the Kingpin also had information that can clear the criminal and imply the Kingpin and the fight at the end of the movie between Daredevil and The Kingpin is handled differently in both cuts while we see that Daredevil’s radar sense is distorted I think I didn’t need to see the moment where Daredevil is being beaten by Kingpin in the Radar sense I actually feel it was better in the Director’s cut. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: But which cut was edited better? (Cut to clips of “Daredevil” while James does a voice over.)

TLOTA (Voice over): Well the scenes and case for the criminal added into the Director’s Cut does lengthen the movie thus making the audience feel like things that shouldn’t have been edited out I feel the theatrical cut is as good because honestly this felt like it was the beginning of something freaking good but I think both cuts played its strongest hand by giving the audience the battle between Daredevil and The Kingpin at the end thus compromising the foundation for sequels. But the Theatrical cut gives its audience a thrill by keeping it short, sweet and simple but the point again must go to the Director’s cut because it gives the depth that the theatrical cut lacks. (Cut to James)

TLOTA: So the point goes again to The Director’s cut. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” and a second point mark over the Director’s cut while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score before cutting to James)

TLOTA: Well so far the Director’s cut has two points and the theatrical cut has nada but a lot can happen after the break. Why am I taking a break? Because watching two movies at the same time is EXHAUSTING!

(0:36-end mark from the theme from the final season of American Gladiators original run play the camera moves back to see James on top of the slab with the words “The Last Of The Americans” on it act as the commercial break intro and return act to the review cutting to the movie while James does a voice over cutting to James physically.)

TLOTA: So now that I got most of technical aspects out of the way let’s get to where things definitely differ greatly. The use of the characters and the actors who play them. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score as the words “Use Of Characters & Actors” is written in the same font the “Daredevil” title card is in between the center of both covers before cutting to James doing a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): I’ll admit that the talent in the cast is excellent in both save for one performance and I know certain people thought Jennifer Garner as Elektra was bad but action wise she was kick-ass but acting wise so much that came out of her mouth fell flat as a table read! What happened to her? Was she Shaymalized before filming began?(Cut to Rebecca as Jennifer Garner in her trailer as a puff of Smoke appears behind her revealing Shaymalan played by James Faraci vocally but physically by Malcolm Ray)

Shaymalan: You know what has to happen next.

Jennifer Garner: No! Wait! Please let me get Shaymalized in the next movie I’m making! Not This one!

Shaymalan: Afraid not, but if it’ll make you feel any better I will repeat the process if you reprise the role! Now prepare to be Shaymalized! (Cut to set of Daredevil where James plays Ben Affleck, Paulo Fonseca plays Mark Steven Johnson and Rebecca Fonseca plays Jennifer Garner.)

Ben Affleck: Excuse me I was wondering if could you get me some honey.

Jennifer Garner (Unemotional and Shaymalized): It’s right in front of you.

Ben Affleck: Uh could you be a little more specific?

Jennifer Garner (Unemotional and Shaymalized): What? Are you…?

Ben Affleck: Blind?

Mark Steven Johnson (Off screen): And Cut, print, beautiful! (Walks on screen): Hey Jennifer, you were amazing!

Ben Affleck: Are you shitting me Mark, Even at my worse I couldn’t be that unemotional. (Cell phone buzzes in his pocket.) Excuse me for a moment. (Pulls out cell phone.) Hello, Yeah, Yeah, I got it! I got it and Jen is in there as well? Great. Hey Mark we got hurry up. My girl Jenny from the block and I have been casted in this great movie called “Gigli” and if I’m lucky it’ll make me and J. Lo more infamous. (Ben walks away with a shit eating grin on his face as Jennifer sighs)

Jennifer Garner: Scott and I have hit a rough patch and I need a clean break and start anew. I wonder if Ben will ever notice me. (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: Regardless of Jennifer’s performance which cut has the better amount? (Cut to clips of “Daredevil” while James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): While some characters got little screen time, they did leave an impact like the character of Father Everett played by Derrick O’Connor who in the Theatrical cut knew that Matt was Daredevil and tried to get him to see what was happening around him when he becomes Daredevil, however in the Director’s cut I think the poor man of God got the short end of the crucifix. Then we have the secretary to Matt & Franklin played by Ellen Pompeo. In the theatrical cut she got maybe a few seconds on screen. But in the Director’s cut she got a minute or two at the most but made the most of it by helping Franklin solve the murder the criminal didn’t commit. Then there is Ben Urich played by Joe Pantoliano in the Theatrical cut it was implied that by the start of the third act that he discovered Matt was in fact Daredevil but in the Director’s cut it is implied that Ben doesn’t discover that fact until the middle of the ending. Then we have Franklin “Foggy” Nelson played by Jon Favreau, that’s right Happy Hogan had some experience in the Marvel Universe before the Iron Man movies. In the theatrical cut while a bottom feeder through and through and doing anything to quickly get to the top he somehow doesn’t convince Matt to go to The Ball thrown by Elektra’s father. However in the Director’s cut it took about as much effort to convince Matt to go to the Ball as it did for the writers of “The Adventures Of Sonic The Hedgehog” not “Sonic Sat. A.M.” to write every single episode of that show. But I also get Jon Favreau’s characterization of “Foggy” was trying to do better but he wanted to short circuit the process and still somehow remain a decent man. Then we have The Kingpin played by the Late Michael Clarke Duncan as I said earlier while his intros differ between the two cuts Michael seemed to have kept The Kingpin’s essence. Then there is Bullseye in both cuts he is just a hoot to watch, The cheese And then there is the main character Matt Murdock played by Ben Affleck while in the Theatrical cut we see how personal the journey is for him, in the Director’s cut he still goes through the journey but he also feels that the less people he lets in the better which I think explains the difference in the rain scene where Elektra basically tells him without saying it that it’s okay to let me in to help in the theatrical cut where in the Director’s cut he was trying to keep her safe by going into the darkness and going essentially what his destiny to fight in the darkness and being harder than the criminals he fights and if you listen to Ben Affleck’s voice I now think that maybe he would be a better Batman voice wise as opposed to Christian Bale, Just listen to Ben’s voice as Daredevil, it sounds a hundred times more like Batman than Christian Bale’s voice. (Cut to clips where Daredevil says “I’m Not the Bad Guy” & “Justice is served” and him talking to Elektra in mid battle before it cuts to James physically)

TLOTA: But all things considered I do think that both cuts actually did something right. Both cuts used the characters properly. (Cut to clips of “Daredevil” while James does a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): But again the Director’s cut edges out the Theatrical cut by a Kevin Smith cameo. While yes Kevin Smith worked on the Daredevil story line “Guardian Devil” and based the look of Matt on Ben Affleck and he gets at least a few seconds more on screen and that for me is more than enough to be point worthy (Cut to James physically)

TLOTA: So the point goes once again to The Director’s cut. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” and a third point mark over the Director’s cut while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score before cutting to James)

TLOTA When all things considered which cut actually has what I call the “Re-Watch” factor, the Director’s cut or the Theatrical cut. (Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score as the words “Re-Watch Factor” is written in the same font the “Daredevil” title card is in between the center of both covers before cutting to James doing a voice over)

TLOTA (Voice over): For those unaware the “Re-Watch” Factor is when even after seeing the movie in theaters and on DVD, Blu-Ray and Streaming would you see it if you hadn’t seen it after a while and the question you ask yourself is do I want to watch it again? And for me both cuts have it in spades. If I decide to check out the Director’s cut, I want to see the movie shown through the director’s perspective but if I want to see the movie through the editor and producer’s perspective I will check out the Theatrical Cut. But here’s the reason I like both cuts and why they have the “Re-Watch” Factor. It’s not only because of Ben Affleck’s performance of both halves of the coin of Matt Murdoch and Daredevil. It’s not only because they used CGI semi-properly to allow us what it was like to see through the eyes of a blind person but both have the “Re-Watch” Factor because both tell the same story but slightly differently. (Cut to James Physically)

TLOTA: So it is a tie for the re-watch factor and no way can I edge out one from another but the total points go to The Director’s cut.

(Show DVD covers of the Director and Theatrical cuts of “Daredevil” and a fourth point mark over the Director’s cut and a one point mark over the Theatrical cut while “Matt Becomes Daredevil” track from the Original Motion Picture Score before cutting to the same type of text used in the ending of “Mallrats” and music “Suzanne” from Weezer playing in the background as images of everyone is seen to show what was going to happen to everyone with “D.A. Rafael Barba is currently institutionalized at the same mental institute Film Brain and The Blockbuster Buster are currently residing at.” “According to HIS Lawyer he should be sane in a few weeks” “James and his brother took Rowdy, Paulo & Rebecca to their first Comic-con in New York as a reward for putting up with James for this long.” “And as far as James is concerned about his neutral attitude towards both the theatrical and director’s cut of “Daredevil” is because neither cut of the movie feels original, in fact the most common negative comment was that it was “A Rip off of the Spider-Man movie directed by Sam Raimi” is something James agrees with.” “However if you’re up for either cut they’re available on DVD & Blu-Ray. Give them a watch and you might find something you like in it.” Before cutting back to James physically)

TLOTA: I’m James Faraci The Last Of The Americans, That’s my Opinion and the rest of this year we’re going FULL THROTLE!